Will your CTB be a surprise or expected.

[ddn.ctb]

As I understand about 50 percent of all suicides are considered to be a surprise to their friends or family. They claim it was totally unexpected.

I'd fall into that category. I feel alone because I have no one to talk to about it. The forum helps to work my feelings I can't express Irl

 

[TheMetalhead]

Expected. My friends know, recently told my parents that I will kill myself but I doubt they actually believe me.

 

[FuneralCry]

If I had a reliable plan to free myself from this existence and I managed to leave on my own terms, I believe that my ctb wouldn't be expected, I see it as such a terrible idea being open about wanting to die in this anti-suicide society anyway. But it isn't like it could ever matter to me how my death is viewed as, as I simply won't exist, I'll be at peace, finally free from everything. Death is the most normal thing, we are destined for nothing but to die.

 

[CuerpoMuerto]

Id imagine most people would be surprised as I have been visibly "recovering" by withdrawing from my meds and presenting happier. But my close friends would see this coming, I have talked about suicide methods before and have attempted prior.

 

[ddn.ctb]

Id imagine most people would be surprised as I have been visibly "recovering" by withdrawing from my meds and presenting happier.

I sometimes think we have to play out this theatre that everything is okay to keep up with expectations

 

[front of me]

The percentage may not be accurate. Some people may say that it was surprising and unexpected. In order to divert accusations away from him, no one wants to be involved in the death of a person knowing that he may die by suicide.
I am certain that my family and my ex-boyfriend know for sure that I will die by suicide, but after my death it will be a "surprise" for them.

 

[backtoearth]

I have had multiple previous attempts from my teenage years and everyone has been walking on eggshells around me recently so they definitely expect it - its not like I've been able to hide the fact I have been getting more psychotic and unpredictable lately

 

[DeathSleep]

Mine would mostly be a surprise. Even with my last attempt I don't think anyone really expects it. Maybe one person who I've talked openly about it with in the past.

 

[skeletontree]

I think to some people of my direct surrounding it will be a surprise, because they basically know nothing/not much about my previous attempts or plans.

And then there are also those who kinda expect such a thing to happen (again), because the last failed attempt was not so long ago (early August), and at least one person (my only remaining IRL close friend) also knows that I'm not eager for any "recovery", and that I'm still feeling extremely hopeless, and suffering in agony.

But all in all, I can't say for sure, maybe it will still be a surprise for her, because she still believes in me and has hope.

 

[not_telling]

I think it would be somewhat unexpected. Most of my friends believe I'm sorta sad, but I don't think any of them have figured out how much. I have been trying very hard to hide it too. It's selfish to think like this I guess, but if I'm not there to help and care about them, I don't think other people would. At least not as much as they need, or deserve. They're wonderful, but, I don't know why, most can't handle the problems life unfaily sends them too well. I guess I can't deal with my own either, otherwise I wouldn't be running away from life itself. Yeah, selfish and a hypocrite. Fuck.

 

[lillmonix3]

I told a friend about my plans. She supports my decision, only asked me to write to her beforehand so that she could say goodbye to me . Of course, I am pleased, but it is still alarming that she can tell someone where to look for me.Although she always convinces me that she supports my choice and only agrees with my decision.

 

[ddn.ctb]

I told a friend about my plans. She supports my decision, only asked me to write to her beforehand so that she could say goodbye to me . Of course, I am pleased, but it is still alarming that she can tell someone where to look for me.Although she always convinces me that she supports my choice and only agrees with my decision.

Sounds like you have a wonderful friend you should celebrate.

 

[lillmonix3]

Sounds like you have a wonderful friend you should celebrate.

I also think so, but I don't think that this is true friendship. She rarely writes by herself, and in most cases I write first.I thought I could trust her, but recently she told her friends about my self-care and my mental health problems.That's why I'm wary of her now

 

[CryaSparrow]

To my family, it'll be a complete surprise.
To most of my "friends", it'll be a complete surprise.
To the two friends I named my account after, unfortunately, it'll be expected.

 

[Liamyzzuf]

I told a friend about my plans. She supports my decision, only asked me to write to her beforehand so that she could say goodbye to me . Of course, I am pleased, but it is still alarming that she can tell someone where to look for me.Although she always convinces me that she supports my choice and only agrees with my decision.

You are very lucky to have such an understanding friend.

I decided to be very open about my want to ctb so I would be mildly confused if people were "surprised" by my ctb. But I guess even if there are clear warning signs that doesn't guarantee a successful ctb.

 

[lillmonix3]

One friend is interested in death, because she wants to work as a pathologist/forensic expert, so she asked to record her a video of the process or to be in discord with her.Therefore, I am thinking of asking her to write how everything is going for me in the topic that I will create before this. Maybe my experience will help someone else.

 

[ddn.ctb]

I also think so, but I don't think that this is true friendship. She rarely writes by herself, and in most cases I write first.I thought I could trust her, but recently she told her friends about my self-care and my mental health problems.That's why I'm wary of her now

I am sorry to hear this - trust is really an important thing in friendships. What will be your next steps then?

 

[vitbar]

It would be a mixture. A lot of people know I experience depression. A few know I get ideation.

 

[ddn.ctb]

Maybe my experience will help someone else.

You never really know what will help but maybe it would. Will you ask directly??

 

[lillmonix3]

You never really know what will help but maybe it would. Will you ask directly??

I think so. It's just that she already knows about my plans, and all the more she wants to see it .Therefore, I do not think that it will be a big problem for her.but of course if she doesn't want to, then I won't force her.

 

[AshClouds]

No, I hide my feeling really well (ironically I'm quite proud of how well I keep it hidden), i'll go missing and nobody will even be aware that I CTB

 

[ddn.ctb]

I think so. It's just that she already knows about my plans, and all the more she wants to see it .Therefore, I do not think that it will be a big problem for her.but of course if she doesn't want to, then I won't force her.

She wants to see you, CTB? To me, there would be something comforting about someone being in the room with me. I have considered alternatives such as someone looking on Zoom. :) Hope things work out the way you want them to

No, I hide my feeling really well (ironically I'm quite proud of how well I keep it hidden), i'll go missing and nobody will even be aware that I CTB

I can hide my feelings quite well and usually can play it like I am on stage. The concept of just getting up and going out the door without ever being seen again - resonates with me

 

[lillmonix3]

She wants to see you, CTB? To me, there would be something comforting about someone being in the room with me. I have considered alternatives such as someone looking on Zoom. :) Hope things work out the way you want them to

As I wrote above, she is interested in death and wants to become a pathologist/forensic expert. When she found out about my plans, we talked about my plan with her, she said that she didn't even think that there was such a way.We agreed to use discord.I think it will be better for me if I can talk to someone and cry with someone.
Well, if she is interested in it, then why refuse. Because I am 7 thousand kilometers away from her and she will not be able to interfere with me.
Well, if she is interested in it, then why refuse.

 

[ddn.ctb]

As I wrote above, she is interested in death and wants to become a pathologist/forensic expert. When she found out about my plans, we talked about my plan with her, she said that she didn't even think that there was such a way.We agreed to use discord.I think it will be better for me if I can talk to someone and cry with someone.

Sounds like a really good situation for you to have someone to talk and cry with you. I envy you :)

 

[Cloud Busting]

I hinted and thought it would be clear but after survival people were still shocked.

Made me reconsider attempting again

 

[lillmonix3]

Sounds like a really good situation for you to have someone to talk and cry with you. I envy you :)

Yes, but I really feel sorry for her. It would probably be scary and unpleasant for me to see such a thing.

 

[tora]

I think my family expects me to make another attempt eventually but they probably don't expect me to do it as soon as I'm doing it. I made two attempts in my teen years and everyone who knows me well knows I have really severe mental health issues, so they won't be totally caught off guard. but I haven't been showing any of my usual symptoms that I show when I'm in an episode so they definitely aren't expecting me to kill myself this week, which is what I'm planning to do.

 

[uniqueusername987]

ooh this is interesting. Probably a surprise, there's a point where it would have been expected but most people thinking I'm doing well now, and I sorta was for a while.

 

[ddn.ctb]

ooh this is interesting. Probably a surprise, there's a point where it would have been expected but most people thinking I'm doing well now, and I sorta was for a while.

I always feel like actors trying to hide our real selves for the final act

 

[snowcloud9]

Surprise. My parents have been unsupportive and have called me lazy even when I tried to open up and tell them about it once. It only made them angry. My former social circle at uni thinks I just acted out for attention. Ha. Only my close friends believe my intentions, but they thankfully said that they wouldn't stop me and that it was my choice.