Why you stay alive?

[skyfall]

This world is so terrible, we are living in a so terrible condition. Why you stay alive?

 

[monolog]

I have 0 brain power and energy to prepare properly
I can't even read and understand all these math that low IQ I am

 

[EmptyBottle]

I'm a bit surprised I am still alive. The terribleness of the world can depend on perception sometimes (there is good, bad, and boring), and some sort of inertia sometimes keeps people alive.

 

[Seered Doom]

Good question, OP
Guess it's the universe saying "Screw you, you don't get an easy way out"

 

[Arni]

No strength, energy or courage to commit suicide again. And the fear of ending up in a mental hospital again

 

[Darkover]

you're born without consent, expected to carry the weight of existence, and yet you're denied an exit unless someone else deems your suffering "valid enough."

 

[Daenerys Targaryen]

Overcontrolled, which leads you to despair and fear that your SN will expire...

 

[MathConspiracy]

I'm waiting for the results of a writing contest. I want to know if I'll be a famous poet after my death.

 

[Michi_Violeta]

My mother. I'd be killing her. Pain is not enough yet to do it despite her suffering, maybe soon, but meanwhile I wait.

 

[skyfall]

I'm waiting for the results of a writing contest. I want to know if I'll be a famous poet after my death.

Good luck to you. Would you like to share your poems here?

 

[GhostInTheMachine]

I have just enough happiness to still fight for, for how long that lasts, I don't know.

 

[MathConspiracy]

Good luck to you. Would you like to share your poems here?

Thank you! I'd love to share my writing but I'm afraid that I would be recognized, it's really a shame how some mean people lurk here and take away our fun.

 

[TheMountainTreeEgg]

the only thing holding me together is my friends, family, and skateboarding. but I'm not sure how much longer I can endure.

 

[UnnamedGuy]

My family is what keeps me going. My mother is a fragile lady and I know for certain that if anything was to happen to me, it would break her heart and I just can't even bare to think about it. That's enough for me to continue, and I will fight as much as I can to keep it that way.

 

[PaperGodzilla]

i still like gaming and listening to new music, despite all the shit the world is filled with, art is great

 

[x3la]

Simple - i'm too much of a coward to actually attempt to ctb. And, i guess there's also the vague hope that someday i'll be able to live the life that i want, even if that possibility seems ever so smaller for every day that passes.

 

[Kimlett]

Mostly because of my family. But I would like to think that there are some good experiences waiting for me. The world is fucked up and always will be, but I have some hope that my life will be better sometime

 

[Lostmyonlyson]

I lack the constitution for suicide and have to get some financial stuff in order before ctb.

 

[aiyuxhan]

cause I need to plan a bit more lol

 

[Alias Pluto]

Because I won't die naturally apparently

 

[ididnotconsent]

The main reason is I'm to much of a pussy.

Second reason would be i don't want to hurt family.

 

[Pathetic and Sad]

have some responsibilities to fulfill before I can set myself free

 

[musingsofaghost]

My cats - they mean the world to me. There's still arrangements I have to make. And also because there's a little voice in my head that is holding out with hope for some happiness, no matter how minuscule it might be.

 

[WeepingDragon]

I got pretty close to dying this january, but I had friends who lost people to suicide and I didn't want to subject them to that pain again. It has been, and still is, my own deliberate choice to not make the last step into the void. Everything is already set up should I have a change of heart, but 3 months in, I'm still here.

So, to reply, now I'm trying to keep myself occupied with whatever, and it's working!

Might be a bit silly, but I want to adopt a cat. This is what I want to do. I want to give all my love to... well, whatever animal crosses my road, not just cats. But if I had to choose, I'd choose a cat

 

[Homulily]

I want to be helpful to my partner. I love her so much she means everything to me. I feel so grateful she'd love someone as worthless as me so I want to do everything I can to be helpful to her.
I've been abused a lot in the past so the idea of needing to be helpful or else bad things will happen, was brought into my mind by that.

She's nice though she's not like my abusive exs which is more of a reason why I need to be helpful and good so she can have an easier life, I need to do what I can to show how grateful I am otherwise I'm just being a parasite and she has every right to get rid of me then. She says she wouldn't but if she did then I would understand.

I want to live with her since being with her makes me feel at peace but right now we're separated cause of borders so I need to work really hard to be able to move together. We got engaged recently which, I don't understand why she'd think I'm good enough for that.
At all.
So I've been working as hard as I can to try to make it happen since maybe she sees something of value in me and I don't want to let her down. I don't want to let her down I can't let her down or she might leave like everyone else did. Or maybe she'd see that what everyone else did to me was justified once she sees that I'm not as good as she thought I was and then maybe she'd hurt me too, I'd deserve it of course but I don't want that to happen so I need to keep working hard or else it might happen again. She's so nice to me I don't want her to stop being nice to me. She's never even yelled at me we just talk our issues out.

I love her so much. I'd do anything for her and I'd stick by her side even if she realized my exs were right and that I deserve to be hurt.
I want her to be happy, I feel safe and happy around her.
I've been working as hard as I can the last week now that she's back home.
I broke down crying yesterday because of how much I was pushing myself but I need to make our dream a reality or she might realize I'm not worth staying with. I don't want that to happen. I want tonmake her happyy

 

[Daenerys Targaryen]

Excessive control, fear that my SN test attempt will fail, that it will expire, and terror of ending up alive in the morgue and having a live autopsy performed on me. Damn autopsies, I hate the world and that they won't even let us die in peace. And if I'm not dead, bury me alive, but please don't perform an autopsy on me, especially if I died by mistake.

 

[ididnotconsent]

Excessive control, fear that my SN test attempt will fail, that it will expire, and terror of ending up alive in the morgue and having a live autopsy performed on me. Damn autopsies, I hate the world and that they won't even let us die in peace. And if I'm not dead, bury me alive, but please don't perform an autopsy on me, especially if I died by mistake.

I'm pretty sure they check for a heartbeat before they take you to a morgue. They're not going to do an autopsy on someone with vital signs.

Do you fear that dead people are somehow conscious and that you will feel everything?

If that's the case everyone who's ever died is screwed.

 

[PragTar]

Same reason why I visit the "Recovery" section. Because I still have some hope. I believe (possibly naively) that there are still some things that could happen in my life that would make me want to stay here for longer. Not completely eliminating my will for CTB but at least making existence worthwhile for more time.

 

[DerezzMyself143]

My loved ones are the main reason I'm still here. Even if I hate myself on a daily basis and just wanna jump of a bridge, they still need me for the time being. I will eventually sucumb to the sweet kiss of death, but for now I feel that I need to keep fighting for them, at least for a while longer. Specially for my mom since she's aging faster due to physiological health issues.

Art is another important factor. As both a critic and an aspiring creator I appreciate just in how many ways someone can portray every aspect of human experience. Even the bleakest of thoughts and the most horrible experiences can inspire me to maybe vent some of my suffering in my work.

Last but not least, and this might sound a little weird but... children are also an important factor. I love to see them smile, play, be happy together. They give me hope, the strength to persist in this doomed world we inhabit. One of my wishes is eventually become a mother someday and that alone could give me a reason to keep fighting... if I even get the chance to survive by that point.