After years of searching, googling, checking on Amazon and every site I could find, every chemical supplier in the country, sources recommended on here, sausage curing stores, aquarium supply stores and even Etsy I have not been able to find a reputable source of SN that ships to New Zealand. Honestly thinking of taking the last few hundred dollars I have left and moving to Australia just so I can get some. I tried so hard to get SN after failing the tourniquet method about 20 times, 2 paracetamol overdoses and the time I tried to die by drinking eucalyptus oil. (Can't reccomend the paracetamol that shit is nasty)
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FuneralCry
Just wanting some peace
- Sep 24, 2020
- 46,743
That sounds so horrific going through all those failed attempts, that's what I fear, trying to ctb and just ending up back here. But yes, paracetamol is well known to be an unreliable method. It must be so frustrating being in that situation, I certainly hate this world where we have to struggle so much in finding ways to finally die, it really shouldn't be so difficult for people to find a reliable way to leave this existence behind and it's so wrong how it can be.
Feeling trapped here with no way out really can be such an incredibly tiring and awful situation to be in, and the complications, risks and difficulties involved in suicide is the only reason as to why I still exist. It's just so incredibly unfair and it sounds like you've suffered a lot so I hope that you eventually find the freedom that you wish for.
Being through what I've been through, seeing what I have seen, euthanasia that is peaceful and available to all would feel like the most merciful thing you could ever imagine to me. I'm worried about people with disabilities being coerced into it by unsupportive family or covert eugenicists though idk how it could be made coercion proof but I know so many injuries and suffering from failed attempts could be prevented too. Disability support and adequate benefits are so important, even if society never gets around to a peaceful exit for all who actually want it. I think Canada allows some people with mental illness to apply for MAiD don't they? In New Zealand only those with a diagnosed terminal illness that will kill them anyway within 6 months can apply for euthanasia. Even someone with Huntington's or ALS would likely be excluded. And what about women/POC who are less likely to be able to get a proper diagnosis for a condition they may be suffering from? It's as though the government thinks that everyone has the money to go round getting a second opinion when the public system fails them.
sheepgirl
Student
- Aug 11, 2018
- 119
I'm in New Zealand too and trying to find it :/ it's so hard. I tried to end it twice last year by drinking ethylene glycol, I was found though and ended up in icu for 5 days each time. I don't have plans to end it anytime soon but I want the SN on hand for when I am ready. I don't want to be trapped into another horrific attempt that might not work. If I ever find a source that ships to NZ I'll update this thread
I have never heard of ethylene glycol as a method. That must have been awful. Solidarity as I know how hard it is when not a lot of companies will ship SN here. Some days I wonder if I should become an SN seller just so people here can have access to SN too. Though if I actually had SN in front of me I'd be taking it before I even had time to set up the website!
StarFaded
Member
- Aug 24, 2022
- 79
The only seller I could find that ships here was IC, but I saw a thread where someone used SN from there, did everything right and still didn't manage to ctb so I'm having a bit of a hard time trustig them as a seller
StarFaded
Member
- Aug 24, 2022
- 79
Oh no could you link me to the thread? I saw another regular NZ user who appeared to have bought from IC, said they were going to use the SN and then stopped posting after that. I assume they were successful in their attempt and was genuinely happy for them.
Tbh I'm pretty desperate for SN and might still order from IC anyway.....
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/failed-sn-not-sure-why.92077/
This might not mean that IC is definitely a scam, some goodbye threads on here are from people using IC SN but it has made me a bit wary.Similar threads
Venting I had an SN connection & lost it, now I'm certain I want to ctb & don't know how to replace it- ScornedStoic
- Suicide Discussion
Suicide Discussionfinasteride_end
