Discussion too depressed to even ctb?

[Vertigo]

anyone else feel this way? I literally don't want to do anything and i'm so unmotivated that even just looking for ways to ctb seems like a shore.

 

[pole]

i think i'm just too tired and mentally and physically exhausted to do anything; whether it's live life and try and get better or create a ctb plan. both take energy that i don't have.

i feel like i'm just waiting for that one thing to come along, push me to the edge and give me the urge to ctb. and till then, i'm just gonna be crawled up in bed.

 

[Walilamdzi]

I can barely get out of bed at the moment and I don't see that changing...

 

[AcornUnderground]

I'm too sick and depressed to move. I lay here and then the panic sets in. I'm falling apart and can't move forward at all. I'm trapped in a failing, painful body and don't know how to leave. I have methods but just ...can't leave life. It's torture.

 

[SleeplessSoul]

100%. I wish I had just gone through with it when my antidepressants properly kicked in last year and I got so much energy. I've been feeling so crap lately I haven't even been able to face being on here

 

[deadpixels]

Sometimes even writing here is exhausting... I look at all the methods and every one of them involves buying something or too much planning... I often find myself at the ground, paralyzed, the world moving around me. When I finally manage to stand up, I realize that now I'm older, thetime has passed yet I didn't experience anything. I've lived most of my life like this... I was alive but I never lived.

I think I went far away from the subject of the thread, didn't I?

 

[Painless_end]

What happened to OP ? Their name is crossed out.

Did they self ban for CTB or got banned by admin ? I can't get any information by clicking their profile either.

 

[Slow85]

I can relate to this. Infact I've commented to my mental health team about the only thing stopping me is that Im to depressed
I'm having to be watched whilst they increase my medication because of getting the energy to then CTB

and by watched I mean contacted occasionally by the MHT at home with no support Thats the UK for you !

 

[Enough]

Can't even get out of bed...it seems everything requires a huge effort.

 

[Schweppes]

Sometimes even writing here is exhausting... I look at all the methods and every one of them involves buying something or too much planning... I often find myself at the ground, paralyzed, the world moving around me. When I finally manage to stand up, I realize that now I'm older, thetime has passed yet I didn't experience anything. I've lived most of my life like this... I was alive but I never lived.

I think I went far away from the subject of the thread, didn't I?

I have the same thing happen to me! Glad I'm not alone

 

[BaconCheeseburger]

Currently lying in bed crying my eyes out but can't even get up to write out the will kit I bought or watch a 60 second video on how to tie a slipknot. It's debilitating

 

[Nem]

Yep, I barely have energy to get out of bed and life is just passing me by. This all started when I went back on meds and if I had known things would've turned out like this I would've steered clear of them.
I have no choice but to ctb and it takes energy and planning which is basically impossible but again I have no choice
Peace/hugs

 

[SleeplessSoul]

I can relate to this. Infact I've commented to my mental health team about the only thing stopping me is that Im to depressed
I'm having to be watched whilst they increase my medication because of getting the energy to then CTB

and by watched I mean contacted occasionally by the MHT at home with no support Thats the UK for you !

Tell me about it! I'm lucky that I have a good psychologist and we still have weekly sessions, but last time I was referred to the crisis team they rang me up and asked me if I was going to harm myself that night. I said I wasn't and they discharged immediately.

 

[friendly99]

Depression makes me want to procrastinate and that includes ctb

 

[Slow85]

Tell me about it! I'm lucky that I have a good psychologist and we still have weekly sessions, but last time I was referred to the crisis team they rang me up and asked me if I was going to harm myself that night. I said I wasn't and they discharged immediately.

The crisis team are abysmal. Sometimes I feel for them because I know they are overworked , underpaid with huge caseloads , but then I remember that doesn't mean you have to be a prick .....
I have NEVER met a decent crisis team
Member and I think I've been under them 3-4 time's. It's a service that needs a serious shake up. It's a dangerous service with no benefit to anyone that I can see?

 

[joshe]

Where is OP, what happened if they had no energy?

 

[BitterlyAlive]

Everything is overwhelming. Like someone else wrote, even reading this forum, writing responses, and researching is too much right now. I can't really do much of anything.

It's going to be fun when I have my assessment done and have to talk about suicide.