Discussion When I think about what life entails, I want to die. When I think about what death entails, I want to live.

[hurts2b]

When I think about all the practical matters of living (the socializing, the obligations, responsibilities, work) I want to die. I didn't ask to be here. I don't need the stress.

Except when I think about all the panic and pain and discomfort the process of dying puts you through, that doesn't seem worth it.

I don't want to to live. I don't want to go through the process of dying. I just want to be dead. No effort. No pain.

 

[iwkmsssb]

i was just thinking about this, the thought of having to live like this for the rest of my life is unbearable but death is also something that scares me. si is a thing and could make you back out at any time, and the action of even preparing to ctb would need immense effort to plan and go through. and what happens after that? the afterlife is unknown, i just hope its nothing after death. i just don't want to exist anymore.

 

[excusemybrain]

i been thinking like this for like 5 years, i dont even have energy to plan anything and while i do nothing about it i have to keep living and how much more time passes more i wanna die. i just wanted a button to press and go or a gun but even with a gun i would have to plan something

When I think about all the practical matters of living (the socializing, the obligations, responsibilities, work) I want to die. I didn't ask to be here. I don't need the stress.

Except when I think about all the panic and pain and discomfort the process of dying puts you through, that doesn't seem worth it.

I don't want to to live. I don't want to go through the process of dying. I just want to be dead. No effort. No pain.

 

[dirkw83]

I used to think life was about making things as great as possible, but I'm starting to realize it's more about hoping to get through it with as little pain as possible.

 

[hurts2b]

I used to think life was about making things as great as possible, but I'm starting to realize it's more about hoping to get through it with as little pain as possible.

This has been my approach too. It's hard.

 

[TAW122]

When I was younger, I too, had similar experiences too. The SI is indeed one of the most annoying things about sentience itself, hardwired through billions of years of evolution into all living organisms, including humans too.