D

dominodux

Member
Nov 11, 2019
55
Good Morning
Is it normal to start second guessing?
I'm not afraid to CTB I'm scared of the unknown.
What if I vomit?
What if my parents hear me?
Will I go to Hell?
Should I wait till I'm alone?
I know I will not call for help I hate hospitals
What if Quetiapine isn't strong enough of antiemetic
I got to do this!!!

I ask that ya'll be with me here every step until it's time to go!
I'll start my fast this afternoon
I plan on laying down on my bedroom floor so I don't make any noise. I will have extra cup ready in case I vomit

If you have so many doubts, i can just suggest you to wait, postpone, till you feel 100% sure and really see no alternatives.

This is just my 10 cents contribute.

I do not want to influence anyone, that may have his problems and hit motivations.
 
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reapandsow918

reapandsow918

Let the waves take me
Nov 6, 2019
191
Hopefully you don't vomit my friend. Good luck!
 
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J

jgm63

Visionary
Oct 28, 2019
2,467
Wishing you a safe journey if you decide to proceed.
If you proceed, then it won't be the unknown, you'll be going home (it's just that we forget where we came from when we're here).
You won't go to hell.
Everything will be okay.

If you change your mind, then that's fine also.

:heart:
 
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Essence

Essence

Nothingness is the beginning of Everything.
Nov 7, 2019
203
@metalchic_74 Whatever you decide, I wish you peace and calm. If you decide to go, I believe that we all go to the same place. So, we will all be together beyond this realm when our time comes. For your journey to this place, my heart is with you for company. If you decide this is not the time, I wish light and contentment in this life, so that you may smile throughout :heart:
 
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Jean4

Jean4

Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
Apr 28, 2019
7,557
I am in New York. Nothing wrong with changing your mind. We love and support you no matter what.
 
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MaybeMaybeKnot

MaybeMaybeKnot

No ctrl-z when you ctb
Oct 25, 2019
339
Greetings. Checking in from Central. I'll be around tonight to keep you company. Any guess what time (ish there's no rush) so I'm not late?
 
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metalchic_74

metalchic_74

Gone Girl
Oct 26, 2019
260
how long u plan to fast, hours
8 hours
Greetings. Checking in from Central. I'll be around tonight to keep you company. Any guess what time (ish there's no rush) so I'm not late?
Prob between 10-11
Just ate lunch this is gonna suck fasting for 8 hours I know my parents are gonna ask why I'm not eating dinner :hihi:
 
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deathbyginger

deathbyginger

Student
Oct 24, 2019
114
I've been following many of your posts on this forum, and it in a way saddens to see you going.
But I hope you find yourself in a happier and more peaceful state :)
I'm sure you will pass in harmony, don't worry about any mishaps as you clearly have this well planned out and researched.
You're an intelligent individual capable of performing this right.
But even with that being said, it's not too late to back out at any point. Don't feel pressured even if you had prepared to. The most important thing is feeling at peace with it.
I wish you best of luck, @metalchic_74 :hug:
Keep in touch as the time approaches
 
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metalchic_74

metalchic_74

Gone Girl
Oct 26, 2019
260
I've been following many of your posts on this forum, and it in a way saddens to see you going.
But I hope you find yourself in a happier and more peaceful state :)
I'm sure you will pass in harmony, don't worry about any mishaps as you clearly have this well planned out and researched.
You're an intelligent individual capable of performing this right.
But even with that being said, it's not too late to back out at any point. Don't feel pressured even if you had prepared to. The most important thing is feeling at peace with it.
I wish you best of luck, @metalchic_74 :hug:
Keep in touch as the time approaches
Thank you :heart:
 
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SinisterKid

SinisterKid

Visionary
Jun 1, 2019
2,113
The only pressure on you to proceed is the pressure you exert on yourself. No one here thinks any the less of you if you decide the time is not right. Do whats right for you, screw the rest of us, its not about us.
 
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Marctic

Marctic

Student
Oct 18, 2019
109
I hope you find peace
 
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Time

Time

Looking to leave.
Nov 10, 2019
264
Good Morning
Is it normal to start second guessing?
I'm not afraid to CTB I'm scared of the unknown.
What if I vomit?
What if my parents hear me?
Will I go to Hell?
Should I wait till I'm alone?
I know I will not call for help I hate hospitals
What if Quetiapine isn't strong enough of antiemetic
I got to do this!!!

I ask that ya'll be with me here every step until it's time to go!
I'll start my fast this afternoon
I plan on laying down on my bedroom floor so I don't make any noise. I will have extra cup ready in case I vomit

I think that all of those thoughts & feelings are completely normal. I've been dealing with them for a while now. It sounds like you're ready & if you have to do it tonight, I hope that everything goes the way you want it to. I'm over in NJ so I'll be awake & following/supporting the process as you post.

I've enjoyed your posts in the short time I've been here. Thank you for sharing with & being here for us. ❤
 
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metalchic_74

metalchic_74

Gone Girl
Oct 26, 2019
260

Man my step mom is making roast beef for dinner. I'm gonna be starving ugh :I
 
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Goneforgood

Goneforgood

Member
Nov 15, 2019
22
[QUOTE = "metalchic_74, post: 476406, membro: 11588"]
[MEDIA = youtube] WEQnzs8wl6E [/ MEDIA]
Amico, la mia matrigna sta preparando un arrosto di manzo per cena. Farò morire di fame ugh :IO
[/ CITAZIONE

Una delle mie canzoni preferite ❤️ Qualsiasi decisione prendi questa sera, saremo con te ... Ti auguro di realizzare i tuoi desideri, saremo con te ❤️❤️
 
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metalchic_74

metalchic_74

Gone Girl
Oct 26, 2019
260
[QUOTE = "metalchic_74, post: 476406, membro: 11588"]
[MEDIA = youtube] WEQnzs8wl6E [/ MEDIA]
Amico, la mia matrigna sta preparando un arrosto di manzo per cena. Farò morire di fame ugh :IO
[/ CITAZIONE

Una delle mie canzoni preferite ❤ Qualsiasi decisione prendi questa sera, saremo con te ... Ti auguro di realizzare i tuoi desideri, saremo con te ❤❤
Not sure what language this is lol but Thank you :heart:
 
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J

jgm63

Visionary
Oct 28, 2019
2,467
Not sure what language this is lol but Thank you :heart:
Google translate says :

Friend, my stepmother is preparing a roast beef for dinner. I will starve ugh

One of my favorite songs ❤ Whatever decision you make tonight, we'll be with you ... I wish you to realize your desires, we'll be with you
 
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Tired_M

Tired_M

Member
Nov 3, 2019
57
If you choose not to do anything today, or if you feel the need to talk, it'll be fine, we'll be here for you no matter what! I hope you'll find peace, I wish you the best :heart:
 
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Soul

Soul

gate gate paragate parasamgate bodhi svaha
Apr 12, 2019
4,704
@metalchic_74, the best thing about the term "catching the bus" is the way it emphasizes that we don't have to do it right now; another bus will always come along. Whatever you decide to do, I wish you a safe comfortable place to do it, and positive outcomes for you. x
 
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Meant2Die

Meant2Die

Specialist
Nov 8, 2019
307
Thank you I think most members here are across the pond. I plan on listening to my favorite music and chillin till it's time to go

I'm on the East Coast as well. Will be here throughout the day for you :heart:

Its completely normal to feel all those feelings, I certainly go through all of them when thinking about CBTing on a daily basis even after reading about SN for a while now and feeling like I understand the method well. You can do this, I know it!
 
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Quax

Quax

Student
Nov 16, 2019
140
I feel with you....i feel your doubts....i feel your anxiety....and i feel your need to end all this. I experienced it myself....and when I came around the corner the bus was gone.... But there are other buses.... what i want to say is don't rush it. The day will come when it's right. Maybe today, or tomorrow or next month or whenever.... take your time. Meanwhile we all are here for you❤️
 
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metalchic_74

metalchic_74

Gone Girl
Oct 26, 2019
260


Damn ya'll I'm already hungry still got 6 hours to go -_-
I'm getting nervous
Why are all my comments going on one reply????
 
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J

JoeFailure

Mage
Apr 29, 2019
591
I'm sorry that life and this world wasn't better to you.

Like everyone said, we're here till the end, whether that's today or if you choose a different day.

Love and light.
 
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metalchic_74

metalchic_74

Gone Girl
Oct 26, 2019
260
I'm sorry that life and this world wasn't better to you.

Like everyone said, we're here till the end, whether that's today or if you choose a different day.

Love and light.
Thank You :heart: I'm getting nervous about to pop an Ativan
 
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howard

howard

Experienced
Sep 13, 2019
268
Wishing you good luck and peace whatever you decide to do. X
 
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H

hopelessandbroken

Member
May 25, 2019
64
its gonna be okay whatever you decide and we are here for u <3
 
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metalchic_74

metalchic_74

Gone Girl
Oct 26, 2019
260
God time is going so slow...
 
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Lotus1818

Lotus1818

Experienced
Nov 4, 2019
248
Good luck metalchic we only spoke briefly but you were very certain on what you wanted to do. So you are brave enough to do it. I really hope u find the peace you want. I'll be thinking of you.
 
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