Empty Smile
The final Bell has rung. Goodbye to all.
- Jul 13, 2018
- 1,785
I honestly can't even.... Words won't even come...
- Status
Jean4
Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
- Apr 28, 2019
- 7,557
One second at a time. One second at a time. It will get better. Maybe if I tell myself this it will sink in?
Jean4
Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
- Apr 28, 2019
- 7,557
Jean4
Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
- Apr 28, 2019
- 7,557
Empty Smile
The final Bell has rung. Goodbye to all.
- Jul 13, 2018
- 1,785
Here's your popcorn coffin we talked about.
R.I.P. Stan...
Jean4
Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
- Apr 28, 2019
- 7,557
NitriteAnatomy
Lost. Alone. Trapped. Need escape.
- Nov 21, 2019
- 450
SuicidalSymphonies
I think I'll take a dirt nap.
- Oct 13, 2019
- 1,028
May you rest easy, Stan. You were amazing to all of us and were always there to offer a helping hand. It saddens me to see you, now crossed out. But I will always remember the good.
Jean4
Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
- Apr 28, 2019
- 7,557
Morning Stan.
Yes. We are glad you are at peace. No. We are not ready to let you go. Crying will stop one day. Just not now.
Yes. We are glad you are at peace. No. We are not ready to let you go. Crying will stop one day. Just not now.
Empty Smile
The final Bell has rung. Goodbye to all.
- Jul 13, 2018
- 1,785
Jean4
Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
- Apr 28, 2019
- 7,557
I think this post will last forever. Like a celebrity's grave and fans leave flowers. You never saw how important you were to so many and how much you meant to everyone here. I wish before you went your logical side could have seen that.
NitriteAnatomy
Lost. Alone. Trapped. Need escape.
- Nov 21, 2019
- 450
Posted this elsewhere on the forum, but screw it. Here it is again.
Jean4
Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
- Apr 28, 2019
- 7,557
Keep em going. Even if already posted. It's how you are feeling at the moment.
NitriteAnatomy
Lost. Alone. Trapped. Need escape.
- Nov 21, 2019
- 450
More than at the moment, lol. All the songs I've posted, so far, are one's I listened to that entire vigil, especially the Kansas one.
Jean4
Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
- Apr 28, 2019
- 7,557
We all have our songs. Mine is Lulu - To Sir With Love. For whatever reason that is the special song. Could post it over and over.
NitriteAnatomy
Lost. Alone. Trapped. Need escape.
- Nov 21, 2019
- 450
How I picture @Stan when he met the reaper.
Jean4
Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
- Apr 28, 2019
- 7,557
In that particular shirt. I still have to figure out how to post gifs. Stan is shaking his head in disbelief I can't figure it out!How I picture @Stan when he met the reaper.
not-2-b-the-answer
Archangel
- Mar 23, 2018
- 9,326
Sorry I missed your exit … I hope you finally found peace.
I know you're gone and won't see this but you are missed.
NitriteAnatomy
Lost. Alone. Trapped. Need escape.
- Nov 21, 2019
- 450
In the bar above the comment box we type in, in the center are icons of a chain, a photo, camera and smiley. I normally find the gif via web link (all the text inside the web search bar) and copy it, then click the photo icon. Inside the little window that pops up, it gives you the option for dropping a picture or uploading it, but there's also another little 'chain' icon in that window. Click that and paste the URL into the box and click insert.
Jean4
Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
- Apr 28, 2019
- 7,557
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Empty Smile
The final Bell has rung. Goodbye to all.
- Jul 13, 2018
- 1,785
Post how I'm feeling at the moment? Sadly, this is me all the time....
APharmaDestroyedLife
Your RX drugs are likely your real problem
- Nov 4, 2019
- 305
I wish I had known him longer, he seemed like the kind of person you could sit in a bar with and talk until closing time on any number of subjects. He was clearly an educated individual.
When I first joined this site (not long ago) I made some comments and replies to threads that I realize now were in no way helpful. That was not my intent It was largely because I started believing all the fear spreading that was going on at that time. I was not educated enough or well enoughed researched. The idea of failure and horror stories quickly got me on the fearmongering band wagon which was never my true intention. Fear has always been my biggest enemy, and my Fear always finds me, it knows things about me I don't want anyone to know, and somehow it has always seemed to dominate my life.
I also have very intense emotions for others, others I've never known. Seeing suffering in the world hurts me deeply, and knowing others suffer , well... its like I feel that suffering with them. I just can't stand to idea of people suffering , becoming disabled or brain damaged, when all we are all contemplating is, putting an end to our own current suffering, the idea of making that earthly suffering worse terrified me.
Stan and another called me out on a few threads. I think they expected I was here for "other" reasons. Rather than responding with retaliation, I took some time to consider the replies and do some research... a week or so later ( 2 days before he left us) I started a conversation with Stan. I explained I was not trying to scare people, but I was scared myself... we had a few exchanges all of which (at least on his part) were well thought out, well written, and kind. He put a lot of effort into me, a guy who just joined this group. He treated me and spoke to me with respect, understanding, kindness, and a lot of other things from philosophy to science.
I don't know why I am writing this, maybe to honor him and show respect to him for how much time he took in his own life (even towards the end) to put into someone he barely even knew.
I hope someday, in some other place, some other time, or some other reality I can get to know what a truly interesting person I am sure you were, and if at the end of the tunnel there is nothing. Well, I can take comfort in knowing many have come before me, and many will go after. Death is the 1 thing that binds us all together and none can escape it, and no matter how different we all are, somehow I find comfort in knowing we are all really the same and we all end up in the same place.
Rest in peace Stan.
When I first joined this site (not long ago) I made some comments and replies to threads that I realize now were in no way helpful. That was not my intent It was largely because I started believing all the fear spreading that was going on at that time. I was not educated enough or well enoughed researched. The idea of failure and horror stories quickly got me on the fearmongering band wagon which was never my true intention. Fear has always been my biggest enemy, and my Fear always finds me, it knows things about me I don't want anyone to know, and somehow it has always seemed to dominate my life.
I also have very intense emotions for others, others I've never known. Seeing suffering in the world hurts me deeply, and knowing others suffer , well... its like I feel that suffering with them. I just can't stand to idea of people suffering , becoming disabled or brain damaged, when all we are all contemplating is, putting an end to our own current suffering, the idea of making that earthly suffering worse terrified me.
Stan and another called me out on a few threads. I think they expected I was here for "other" reasons. Rather than responding with retaliation, I took some time to consider the replies and do some research... a week or so later ( 2 days before he left us) I started a conversation with Stan. I explained I was not trying to scare people, but I was scared myself... we had a few exchanges all of which (at least on his part) were well thought out, well written, and kind. He put a lot of effort into me, a guy who just joined this group. He treated me and spoke to me with respect, understanding, kindness, and a lot of other things from philosophy to science.
I don't know why I am writing this, maybe to honor him and show respect to him for how much time he took in his own life (even towards the end) to put into someone he barely even knew.
I hope someday, in some other place, some other time, or some other reality I can get to know what a truly interesting person I am sure you were, and if at the end of the tunnel there is nothing. Well, I can take comfort in knowing many have come before me, and many will go after. Death is the 1 thing that binds us all together and none can escape it, and no matter how different we all are, somehow I find comfort in knowing we are all really the same and we all end up in the same place.
Rest in peace Stan.
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Jean4
Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
- Apr 28, 2019
- 7,557
Thank you so much for this. He was very protective of this forum and was determined to keep it a safe place. You said exactly who he was.
Ever notice how the sadness gets worse at night?
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Thank you Nitrite You did something Stan couldn't. Teach me to gif!
I have one of those, the smart one, thw cockatoo. And a few other ones as well :)
As long as you are in our hearts, you will never die, I know you never disclosed why CTB, but I remember you saying that if you went missing for a week nobody would notice, well this "family" here noticed . I still don't understand the why, guess will never will, but I grieve: for his children in particularly, for Jean, for us, and because someone who gave so much support to others after finding true love, still chose this way.... but he is in peace now and he earned it....
Jean4
Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
- Apr 28, 2019
- 7,557
Last edited by a moderator:
Jean4
Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
- Apr 28, 2019
- 7,557
Trust me. I am not doing well right now. It was a break from crying lol. ;)
APharmaDestroyedLife
Your RX drugs are likely your real problem
- Nov 4, 2019
- 305
Didnt mean that to come off that way, it was an attempt at humor. I just meant a person of strong conviction or opinion which to me are not bad traits in a kind person. I took that off as to not offend anyone with a misinterpretation of the spirit in which I wrote it.
Jean4
Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
- Apr 28, 2019
- 7,557
I didn't and it made me smile for a second. You nailed who Stan was. Thank You.
- Status
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