Venting Why do narcissistic parents threaten to kick you out while simultaneously discouraging independence?

[MrCasella]

 

[Crow_88]

Cuz you're not supposed to win.

 

[weallhaveourghosts]

Damn wish I knew. My mom would always ask about me moving out and when I finally did she flipped out. Said I couldn't cause how was she supposed to pay the bills (I was paying $700 a month to contribute to the cost of the house) and guilt tripped me by saying I was the reason she was in debt. Like I don't remember forcing your hand to buy me anything ever but okay.

 

[leloyon]

>"raisedbynarcissists"
opinion discard
EDIT: realise I probably should have expanded on my viewpoints so: if you say that someone is a "narcissist"/"sociopath"/"psychopath" and they don't have an actual diagnosis of NPD or ASPD then I will simply not take you seriously.
Also I do not come to a forum about mental health just to see mental illnesses be demonised. pwNPD and pwASPD are people too, and they suffer from their conditions.

 

[Unhumanly.]

because they wished the threat doesn't give their child an idea, instead to fear more, to remind them the control they have over their life

 

[Forever Sleep]

From what I've seen on YouTube about narcissism- it's probably about narcissistic supply- so- getting an intense emotional response from someone. As @Unhumanly. said, it may not be a genuine wish that the person leave. More a threat to make them experience and express an intense emotion. Guilt that they are so hard to live with that their own parents want to be rid of them, rejection and the desire to win back their parents love, fear that their parents could actually cut them off.

 

[username12345]

I don't know why. My mom thinks I just went homeless for no reason even though she was constantly telling me to be homeless/kicking me out telling me I didn't have a family anymore and screaming at me. She also was okay with my sibling beating me up so. I really hate that when people make things impossible in your life and they pretend like they didn't have a part in your suffering.

 

[Nobodi]

It's all about control. You'll have to move from them and sercure independence from them eventually in order to escape their abuse.

 

[MrCasella]

Thanks for the answers everyone now I know a little bit more about my dad and why he keeps threatening to kick me out.