What is your opinion on self-harm?

[Kotaru Chan]

For a few days now I have been cutting my arms, testing how deep I can go, to endure the pain of cutting all the way to the level of the artery in my wrist. I don't do this to relieve other pains, after all it doesn't work. But to test my resistance. And you? What is your objective? (if you do this...)

 

[carlbot]

I've done very mild cutting as something else to think about rather than life.

 

[Kotaru Chan]

I've done very mild cutting as something else to think about rather than life.

It's interesting to see this from another angle. Thank you.

 

[GhostInTheMachine]

IMO self-harm is a form of self-expression. It's just that in most cases it's an expression of mental pain via physical pain or in others, an attempt to feel something past the numbness most who partake in it suffer. Others do it to get a rush from it. For me, I self-harm in a somewhat ritualistic manner where I push my body physically until it reaches it's limit. I often have to spend days recovering from such exertion but that push is for me to see how far I can push myself before I can't anymore.

Depending on the severity of the harm, I honestly don't blame most people for doing it, but there obviously comes a point where any "productiveness" that could be derived from it gives way to irrecoverable damage. It's only at that point where I would really try to step in to help somebody find a better way to express their pain. Your relationship with cutting reminds me of my relationship with drug use, to test my limits.

 

[Kotaru Chan]

IMO self-harm is a form of self-expression. It's just that in most cases it's an expression of mental pain via physical pain or in others, an attempt to feel something past the numbness most who partake in it suffer. Others do it to get a rush from it. For me, I self-harm in a somewhat ritualistic manner where I push my body physically until it reaches it's limit. I often have to spend days recovering from such exertion but that push is for me to see how far I can push myself before I can't anymore.

Depending on the severity of the harm, I honestly don't blame most people for doing it, but there obviously comes a point where any "productiveness" that could be derived from it gives way to irrecoverable damage. It's only at that point where I would really try to step in to help somebody find a better way to express their pain. Your relationship with cutting reminds me of my relationship with drug use, to test my limits.

That's amazing. Thank you so much for sharing your perspective. And I'm available if you want to talk about your relationship with drug use.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

To test your resistance to what exactly? Pain? That seems pretty pointless. Why do you need to test your resistance?

 

[Cloud Busting]

I used to self harm. It was for emotional regulation purposes. Physical pain has been proven to release beta endorphins in the form of endogenous opioids and for some, this alleviates emotional pain. Some research has actually indicated that otc painkillers can relieve heartache, for example.

It was impulsive for me. I made a mistake, I deserved it. I was anger, I got in a fight, I was overwhelmed? Yep. I can remember getting into fights and ripping my earrings out to scratch myself without even thinking about it. I also would self harm to reduce numbness, but I preferred to burn in those situations. Replacing emotional pain with physical pain was the goal. It was like a pressure valve I had to release before I exploded.

Sometimes it was to spite people, or to feel unique and badass. I can relate to testing limits. It wasn't really badass though, because I couldn't cope with my feelings. I do not recommend it. The feelings one tries to suppress come back ten fold, which makes self harm worse: also wanting to test limits just makes the threshold of what you are willing to do expand to heights you'd never imagine prior.

You aren't the first person I've heard testing limits or seeing if they could go further with actual suicide. I've heard of people who hadn't heard of it before discover self harm that way. Esther in The Bell Jar cuts her calf for the reasons you cited. It's a tale as old as time.

 

[Kotaru Chan]

To test your resistance to what exactly? Pain? That seems pretty pointless. Why do you need to test your resistance?

To have a hemorrhage due to a ruptured artery. I just need a little more courage or resistance.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

To have a hemorrhage due to a ruptured artery. I just need a little more courage or resistance.

Yeah, you should probably rethink your method of choice. Cutting has a very low success rate. You are more likely to just end up with permanent bodily injuries than you are to die by using that method.

 

[Kotaru Chan]

Yeah, you should probably rethink your method of choice. Cutting has a very low success rate. You are more likely to just end up with permanent bodily injuries than you are to die by using that method.

I think you're right actually

 

[GhostInTheMachine]

That's amazing. Thank you so much for sharing your perspective. And I'm available if you want to talk about your relationship with drug use.

No "heavy drugs" per se, but enough psychedelics to make everybody at Woodstock look like lightweights. I pair them with extreme levels of exercise because of the sheer energy rush, otherwise I quickly spiral into a bad trip. Even sober, I don't do well being idle.

 

[Goodfornothingbish]

I've done very mild cutting as something else to think about rather than life.

I agree. I cut so the screaming in my head can stop, the feeling of wanting to cut goes away, or to see if I can feel something but I can't go too deep with a paper sharpener. I know some people are against it but I also hope the dont heal iykwim. I hope that it's slow and I get the pain I deserve.



For everyone:
I hope you find another outlet one day i wish your life wasn't so painful that sh is the only say to stop or feel.

 

[Namelesa]

I cut as a way to lessen feelings of anxiety and emptiness and to punish myself if I feel guilty or shameful about something or when I did something wrong. I also like to use scars as a way to physical show I am in mental pain so I get more attention and maybe sympathy. In terms of opinions on it, I have less of negative opinion on it compared to others as for me its been more positive than negative as I am fine with the scars I have and helped me to cope with painful emotions in life. Obviously not everyone should not be starting this unless they are very sure about it and has risk of infection but I think self harm is seen too negatively, especially as a coping mechanism.

 

[Halfhourdays]

It's sad.

 

[Kotaru Chan]

I cut as a way to lessen feelings of anxiety and emptiness and to punish myself if I feel guilty or shameful about something or when I did something wrong. I also like to use scars as a way to physical show I am in mental pain so I get more attention and maybe sympathy. In terms of opinions on it, I have less of negative opinion on it compared to others as for me its been more positive than negative as I am fine with the scars I have and helped me to cope with painful emotions in life. Obviously not everyone should not be starting this unless they are very sure about it and has risk of infection but I think self harm is seen too negatively, especially as a coping mechanism.

There is a strangely beautiful side to your testimony. I think I identified a little. Thank you.

 

[Forveleth]

It was for emotional regulation purposes. Physical pain has been proven to release beta endorphins in the form of endogenous opioids and for some, this alleviates emotional pain.

This for me. I self harm to stop feeling depressed/anxious. It is just nice to sit back and have the silence in my head for a few minutes. I would not describe it as an endorphin high, but more relief from constantly feeling shitty.

 

[LittleNelson]

I also cut myself - just take a razor to my wrists. I think sometimes when I get so depression I just need to do something and cutting gives me a sense of relief.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I can understand why people do it. I've only ever engaged in pretty mild forms- mostly hitting myself. Still- I think it's like other forms of copes we turn to- alcohol, drugs, porn. I doubt it helps us in the long-run.

 

[Kotaru Chan]

This for me. I self harm to stop feeling depressed/anxious. It is just nice to sit back and have the silence in my head for a few minutes. I would not describe it as an endorphin high, but more relief from constantly feeling shitty.

And how deep are these cuts?

 

[Johnzaga23]

why do women self harm while men mostly dont? or i might be wrong

 

[Kotaru Chan]

why do women self harm while men mostly dont? or i might be wrong

I don't think that's a reality

 

[Johnzaga23]

I don't think that's a reality

i have the image in my mind of the teenage girl who cuts her wrists. I dont have the image of a man or a boy who does that. Unless if men use different kind of self harm. I think men mostly talk bad to themselves, or slap themselves every once in a while.

 

[Kotaru Chan]

i have the image in my mind of the teenage girl who cuts her wrists. I dont have the image of a man or a boy who does that. Unless if men use different kind of self harm. I think men mostly talk bad to themselves, or slap themselves every once in a while.

Maybe men do this in places that can be easily hidden by clothing, after all men are raised to have a huge and abnormal ego.
So even those who cut themselves do so thinking about their physical image afterwards, in the eyes of society.

 

[Goodfornothingbish]

i have the image in my mind of the teenage girl who cuts her wrists. I dont have the image of a man or a boy who does that. Unless if men use different kind of self harm. I think men mostly talk bad to themselves, or slap themselves every once in a while.

bro yes sh does not discriminate this is why representation matters

 

[Johnzaga23]

Maybe men do this in places that can be easily hidden by clothing, after all men are raised to have a huge and abnormal ego.
So even those who cut themselves do so thinking about their physical image afterwards, in the eyes of society.

Maybe. Societal expectations are different in men and women. Is fear of judgement a big ego thing?

 

[Goodfornothingbish]

So even those who cut themselves do so thinking about their physical image afterwards, in the eyes of society.

I do that too as a female. Im constantly thinking about the scaring and the judgement I will get afterwards. I avoid sex because of them. I avoid skirts without leggings. I avoid long sleeves. That's why imo even the smallest cut holds a lot of weight. Now I constantly think about the scaring and that would be there for YEARS! It will bring discomfort to some people if they see it. Its something I will hate forever. Especially the ones on my legs. Its why for the longest I refused to even have pencil sharpeners. If I wanted to sh, id either need to bet my agoraphobia and go buy one. Or try finding something else. Idk why but I don't like it really try new things after I've tried one and liked it. Like ill go to different restaurants with no problem but ill pretty much always get the same things or things in the same realm. Idk but I don't want to try something new afterwards most of the time.

 

[loopa]

Just a great way to relieve stress and clear your head. What's wrong with that? What's the point of the thread?

 

[Kotaru Chan]

Just a great way to relieve stress and clear your head. What's wrong with that? What's the point of the thread

Know your opinions on

 

[funtimes]

That's amazing. Thank you so much for sharing your perspective. And I'm available if you want to talk about your relationship with drug use.

It's hard when your just trying to find relief.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

why do women self harm while men mostly dont? or i might be wrong

Men also self-harm. I don't know where you got this idea that men mostly don't from, but it's wrong. While some research suggests that women SH more than men, other studies have found that there isn't a significant difference in rates of SH amongst men vs women. The ratios shift depending on whether you are looking at clinical studies or general population studies, as women are more likely to turn to psychiatric services for help compared to men. It's also important to take note of how gender norms may impact how self-harm is viewed, leading to SH methods more commonly used by men being brushed off. For example, some men SH through purposely getting into physical altercations in order to harm themselves, but many may not recognize it as being a form of SH due to gender norms. Men are supposed to be tough and dominant and thus physical fighting is seen as men being men and not as a potential sign of something deeper. It is also important to consider the issue of potential underreporting of SH amongst men.