Venting Why I wanna give up

[floofyblepvibez]

due to problems in my childhood, I've become a people pleaser and bipolar. Recently I was in a relationship with a great guy that had lasted for 2 and a half years. They were the best years of my life but recently I realized that I was happy because he was happy. There were so many things that didn't make me happy but I ignored them for him. Dealing with the breakup is just destroying me and I'm harming almost every day now. I just want the pain to end. My family made it so much worse by saying I could have fixed the problems instead of leaving him and his brother just texted me saying he hopes we end up back together but I've already decided I can't. I feel like I've just ruined everything good that was happening for me. Friends I thought were close are distancing this summer and I'm finding myself alone more and more. I just can't take more of this, I want to ctb but my family is Christian and I also am. I'm afraid but it's so overwhelming I can't keep ignoring it.

 

[neurotic]

You've decided it was best for you, that's all that matters. Obviously being with him did not make you happy and you needed something more. In my opinion, you're right, staying with him may have only made things worse for both of you with your current mindset. They have no idea what is going on in your head. They don't know what being in a relationship with him is like on a personal level.

You're very brave for escaping the people pleaser mentality that has polluted your life for too long. It doesn't make you any less of a good person. I hope things get better for you!

 

[floofyblepvibez]

You've decided it was best for you, that's all that matters. Obviously being with him did not make you happy and you needed something more. In my opinion, you're right, staying with him may have only made things worse for both of you with your current mindset. They have no idea what is going on in your head. They don't know what being in a relationship with him is like on a personal level.

You're very brave for escaping the people pleaser mentality that has polluted your life for too long. It doesn't make you any less of a good person. I hope things get better for you!

Thank you, I really appreciate your kind thoughts. I needed that right now.

 

[Mord.]

I feel like I've just ruined everything good that was happening for me. Friends I thought were close are distancing this summer and I'm finding myself alone more and more. I just can't take more of this.

I feelt like you do. Every close friend i had i ruined the friendship and those friends that didn't leave me i stopped talking to them due to my self-sabotage. Don't be so hard on yourself, not every friend it's suposed to stay forever, and it's fine to make mistakes, we all are dealing with something and at the end of the day we only have ourselves. I hope everything gets better for you

 

[FuneralCry]

It must be really awful and tiring feeling trapped in that situation, existence is just too cruel. But anyway I wish you the best.

 

[The anhedonic one]

Most friends are just fair-weather friends.
Everyone moves on eventually.
And you can never really know another person anyway.
Everything changes.
Nothing is permanent.
Sorry you are going through this.
I know how it feels.