Discussion who should be mindful of who?

[Life_and_Death]

Warning I see a possibility for an argument let's try to not and if we actually come to a solution that'll be awesome.

Ok so question. Be mindful of others but at what point, who should be mindful of who? Is there a compromise or is the compromise to just agree to ignore it because there is no answer?

Example. I feel physically uncomfortable saying women so I always just say girl(s). They both mean the female gender. However I can see how girl(s) can seem offensive as it is typically viewed as specifically a young female. I don't mean to offend people but at the same time why should I have to feel physically uncomfortable for you?

Asking a serious question, it would be awesome if we could keep it that way.

 

[CC123]

share using the words and terms that are meaningful and useful for you
those who care and respect you will understand what you are saying
those looking for a fight, it won't matter what you say or how you say something
be true to yourself

 

[CatabolicSeed]

Ladies is a better alternative.

 

[ashedout]

Hmmm I'm not sure there is a perfect answer for this especially over the internet.

My philosophy is to treat people how they want to be treated, do as least harm as possible, consider intent, and pick my battles. For example, since I know you prefer to say "girl", I would always try to be mindful of that in future interactions with you and speak to you in the way you want to be spoken to. This is so that I don't cause you harm and it doesn't cause me any harm to do. I don't always like being called "girl" over the alternative BUT since I know your intent behind using it is not to minimize or dismiss me based on my gender, I'm not going to worry about it. There is definitely a give and take here and I kind of have to accept trying to see positive intent with people despite it not always being the case. I would hope others do the same for me.

But again, internet lol. There's always going to be someone who wants to argue for the sake of arguing and you have to decide for yourself what you want to do in each problematic situation you encounter. What issue is worth pressing and what is worth closing the message/thread/window and focusing on something else? If you want people to accept your quirks and preferences, what quirks and preferences are you willing to accept of others?