What's Your Reason for Staying Alive?

[Moonomyth]

Making sure that the people who stopped me the first time regret doing so to the point that they don't stop me the next time.

 

[Beeper]

A small ember of hope that I can turn things around. It often goes dim as the wind blows, but has not gone out completely.

 

[cloudnone]

Honestly, at this point… it's just that I have people that I need to look out for and stick up for. I love them and I'm the only person that'll do it. Once they inevitably move on from my life, I'll probably be gone.

 

[ven]

Immediate family that I'm responsible for. Basically, despite thinking about suicide frequently, the only way it'll happen is if they passed away before me and that's improbable.

 

[seaweaves]

It varies for me, yearly, monthly, daily.

Used to be all and only a matter of guilt ("What if there isn't a hell? What penance do I serve for my past existence and harms other than continuing to live and try to do better?")

Lately it's more the risk of letting people down when I've made commitments to help them, which is guilt adjacent I guess. (This is another reason that, when I'm pulling away from people, I'm aware that I'm at doubled risk, since it's not just isolation but losing that chance to be helpful).

And today, it's because of both (a) mere spite, and (b) an unsolicited compliment I received related to something important to me. Yesterday it was because I had the option to sleep away most of the day, and that was easier than doing anything more active to or with myself. Meanwhile, other days, there is no reason. But I don't always need a reason to live, to live.

Whatever reasons you're looking for right now, I hope they find you in the ways you need!

 

[everydayiloveyou]

I need to outlive my life insurance's suicide clause

 

[cooldude420]

much people wil b very damaged by my deaf

 

[Manaaja]

Survival instict, fear of uncomfort and pain, fear of failure, panic, fear of death, fear of what happens after death, fear of dying alone (can't really ask anyone to help with ctb), lack of good, easy, cheap, simple and easily accessed suicide options, the fact that I can't be open about my desire to ctb (it's much harder to ctb when you have to hide your intentions and attempts and materials).

 

[fox_wannabe]

I think rainbow six siege and walking in forest, plus I want to write graphical novel some day.

 

[youraffection]

I don't want my family and friends to blame themselves. My brother's also been hospitalized, and they're already struggling so much from that.