Asking God to help me ctb

[setspiritfree]

Anybody else ask God to help them end it? I do, every night to no avail.
I have some serious acid reflux or swallowing issues where the food gets stuck halfway down. I literally just had the worst attack one of my life. Most of the time I pray for it to go away but this time I prayed for it to suffocate me. It was close damn it. It was horrible pain but maybe it will make me more comfortable once I have the rope around my neck. I got to admit it feels good to breathe again but I wish it just would have choked me out.

 

[itsgone2]

Anybody else ask God to help them end it? I do, every night to no avail.

Yes. I have asked to just be taken away from this. Not often. But I have.

 

[jatty]

Yes, im not even religious but i was so desperate i was on my knees and praying asking him to give me the courage to do what i want. Its very ironic and opposing, and no use, but i just need strength. From anyone.

 

[woodlandcreature]

ex catholic here, when i was little i used to pray i'd get cancer. now, yes, i often pray that my heart issues will kill me in my sleep or i"ll have an aneurysm. other times i ask for the things i need to get the job done myself.

 

[DTA]

Good luck with that.
I sympathize with you though. I spent eighteen years praying for death every single day. If I ever have to stand before God I will bring that up.

 

[Hollowman]

No, because there is no god.

 

[Jan1193]

I hope not to offended anyone here, this is a calm and kind place to everyone with our tendencies and I just want to give a hug to every person here, suffering unfairly.

I don't believe in god since my mother pass away a few years ago, and sometimes I think I forgot how to pray correctly. I used to "pray" and ask to my mother (now a kind of guardian or little divinity) for some stuff in my best days, but now that I'm in a serial relapse of my chronical depression and want to CBT again, I'm not asking to her anymore, I just "pray" in my mind, feeling espiritually so lonely in fact, just for being death in a similar way that my mother was, quiet and fast I think, or a terminal, agressive and fast cancer even if it's painfull if that's the sh*t that I really deserve. I don't care anymore. Just asking to the universe, or the void, the death itself or whoever/whatever who can listen me

 

[Off_Switch]

This is hell. There is only Satan here.

 

[$yck]

I used to pray and ask God to kill me in my sleep, or purposefully lie and say "God strike me down if I'm lying" or "I put that on my life". Recently, I've been praying to God to allow me to find peace in death and [if it's real] be welcomed into eternal paradise. I'm Agnostic as shit, and I also feel like an all loving all powerful God wouldn't let any of the bullshit that's happened happen, but I just wanna say something surrounding religion/God just in case they do exist.

 

[somethingisntreal]

I no longer believe in god but when I was a child i used to beg god to kill me