Discussion Anyone devoted to ctb even when everything is fine ?

[Mywill]

It has been long since I posted here, and since then I had been trying real hard to get my life together. I started taking care of myself, going outside more and be a normal person. However, It still lingers me that I should be dead already. It just feels that I have 2 conscious inside my body. I feel like being controlled and yet wanted to break free. Which I'm losing to.

 

[Mebius]

If you have a normal stable and low stress life you shouldnt consider suicide. But chances are you havent actually got that, just like 99% people. The only way in my opinion to have a calm life would probably be off grid life.

 

[Mywill]

If you have a normal stable and low stress life you shouldnt consider suicide. But chances are you havent actually got that, just like 99% people. The only way in my opinion to have a calm life would probably be off grid life.

I honestly have no idea what a normal and low stress life supposed to be, I am not doing anything dangerous to myself and yet I am constantly on the edge of breaking down. I woke up everyday to force myself to go for a walk and maybe a drink at the coffee shop. I would consider this maybe what normal people do ? I live on benefits so no stress for me financially.

 

[Mebius]

I honestly have no idea what a normal and low stress life supposed to be, I am not doing anything dangerous to myself and yet I am constantly on the edge of breaking down. I woke up everyday to force myself to go for a walk and maybe a drink at the coffee shop. I would consider this maybe what normal people do ? I live on benefits so no stress for me financially.

A low stress life in my opinion (absolute bare minimum):
- You are not ugly
- You are financially safe
- You have no people bothering you
- You have a comfortable routine

But this is bare minimum, but you will definitely want more from life, then you want to:

- Be attractive
- Be rich
- Have family
- etc

Except you cant do that, hell even if you could, it needs a colossal effort and struggle to do it, so it defeats the purpose in the first place.

If I am being honest with you, I dont think you can even fit the bare minimum, not having one is enough to ruin it all.

This is what I've learned consuming Blackpill contents, which I absolutely do not recommend unless you want to literally lose your mind. Seriously, dont look up what Blackpill is.

 

[Mywill]

Either I am losing my mind because of the medications, or before that I made the decision on ctb. I chose the latter.