Discussion To the other people that self harm, why?

[Goose774]

I cut myself when I feel empty, bored, or overwhelmed with negative emotion. However I'm curious if there are other people who do it for other reasons or even the same reasons. If you don't that's probably for the better, but if you do, how do you do it and why?

 

[feder]

I started doing it when I was 11 because I somehow knew it would help me with my overwhelming emotions and self hatred. Then stopped for a while and started again last year but stopped about a month ago . It just calms you down immediately and it becomes easier to not think about the things that caused it in the first place. Also in my opinion self harm can be abusing substances such as alcohol and other drugs to feel better. I actually don't even remember how I figured out cutting can help with emotions it was somehow instinctual, never did it for attention, in fact I was scared that someone will figure it out and that's why I stopped (since I mainly cut my hands and live in a pretty hot country). It can become a real addiction for some people and i don't want that that's why I'm trying to not think of it anymore. Hope you also stop doing it soon.

 

[spøgelse]

De-stressing/whenever I'm overwhelmed. I promised myself no matter how low I'd get I'd never do it but other coping mechanisms stopped working and it was either that or substance abuse.
I like doing it on my left arm but I run hotter than a furnace so it's not an option right now. I mostly SH on my torso, occasionally legs and stomach.
Usually I just go at it until I'm satisfied and then wait until the blood stops flowing, after that I clean up and go back to whatever.

 

[Zelda-frog]

I started when I was like 12. I knew about it because my brother who was around my age would show me when he self harmed and he'd tell me why he'd do it. So I tried it myself one day because I was just so overwhelmed and emotional. Then it became an addiction for a bit. Now it's back to whenever I feel extremely overwhelmed.

 

[yukan]

i also cut if i'm too overwhelmed and need to release the emotion or when i'm too numb and need to feel something, and i kinda like seeing the blood. i used to like cleaning up after and taking care of myself, but now it's tiresome

 

[Valky]

For me it was also to let out negative emotions. I also cut when I felt suicidal.

I know some don't feel any pain or barely any but I do. I feel a lot. Especially when I kept cutting into wounds.

I needed that pain. To keep me grounded. To relieve myself from the negative emotions. To remind myself how much human I am and that my problems are valid and that I am not just 'lazy'. But also to keep myself here. To pull me back into reality and out of the state of mind of wanting to ctb.

 

[FireFox]

I self harm to block out all the negative feelings I think and feel. I love how the physical pain from self harming overrides all the emotional pain.

I used to cut myself as a teenager then I stopped. Majority of my self harm faded in my early 20s. I know self harm abusing really strong laxatives and diet pills

 

[Unending]

I used to do it in moments of extremely heightened emotional states that I deemed intolerable but it is one of those things that turns into a habit over time so I found myself just doing it for more everyday reasons or just for the sake of doing it at some point. I haven't cut in several months at this point but I remember feeling a strong need to do it everyday for a lot of last year

 

[cherrysquick]

most of my relapses are due to being overwhelmingly angry, although at this point i'm just straight up addicted lol. i always feel weird when people ask me why i do it because i use it as a coping method for basically everything... feeling happy, angry, sad, bored, numb ,, the list goes on. might sound silly but sometimes i do it for the sake of having scars, idk, makes me feel like my struggles are more serious / valid this way

 

[jonghyun]

ill usually do it when emotions get too intense. It functions for me primarily as a punishment+distraction. Say i get into an argument with someone or show strong emotions. Ill go and cut as a punishment because i should have kept it in and remained silent. And ill cut to distract myself from what i feel. After the sting and you clean up the blood you feel better. In some twisted way

 

[gaeulfeels]

I usually do it when i feel really depressed or angra. It helps a lot

 

[iwantdeath6969]

i started doing it at 13 and it quickly became an addiction. now i use it mainly to punish myself

 

[illmissmydogthatsit]

I do it impulsively during episodes of extreme anger/dysregulation. It helps a bit to offset the emotional pain— like a tradeoff. I Mostly punch/scratch/bite myself. I restrain myself from doing anything that would cause noticeable scarring because I'm private about the severity of my mental health issues.

 

[EndJstifiesTheMeans]

Because i hate my life
I got rejected from the girl i love and i keep thinking that im like trash

 

[glitterypearls]

I always said it's my urge to fix pain with pain. I either do it so I can focus on the physical pain which will help me ignore the emotional pain or It's a control thing for me.. I'm causing myself pain and I'm the one who can control how it looks, how it feels and how intense it's. I used to cut but it's not for me. now I bruise myself and burn a little bit. It's easier for me to control how intense the pain is with those two self harm methods.

 

[Velvet Fortress]

Back when I used to SH it was mostly out of self-directed anger. It was very impulsive too, used to essentially punch myself when my emotions got out of control. Apathy has tamed it down.

 

[icuddlecats5]

It's so hard to resist it sometimes. There could be a tiny moment that just triggers the urge to cut myself and I can't do anything about it. I'm aware of what I'm doing but it's almost like someone else is doing it for me. I feel horrible about it when I've made promises to stay clean, but in the moment it feels so relieving, the adrenaline burst is like no other. It's a true addiction

 

[No_Lxve]

I just felt the urge to cut whenever I'm excited or whenever I'm down, I just do it.

but I recently stopped since it gets real fucking itchy, and I don't want to deal with the itchiness.

 

[gotomrg]

it just feels right. i dont remember why exactly i started cutting myself, just this strong negative emotion. now it feels like it's something i've been doing my whole life

 

[minx]

I started to have at least some outlet and control in my life. Self harm felt like the only way to achieve that. Otherwise, the rush and immediate release after cutting feels really addicting. Moreover, i like the scars, for some reason. They are something made my Me, not inflicted by life or others. It's comforting.

 

[CentreMid]

I cut myself when I feel empty, bored, or overwhelmed with negative emotion. However I'm curious if there are other people who do it for other reasons or even the same reasons. If you don't that's probably for the better, but if you do, how do you do it and why?

Cutting in spots that won't be fatal and won't be easily (belly, thighs, shoulders). Mostly a coping mechanism for when I'm upset or numb. I do have to stop cutting my thighs though, as soccer is starting up soon and I don't want to reveal fresh wounds there because of my shorts.

 

[Jezzibell]

To show physical marks because I cannot convey the reason for my pain and discomfort mainly due to being so anorexic. I find it calming. I cut in the bath and i like seeing the blood flow. Its also as a punishment to myself for who I am. I cut, burst veins and blood vessels easily so the blood leaks under the skin although that also happens naturally from heat.

 

[SoftWorries]

Sometimes I've self harmed without being totally aware of it. It's not when I'm present, it's not when I'm totally disassociated but when it's only a bit misty in my mind I feel a lack of control that leads me to it naturally.

It's only when I've come back that I have any regrets over it but honestly? Usually it feels so foreign to me that I can't even feel much about it

I ended up with some nerve damage in my hands because of tourniquets on my arms. Even now I can barely fathom being able to have zero instinct for self preservation.

My mind is unable to process what it's like to be in that state when I'm not. Luckily it isn't very often.

That was a big secret so thanks for listening

 

[Not.Flugel]

A mix of self hatred and a whole lot of I don't know why. Sometimes because I am stressed, or because to remind myself that I deserve this shitty live or from keeping me to just stuffing sn down my throat.

 

[Petrichor]

I started years ago, I would have consistent mental breakdowns so I just started pouring boiling water on myself to get myself to stop thinking. It ended up scarring and people noticed so I freaked out and stopped, a couple years later shit happened and I started having panic attacks and mental breakdowns again so I began cutting. ]
Basically, it started out from mental breakdowns but because of how effective it is at numbing emotional pain (in exchange for physical pain) I continued without the panic attacks, it began feeling more like an obligation to me, I'd be in this rhythm where I'd cut every few days just to get that numb feeling all over again. Another part to it besides the obvious answers of numbing is I do it because I love to look at the scars. It's not some sexual thing, I just enjoy looking at everything I've done, it's great, it brings me immense satisfaction seeing what I've done to myself, contrary to a lot of people who are disgusted by them or don't care about them, I relish them. I just generally love looking at the cuts on my skin haha

 

[beolle]

constant need to feel pain and feel punished / purified.

it brings me immense satisfaction seeing what I've done to myself

and that, too. love being at least partially as damaged on the outside as i am on the inside.

 

[alonely]

i also have self harmed to manage intense emotions that i could not get under control, sometimes sobbing so hard for so long gives me unbearable headaches that i just need it to stop.

i think there is psychology to the idea. feeling sharp or immediate physical pain makes the brain fully focus on that feeling as a survival mechanism. which makes it stop focusing on the emotions.

i also liked seeing the blood, kind of in the sense of matching who i am on the inside to who i am on the outside. the outer pain shows the inner pain. it was just for myself though, i kept my cuts hidden from everyone. i liked seeing the cuts on my skin and pressing on them while they were healing for another hit of the pain.

havent done it in a long time, but i have been wanting to more and more lately

 

[JustNeedAdvice]

I started when I was about 9-10, I was having mental problems and I mostly started cutting out of curiosity. It sorta became an addiction over the years, for a while I was cutting very frequently and every time I was upset. Now though I have more control and only really do it if I want to distract myself or release the most overwhelming emotions. It can also be kinda satisfying, but I never really told anyone that. I still wear long sleeves even though I don't have much fresh scars to hide anymore, mostly bc of habit and that there are permanent ones

 

[S u i c i d e]

I hurt myself with a razor blade and it helps me feel better when I'm sad.

 

[wristcutangel]

i'm not sure. it started off as a cry for help, but now it's either an attempt to feel something or to get out feelings. it depends.