
Spazsticatednoodle
Member
- Dec 12, 2024
- 22
My reasons for still being here is fear of dying which I imagine is a lot of us here and my friends they make life a lot more barbel for me
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Out of curiosity, how does you being an efilist mean that you shouldn't partake in any life affirming activities? I'm also an efilist but I merely see efilism as "the dissection of life" as efil blaise succinctly states.Cognitive dissonance. If I was truly an efilist I would not partake in any life affirming activities I have control over such as eating/drinking, hygiene, pleasure seeking, etc. etc. etc.
Thanatos is unable to overcome eros (and vice versa) because of neurological/biological/social/societal factors.
I am sick of typing. This is meaningless anyways.
I feel that if I am to be serious about my beliefs I should act in accordance to them. Naturally others will have differing views of efilism.I don't have access to any suicide methods that I know is reliable enough for it to work. At this point, I am desperate enough to ctb even if it's via a painful method but the issue is that the current accessible suicide methods aren't really reliable (aside from SN but I don't think I can access that due to my overprotective parents).
Out of curiosity, how does you being an efilist mean that you shouldn't partake in any life affirming activities? I'm also an efilist but I merely see efilism as "the dissection of life" as efil blaise succinctly states.
i relate to that so heavily, plz stay stronghonestly, i keep going just because i love suicide and mental illness. i keep myself sick because of this unfortunately.
Finding a reason would be nice.I don't know. It's a couple of things, one being that I want to try to minimize the impact of my death by dying somewhere away from people who know me well, and the other is the hope that I will find some reason to live - although I cannot help but feel that my time is running out for that.
What exactly are your beliefs if I may ask? Could you elaborate further?I feel that if I am to be serious about my beliefs I should act in accordance to them. Naturally others will have differing views of efilism.
How do you define the dissection of life? I find your phrasing interesting.
Same here. How long have you been in this position? Have you set a date and/or age where you've decided that you'll attempt regardless of whether or not the feeling of readiness has come back yet? I can't imagine spinning my wheels endlessly like this...I have found that attempts are most likely to succeed if I feel "ready". Unfortunately, that feeling hasn't come for me in a while and I'm not sure why. I'm still extremely depressed and can't wait for my life to be over but yet every time I think about setting up for my method I'm just kind of "meh". I have little projects around the house to work on, so maybe that's why? However I feel if someone barged in and put a gun to my head I would be totally ok with them pulling the trigger.
I do not know why I cannot seem to bring myself to do it so I just keep existing until my brain decides I'm ready.
Big fear of mineFear that after a suicide attempt their evil ER hospital will bring me back to life but with brain damage