bipolar22
Notorious shtposter
- Aug 31, 2022
- 279
due to refractory ulcer i cant have a drink. ever again 2 years i went without now. i alawys hated life and when i first drank i was like wow i can see the beauty and joy of being alive . it was the only thing that helped me thought trauma, my bpd my social anxiey and expierence true happiness. and now its gone. forever. i binge on benzos once a year but its not the same its more like sleeping pills nothing with that emcompassing bliss and pure wonder and joy a night of drinks can bring. so now its more clear than ever i wil kill myself. the only thing that really gave me a feeling of being truely happy has been taking from me. finally. and im done with fucking life. fucking endless cruelty end punishments. fuck life and fuck you stomach for being such a pathetic piece of shit not even letting me have this. im on corrently on 30 mg on lorezepam and its like a fucking chamille tea. this is the final nail in the coffein and i dont wanna find healty outlets or ways to make it bearlable in a more healthy way. im just done with this. its all a lie and the punishment never stops.
i know im repeating myself from before and my spelling is atroucious and nobody probalby will read this but i just felt like typing it out for myself. fuck life. i dispise it to the marrow of my bones. pleasant night to all of you
i know im repeating myself from before and my spelling is atroucious and nobody probalby will read this but i just felt like typing it out for myself. fuck life. i dispise it to the marrow of my bones. pleasant night to all of you
