what is it like having bipolar disorder?

[Not_A_Seagull]

also why do mentally ill people have kids

 

[lionetta12]

also why do mentally ill people have kids

I don't know how it's like to be bipolar, but from the people I help who have bipolar disorders, it does not sound like a pleasant existance. Depends on what mental illness you have, some disorders run in the family and so there can be a high risk for your children to get certain ones like bipolar disoder if you and other family members have it, in that case, I wouldn't personally want to have kids if I had anything that could be passed down to them, as I see how much people suffer with those illnesses daily.

 

[ctbgurl]

also why do mentally ill people have kids

It's exhausting. One moment I feel remotely ok and the next I feel violent and disturbed. It's an uncontrollable switch that's constantly fluctuating and it's extremely depressing. Personally, no medications have helped me and i'm currently just living with the way I feel. Another one of the reasons I'd like to CTB.

 

[tiredone]

also why do mentally ill people have kids

Personally i did not know i had mh problems until recent 6 years or so( my mum was mentally ill, but where i come from, you dont talk about these things - which shows how stupid it is, causing only more suffering, hence i was not aware about it). Already had 2 kids by then. I am not having more.

 

[nosoul]

It's exhausting. One moment I feel remotely ok and the next I feel violent and disturbed. It's an uncontrollable switch that's constantly fluctuating and it's extremely depressing. Personally, no medications have helped me and i'm currently just living with the way I feel. Another one of the reasons I'd like to CTB.

Feel the same way, I've done too much damage and my brain is barely working:(

 

[Holu]

I'm BP2 AKA the pussy Bipolar. As such I'm not really all that overly impulsive, but I still get periods of mania usually for like 5 days. I'm already sadistic so I literally sit there going thru a mixture of extreme sadism and joy. I sit there laughing thinking about the feelings of ripping into another's flesh. Occasionally, I'll feel brief moments of fear or guilt, and sometimes a serious depression but it fades pretty quick. Thankfully I'm not very impulsive so I don't act on it but I tend to still do dumb things like SH or mildly attack people. When I'm not manic(which is normally) I feel like utter shit. Honestly following my mania try to reenter it to no success. That person or side of me scares me shitless but there's something exhilarating about it.

 

[tiredangelgirl]

it feels unpredictable. when I feel "happy" I feel absolutely unstoppable. my manic periods used to be full of drug use, unprotected sex, dumping whoever I was dating at the time, spending all my money etc

as I got sober and found help, now my manic periods look like cleaning my entire apartment top to bottom, barely any sleep, going to the gym everyday for 4 hours. just endless energy and feeling the most AMAZING feeling confidence. you have 0 worries, kind of a god complex, you don't exactly think of the consequences.

and then the depressive periods feel that much worse. I can't get out of bed, I'll feel like I weigh 600 lbs. it takes all my energy to do anything. during these times it's really hard for me to shower, so I use a lot of baby wipes and take care of myself as best as I can. i've lived with this for years so i'm slowly learning ways to avoid problems. for example i wax all my body hair so it makes taking showers and having to shave less daunting. a lot of my life is figuring out lil life hacks for when i'm depressed af.

these are just the tips of examples. not even including my emotions during these times too but it sucks. there's never a middle period. i've tried tons of meds. one day i'll feel in love with life and then the next i'll be suicidal. there's so much to it and everyone's varies. I will never ever have kids. i'm mentally i'll along with other issues so I could never put that onto a kid. I don't understand why people put it onto kids. they don't think and they want children for selfish reasons usually

 

[protecttransyouth]

I have bp1. Been diagnosed for 4 or 5 years? I go through extreme periods of mania. Delusions, paranoia, lack of apatite, no need for much sleep, increased sex drive and risky sexual behaviors, and often it leads into psychosis. Usually I black out and ruin my life in manic episodes. Then it's followed by a depressive episode. Can't get out of bed, extreme low mood, no sel care, tired all the time, struggle with basic tasks, low focus, low energy. Each cycle lasts weeks to months.

 

[nosoul]

it feels unpredictable. when I feel "happy" I feel absolutely unstoppable. my manic periods used to be full of drug use, unprotected sex, dumping whoever I was dating at the time, spending all my money etc

as I got sober and found help, now my manic periods look like cleaning my entire apartment top to bottom, barely any sleep, going to the gym everyday for 4 hours. just endless energy and feeling the most AMAZING feeling confidence. you have 0 worries, kind of a god complex, you don't exactly think of the consequences.

and then the depressive periods feel that much worse. I can't get out of bed, I'll feel like I weigh 600 lbs. it takes all my energy to do anything. during these times it's really hard for me to shower, so I use a lot of baby wipes and take care of myself as best as I can. i've lived with this for years so i'm slowly learning ways to avoid problems. for example i wax all my body hair so it makes taking showers and having to shave less daunting. a lot of my life is figuring out lil life hacks for when i'm depressed af.

these are just the tips of examples. not even including my emotions during these times too but it sucks. there's never a middle period. i've tried tons of meds. one day i'll feel in love with life and then the next i'll be suicidal. there's so much to it and everyone's varies. I will never ever have kids. i'm mentally i'll along with other issues so I could never put that onto a kid. I don't understand why people put it onto kids. they don't think and they want children for selfish reasons usually

It saddens me that I won't have kids, who would want then with bpd, I'm just gonna ctb soon,I will apologize in my note,but I will let them know my illness got the best of me. But given where I am, a busy hotel,I need ctb to work, and need my damn SN to get here.
My mania has destroyed my life, then the bipolar meds destroyed my nervous system, then I tried using psychedelics to heal from the damage and it destroyed my brain. So now it is ctb time.