reznikoff

reznikoff

Despondent
Jan 13, 2019
43
okay, so I just want to vent for a sec. this is more for me than anything, don't mean to put this out here and clog the forums. hope my little vent isn't too troublesome.

i recently got out of an abusive relationship. i live with BPD, so things aren't easy for me as is, but my ex's incessant manipulation and gaslighting put me in a cycle of hell for a year. i put my life on hold for him and he would use me up until i had nothing left. all my friends watched my deterioration but i insisted i was happy. i wasn't.

and as bad as it sounds, I've gotten into a new relationship. it's only been like a month since my ex and i split. my new boyfriend is nice. i like him a lot. he's tall, he's quiet, he's cool. good guy all around. but i can't help but feel guilty. is it wrong for me to have moved on so quickly? i haven't even moved on, honestly. it feels weird being in a new relationship after living romantically with someone for a whole year of my life. it's so foreign. i don't know how to act in a new relationship, lol. my heart is hurting, and is very confused.

i just... i dunno. my studies aren't doing so great, either. i used to have such a passion for filmmaking, but as of late i have lost my love. my video & film courses seem more of a chore than anything now. i feel like giving up. i get that lack of motivation is just something i have to soldier through in life no matter what. but i'm at the point where i'm reconsidering taking these classes next year. i've got premature senioritis.

on top of that, a friend of mine of 4+ years recently had a falling out with me. yikes. things are wild these days, folks.
 
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Pupuce

Pupuce

Nobody exists on purpose. Come ctb
Apr 19, 2019
282
Hi. Congrats on getting out of that bad relationship. From what I understood, I wouldn't say you have moved on too quickly, more like you had finished the other one a long time before and just had to deal with someone you didn't like for a while.
For your interest in filmmaking, it's ok to realize something isn't as great as you thought it would be, or made for you. I'd like to tell go study something else (took me three years before finding a major I liked so it's totally doable, at least in Europe) but it might not be that easy.
I hope I helped, or at least wasn't boring.
 
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Severen

Severen

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,819
okay, so I just want to vent for a sec. this is more for me than anything, don't mean to put this out here and clog the forums. hope my little vent isn't too troublesome.

i recently got out of an abusive relationship. i live with BPD, so things aren't easy for me as is, but my ex's incessant manipulation and gaslighting put me in a cycle of hell for a year. i put my life on hold for him and he would use me up until i had nothing left. all my friends watched my deterioration but i insisted i was happy. i wasn't.

and as bad as it sounds, I've gotten into a new relationship. it's only been like a month since my ex and i split. my new boyfriend is nice. i like him a lot. he's tall, he's quiet, he's cool. good guy all around. but i can't help but feel guilty. is it wrong for me to have moved on so quickly? i haven't even moved on, honestly. it feels weird being in a new relationship after living romantically with someone for a whole year of my life. it's so foreign. i don't know how to act in a new relationship, lol. my heart is hurting, and is very confused.

i just... i dunno. my studies aren't doing so great, either. i used to have such a passion for filmmaking, but as of late i have lost my love. my video & film courses seem more of a chore than anything now. i feel like giving up. i get that lack of motivation is just something i have to soldier through in life no matter what. but i'm at the point where i'm reconsidering taking these classes next year. i've got premature senioritis.

on top of that, a friend of mine of 4+ years recently had a falling out with me. yikes. things are wild these days, folks.

I would say, if you moved on so quickly after being with your ex for like 4 or 5 years, then yeah, something is definitely wrong with you. But after one year? Meh. Being with someone for one year only is probably just the result of lust and not love. I can't even have feelings for someone I've been with for only a year because you can't really get to know someone in just one year... People are more complex, than that.
 
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