I have them in my kitchen cupboard too - sometimes I can't stop thinking about them there, calling my name.
I always just remind myself that this isn't something to be rushed. I'm sure you've seen the SN threads where people have dived in without a lot of consideration beforehand and ended up in quite bad situations. You have your entire lifetime to get this right, so kick back with some gaming tonight and then get some rest, and then consider your options and maybe think about starting your meto if the time is right.
I know how hard it is when you feel like one more night is one too many. Whatever you decide to do, stay smart and safe x