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kappa

kappa

Experienced
Apr 2, 2019
233
Fear.
 
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ShutUpEli

ShutUpEli

I'm sorry
Apr 6, 2021
60
Someone else killing me instead
 
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R

RowdyH999

Student
Mar 17, 2021
136
My case get dropped so I wasn't looking at 20 years in the feds. But that won't happen. Plus it would only delay it, not eliminate me wanting to do it. I still wanna visit many places. Oh well, there's always the next life.
 
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M

meles_inoris

Student
Mar 18, 2020
139
Maybe I'll get murdered someday
 
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Soulless Angel

Soulless Angel

Did someone say Rum?
Jul 6, 2020
1,272
a shit ton of money and a new home in a new location (the latter we are waiting on) but even then it won't take away the self loathing and the pain
 
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E

Emilia1012

Student
Apr 10, 2021
102
Is there is one thing (or several things) that could happen in your life right now, that would prevent you from ctb?

It's also okay to say that, ultimately, nothing will stop you.
If my health would improve
If I would be more apprecciated at work
If my ex would text me something nice

Actually I am seeing my doctor soon, if I get any positive news from him or any plan of treatment that might help I already would be happy
 
Last edited:
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D

disfiguredone

Cursed
Aug 23, 2020
187
I thought for a moment and came up with some answers - money, health, etc

but then I boiled those down to find out what's behind those answers
money - I'm sick of worrying about it, I don't want to be homeless
health - I'm sick of being in pain and I worry about how much more pain, how much longer
mental health - PTSD makes me feel like I'm in serious life or death danger that I cannot escape

its really all about safety it seems

safety - for me to not CTB I would need to feel safe - from becoming homeless, from pain, from the uncontrollable fear

weird, I want to harm myself because I don't feel safe? strange how it doesn't inspire me to try to be safe but inspires me to try to die

right now I'm guessing this is because I don't know how to find a way to feel safe, but I do know how to find a way to die
maybe I believe that it's all inescapable till death, that death is the only way to be safe - nothing can ever hurt me again once I'm dead
I really relate to this.
 
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PoofLoop:P

PoofLoop:P

Member
May 5, 2021
16
Is there is one thing (or several things) that could happen in your life right now, that would prevent you from ctb?

It's also okay to say that, ultimately, nothing will stop you.
The minute men could show up with their time machine, zap me back to my child hood, let me record all the neglect and abuse and then me report it to CPS.
 
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voyager

voyager

Don't you dare go hollow...
Nov 25, 2019
963
Regaining my health. Physically, mentally, and appearance wise. It's all intertwined and affecting one another. But short of benign aliens with advanced technology showing up, it's not gonna happen.

Otoh, what might not have prevented my suicide entirely but at least postponed it would've been constant, legal access to effective means to ctb. Fact, society.
 
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J

Jack'sPain

Member
Jun 15, 2021
59
I'll go chronological reverse from now a few thigs I can mention in exhaustion

1 my mother stop hating me & love. Me like before
2 my brother eithr not going to us aftr ripping me off, 3 months ago or coming back now
3 eithr my fathr not taking me out colg to destroy my lyf or I go now to west & cmplt
4 eithr fathr didnt hide & provid all family mney to brthr, ovr d years, or now I can get to mak up for all of it,
5 I could fulfill my weak grandfathr's hopes of my success, and tak him out of the hous of uncaring family
.... More later maybe

I guess you said one thing so I think 1 thing would be a huge lot of money to fix/mend other problms
 
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Callie Arcale

Callie Arcale

It’s a tale told by an idiot signifying nothing
Feb 10, 2021
852
Wake up one day and not feel crushing anxiety nor complete exhaustion.
 
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All Things Must Pass

All Things Must Pass

Mage
Apr 14, 2021
557
Death
Incarceration
Magically getting back my eyesight.
 
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W

Wisdom3_1-9

he/him/his
Jul 19, 2020
1,939
If the person who ruined my life would reverse course and set things right, I *might* be okay. I can't be certain. Enough damage has already been caused that it might be irreversible. Nonetheless, it's the only real path forward for me. It's all in his hands, and I have absolutely zero faith that he will ever do it.
 
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hʚll

hʚll

not real.
Jun 18, 2021
467
nothing. never being born would help but i guess that's not possible..
 
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ClownMe

ClownMe

Don't Cry for Me, I'm Already Dead
Apr 7, 2021
20,561
nothing
 
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N

N2Narcosis

Member
Jun 5, 2021
58
Is there is one thing (or several things) that could happen in your life right now, that would prevent you from ctb?

It's also okay to say that, ultimately, nothing will stop you.
If I won the lottery and had the money to do what I want, it could substantially delay my suicide.

Alternatively if I suddenly gained some magical powers so I could shed this useless body, that could also delay my suicide.
 
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PeacePlease

PeacePlease

A wandering body without a heart
Feb 26, 2019
49
Nothing material I guess. Just be able to not have this horrible anxyiety and recover my brain which is damaged after antidepressant usage. Oh and have friends :)
 
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brutalus

brutalus

Student
Jun 14, 2021
159
this is a very interesting thread.

so many of us suffer for love. i fucking hate it. i say im over it because zoloft helps me, but deep down my biggest wish would be to have love.

as for OPs question: if the world descends into apocalyptic chaos i would like to stay and witness it.
one more thing that ive always wanted so much, but never had enough money or a woman: a child :(
 
Last edited:
CatTheBus5689

CatTheBus5689

Member
Jun 22, 2021
76
Maybe if the right person told me they don't want me to leave, but that's never going to happen.

I'm going to take my feelings to my grave with me.
 
N

noname223

Archangel
Aug 18, 2020
5,851
Winning the lottery or finding a rich gf lol
 
meetapple

meetapple

Mage
Jun 3, 2021
585
Is there is one thing (or several things) that could happen in your life right now, that would prevent you from ctb?

It's also okay to say that, ultimately, nothing will stop you.
Is there is one thing (or several things) that could happen in your life right now, that would prevent you from ctb?

It's also okay to say that, ultimately, nothing will stop you.
If I had a normal youth and had integrated myself into society properly and didn't screw up my education I might not want to CTB.
 

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