Venting doesn't help anymore

[Un-]

There's only so much you can do. After a while, it doesn't alleviate any suffering. After a while, you're just a broken vinyl disk, saying the same shit over, and over and over again.

I guess it's.. Like suffering so much, that you're speechless. Maybe it's life's hint that I should end it. There's nothing to hold onto anymore. Nothing.

 

[akirat9]

it not work me either i stop long time before

 

[On Replay]

it not work me either i stop long time before

You're still here. How was your SN experience ? If you're okay with me asking, I want to go out with that method

 

[Hope:-)]

I definitely relate and think about that quite often- when I was younger I would talk about things and feel a little better. Now it never makes me feel better because what I want to change is unfixable. I can't accept what has happened and the ramifications this has had for my future and the suffering is now unrelenting. Knowing I can leave feels me with a little peace but also fear x

 

[CTB Dream]

Venting saying thing not help only repeat process thus life cruelty, tell you thing life full cruel end death what alleviate pain temporary ctb permanent all loop vent not work everything else stop work time move. Wish vent help injury help trauma all word not work damage never go

 

[FuneralCry]

It never helped me in the first place. There is nothing to be achieved by opening up about suffering, at least for me. In this life there is no relief from our misery, we cannot escape from ourselves unless we die. I'm tired of the same thoughts which I have every day. But focusing on how horrible life is, is the most bearable thing for me. Forced optimism and toxic positivity makes me feel way worse. In life most things just make me feel worse. I simply dislike living, life itself will always be the problem no matter what.

 

[Un-]

it not work me either i stop long time before

Lately, I've been more and more confused. What's in me is misery. But there's so much, I can't describe it. I can't describe why. I can't see a solution.

I definitely relate and think about that quite often- when I was younger I would talk about things and feel a little better. Now it never makes me feel better because what I want to change is unfixable. I can't accept what has happened and the ramifications this has had for my future and the suffering is now unrelenting. Knowing I can leave feels me with a little peace but also fear x

It's paralysing.. You're in this position where the road ahead is filled with pain. You know it's filled with pain. There's no good option, anymore. There's no mitigating anything. You messed up. Leaving is the best thing you can do for yourself. Sigh.

Venting saying thing not help only repeat process thus life cruelty, tell you thing life full cruel end death what alleviate pain temporary ctb permanent all loop vent not work everything else stop work time move. Wish vent help injury help trauma all word not work damage never go

I wish it were easier to leave. If I had my hands on something like nembutal, I'd be dead a long time ago. When your life is about surviving one day at a time.. Having no friends, no one close to you at all, no job, no purpose, nothing to escape your life with.. Life isn't worth living. Life won't get better.

I wonder to myself how an ordinary person must feel. I'm sure they're sleeping right now. Or maybe they're worried about tomorrow because of a school assignment, or a project for work that they have to complete. None of them are crying like I am. None of them are wondering where they went wrong.. Why they were born with such shit genes and in a terrible environment. None of them are thinking about what would happen if they left.

 

[Fadeawaaaay]

I hear you. I thought about and talked about every possible facet of any of this.

 

[whatevs]

The solution to the problem has never been words, but action. Either that desperately sought after action that starts a chain of events that will make life worthwhile, or embracing death.

 

[Starryeyes]

I used to vent all the time through social media but realised it doesn't actually help me. I stopped doing it. I feel like when I was venting I might of actually wanted help or comfort or a solution and now I don't. People would of expected my suicide back then

 

[Cerulea]

There's only so much you can do. After a while, it doesn't alleviate any suffering. After a while, you're just a broken vinyl disk, saying the same shit over, and over and over again.

I guess it's.. Like suffering so much, that you're speechless. Maybe it's life's hint that I should end it. There's nothing to hold onto anymore. Nothing.

Word. I can't talk my way out of this trap anymore. That ship has sailed. It's interesting, though, on days like today when I'm emotional and feeling destroyed, I feel a desperation to put that down somewhere. I lost my best friend and so I keep it all self contained. I'm not under the impression that it would help anything in any tangible way to discuss it all. But, like, I remember what companionship felt like and it wasn't all dog shit all the time.

 

[foreverfalling]

For me it has never really helped. I've never had anyone in real life to talk about things to, no one I could trust to help me. I decided to try writing stuff on the internet because that's where I spent all my time. It wasn't so much as trying to help myself, I've never believed random strangers on the internet would help me. It was more to help other people perhaps, share my experiences, and give other people something to read. Maybe there's someone out there that feels lonely, reads what I have to say and thinks yeah I agree, nice to see someone else think the same.

 

[Un-]

The solution to the problem has never been words, but action. Either that desperately sought after action that starts a chain of events that will make life worthwhile, or embracing death.

You're right. And it depresses me. I can barely get out of my bed in the morning. I don't have nearly what it takes to change my life for the better. I don't even have the right attitude. If you think about suicide for so long, the idea of trying to live is sickening.. It bothers you..

I used to vent all the time through social media but realised it doesn't actually help me. I stopped doing it. I feel like when I was venting I might of actually wanted help or comfort or a solution and now I don't. People would of expected my suicide back then

I'd imagine it's not too different from telling anyone your problems, too. Most of the time, they don't understand. It makes no difference to be mute. You'll suffer the same in this instance anyway.

For me it has never really helped. I've never had anyone in real life to talk about things to, no one I could trust to help me. I decided to try writing stuff on the internet because that's where I spent all my time. It wasn't so much as trying to help myself, I've never believed random strangers on the internet would help me. It was more to help other people perhaps, share my experiences, and give other people something to read. Maybe there's someone out there that feels lonely, reads what I have to say and thinks yeah I agree, nice to see someone else think the same.

I used to think this way. But in such a large world, or even such a large forum as this, someone's bound to say what you were gonna say.

And I'm such a depressed bag of fuck, that I doubt anyone relates to me at all. Vaguely, probably, but not more than that. More than once, I felt like never posting here again because of how.. Worthless my voice is. Sigh.

 

[toasterbath]

And I'm such a depressed bag of fuck, that I doubt anyone relates to me at all. Vaguely, probably, but not more than that. More than once, I felt like never posting here again because of how.. Worthless my voice is. Sigh.

hey i can relate to everything you've been saying. i'm the biggest depressed bag of fuck. just drifting through the wind empty. your voice is not worthless.

 

[Littlewittlelight]

You're right. And it depresses me. I can barely get out of my bed in the morning. I don't have nearly what it takes to change my life for the better. I don't even have the right attitude. If you think about suicide for so long, the idea of trying to live is sickening.. It bothers you..


I'd imagine it's not too different from telling anyone your problems, too. Most of the time, they don't understand. It makes no difference to be mute. You'll suffer the same in this instance anyway.


I used to think this way. But in such a large world, or even such a large forum as this, someone's bound to say what you were gonna say.

And I'm such a depressed bag of fuck, that I doubt anyone relates to me at all. Vaguely, probably, but not more than that. More than once, I felt like never posting here again because of how.. Worthless my voice is. Sigh.

When I joined I tried to do the same I did sometimes on social media venting but it really doesn't help. even today I feel like posting because something happened again was my mistake again but no shit anymore because when you are done you are done. I must not be the same as you but when I post I just do it and I know my voice is worthless too and it would never matter. that's the first thing I try to remember but I always get deflected still what you said this venting doesn't matter when you know you can't even move. This isn't going top help this is just coping and some of are in that phase. This is really close to either another breakdown or cbt itself. You say meaningful things here which are to the point always. I wanted to be like this too but I haven't reached there yet maybe I could someday. You talk to the point.

 

[foreverfalling]

And I'm such a depressed bag of fuck, that I doubt anyone relates to me at all. Vaguely, probably, but not more than that. More than once, I felt like never posting here again because of how.. Worthless my voice is. Sigh.

No one in this world can understand anyone else entirely. At least as people that feel this way, we can try to support each other. If you never posted, then no one will ever know you existed, that you have these thoughts. However miniscule, your words will have an effect, your interactions mean something. I frequently get reactions from you on my posts, which I appreciate.