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journeytotheend

journeytotheend

Member
Jan 1, 2019
71
I really love how you have set up the room, looks really peaceful. Best of luck, I hope serenity finds you.
 
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15dec

15dec

ember in the dark
Dec 7, 2018
1,550
You've decorated it so beautifully. I hope you have a safe and peaceful journey, hugs
 
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21Neberg

21Neberg

Enlightened
Dec 17, 2018
1,624
If you're gonna do it do it right. No reason it has to be in a dank dark place. :) I want this to be a happy calming sort of situation, as much as I can make it. The luck is much appreciated!

You're so right. Why does suicide have to be sad? I'm eating a pizza before I hang myself, I'm going to make a good day out of it too.
 
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SiArc

SiArc

sassy and sarcastic-y
Dec 10, 2018
230
I believe there comes a time - and that's when we know it's the right time - when the divide between here and there becomes so translucent it's easy to slip through xx

And, I don't know why, but your Magnus gives me good vibes - can't explain it
Magnus just exuded good vibes. Everyone who meets him loves him. Even those scared of big dogs. He is dorky and goofy, and loving, and just... everything. Him for sure I shall miss.
 
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SiArc

SiArc

sassy and sarcastic-y
Dec 10, 2018
230
It's stunning I love it. I hope your journey will be peaceful, hugs and good luck
Sending hugs back at you. Thank you so much! May peace envelope you as well.
 
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SiArc

SiArc

sassy and sarcastic-y
Dec 10, 2018
230
You've decorated it so beautifully. I hope you have a safe and peaceful journey, hugs
Thank you kindly. *hugs back*
 
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SiArc

SiArc

sassy and sarcastic-y
Dec 10, 2018
230
I really love how you have set up the room, looks really peaceful. Best of luck, I hope serenity finds you.
Best of all it feels peaceful too. Thank you so much for the well wishes. I hope I know serenity soon.
 
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D

Deleted member 4993

Guest
Amazing and so well thought out, I wish you luck and peace on your journey.
 
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Pulmonicis

Pulmonicis

Member
Jan 1, 2019
50
Oh . My . Looks so fascinating ✓
I wish you peace. All the best luck SiArc. You will be greatly missed... *Lovable Hug*
 
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T

Thewhowithin69

Member
Dec 31, 2018
74
I almost forgot to show the mercury votives I have. Four different colors, oh so pretty to sit around the room. Sixty of those and 150 votives total to give ambiance to the space.

The other picture is of another altar I have, this one is to the Celtic Goddess Danu.

View attachment 5712 View attachment 5713 View attachment 5714

You are SO my kind of gal!! Those meccury votives are great!! I'm actually happy you have created such a comforting space for your joruney. It is so inviting I wish to make when I leave similar!! BTW I almost got those same Forrest banners myself a while back. Just couldn't seem to care to spend the money but I always have been drawn to trees and forrests. And fairy's but that's another story ;)
 
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SiArc

SiArc

sassy and sarcastic-y
Dec 10, 2018
230
You are SO my kind of gal!! Those meccury votives are great!! I'm actually happy you have created such a comforting space for your joruney. It is so inviting I wish to make when I leave similar!! BTW I almost got those same Forrest banners myself a while back. Just couldn't seem to care to spend the money but I always have been drawn to trees and forrests. And fairy's but that's another story ;)
They are really awesome quality tapestries. The pictures really don't do them justice. They are very vivid and I can picture myself in them. I wouldn't have spent the money either if I wasn't CTB'ing.

I can link you some of the things I used.l, just message me. Found some great things that work really well. Just in case you want to use them for your time. :)

I love all thing ethereal so I totally get it.
 
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SiArc

SiArc

sassy and sarcastic-y
Dec 10, 2018
230
Oh . My . Looks so fascinating ✓
I wish you peace. All the best luck SiArc. You will be greatly missed... *Lovable Hug*
*loveable hugs back* Thank you. It turned out to be a place you can just sit in for hours and the incense makes it smell amazing. I really hope you find your peace as well.
 
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SiArc

SiArc

sassy and sarcastic-y
Dec 10, 2018
230
Amazing and so well thought out, I wish you luck and peace on your journey.
Thank you, I am glad so many people like it as well. The time to plan was totally worth it. I love the wishes of luck and peace. I wish the same for you as well.
 
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JOT

JOT

Member
Jan 7, 2019
52
@SiArc this is wonderful. I hadn't considered creating such a safe and comfortable place for myself and because I intend for my ctb to look accidental, I wouldn't be able to do too much. But maybe some flowers, a candle, some music and scents wouldn't arrouse suspicion.

I am so sorry it has come to this for you. I wish you all the love and light in the world you beautiful soul xx
 
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SiArc

SiArc

sassy and sarcastic-y
Dec 10, 2018
230
@SiArc this is wonderful. I hadn't considered creating such a safe and comfortable place for myself and because I intend for my ctb to look accidental, I wouldn't be able to do too much. But maybe some flowers, a candle, some music and scents wouldn't arrouse suspicion.

I am so sorry it has come to this for you. I wish you all the love and light in the world you beautiful soul xx
Love and light to you as well. I am glad that you like it. :)

Yeah if you do something similar it could look like you were making a meditative or relaxation spot. This is your exit so you should have something you enjoy when you go. Something that calms instead of blankness. I wish for you that you are able to truely make it look accidental and peace.
 
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NoOneKnows

NoOneKnows

Specialist
Sep 12, 2018
323
I wish you beautiful journey and arrival to another realm. I love the decoration so much, it is exactly what I wanted to do in my room ,cuz I love forest so much, but cant afford.
You seem like a lovely soul. Sending you and Magnus big hugs <3 May you find peace
 
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G

GeorgeEastman

Arcanist
Sep 3, 2018
470
The selfish part was very inspirational.

I believe we all are. Whether you live or die, you're ultimately doing it for yourself even if you do consider others. The buck stops with what's in that mirror.
 
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SiArc

SiArc

sassy and sarcastic-y
Dec 10, 2018
230
I wish you beautiful journey and arrival to another realm. I love the decoration so much, it is exactly what I wanted to do in my room ,cuz I love forest so much, but cant afford.
You seem like a lovely soul. Sending you and Magnus big hugs <3 May you find peace
Oh thank you very much. Yeah, it did cost a pretty penny to get everything just right. I let a lot of things go (bills, rent, etc) to get the money to buy the things that will make this my peaceful place and to help bring in the energy and protection that I required. I mean, why pay on them if I am not going to use the things in the afterlife or void or whatever may be. I can say it was well worth it. I do not advise everyone to do what I did but I do encourage people to make their space a peaceful place, a place that can bring some comfort.
I wish you much peace and luck with your space and travels as well.
 
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SiArc

SiArc

sassy and sarcastic-y
Dec 10, 2018
230
The selfish part was very inspirational.

I believe we all are. Whether you live or die, you're ultimately doing it for yourself even if you do consider others. The buck stops with what's in that mirror.
Ah on my profile. Yes, I fully believe with this you must be selfish in the terms of leaving or staying you must only think of yourself and easing or prolonging what you want or need. Yes the peripheral things like family and such can weigh but they do not live your life, they do not feel what haunts and hunts you, they do not feel the crumbling and shadows. Everything ripples but you must only be concerned what you are around for. When you are dead it is none of your concern so do not overly think past it.

That is my philosophy.
 
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SiArc

SiArc

sassy and sarcastic-y
Dec 10, 2018
230
This is absolutely gorgeous! Thank you so so much for the picture and beautiful words. I hope that I will leave a positive imprint on this community and that I at least tough loved some people. I wish everyone a smooth journey. *hugs and love back*
 
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L

Lefty

Mage
Dec 7, 2018
530
Good luck in your journey, I hope you find peace.
 
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Stillnotsure

Stillnotsure

Experienced
Dec 18, 2018
245
Peace to you and your journey. Too bad we can't hire you to be the interior design expert to ctb. Your room looks perfect!
 
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Alexander

Alexander

Member
Dec 11, 2018
35
I respect your choice and I'm sure that you didn't deserve all this suffering, but also your dog doesn't deserve it. There is someone who can take care of Magnus? Becouse if it's not I think that you first have to find a new owner for the dog. When you will die he will surely suffer and without someone who could take care of him he will go in a kennel, you can understand that he don't deserve all this suffering.
I hope you may find your peace and I'm really sorry that life didn't give you a good reason for keeping to live
 
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SiArc

SiArc

sassy and sarcastic-y
Dec 10, 2018
230
Peace to you and your journey. Too bad we can't hire you to be the interior design expert to ctb. Your room looks perfect!
Ha! I was making a joke about that yesterday. I will forego my CTB wants to be the interior designer for other's CTB spaces. Maybe get an HGTV show (big decorating channel in the USA for those not here).

Alas my CTB calls. I wish I would be able to put pics up when everything is where it is suppose to be and lite by the candles. It will be magical. Thank you so much for the peaceful journey wishes. I wish the same for you wherever yours leads you.
 
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Stillnotsure

Stillnotsure

Experienced
Dec 18, 2018
245
Ha! I was making a joke about that yesterday. I will forego my CTB wants to be the interior designer for other's CTB spaces. Maybe get an HGTV show (big decorating channel in the USA for those not here).

Alas my CTB calls. I wish I would be able to put pics up when everything is where it is suppose to be and lite by the candles. It will be magical. Thank you so much for the peaceful journey wishes. I wish the same for you wherever yours leads you.
Haha glad you got the joke! I was definitely thinking HGTV show host as your calling!

You are a sweet and gentle person. I'll miss seeing your posts. Good luck friend!
 
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SiArc

SiArc

sassy and sarcastic-y
Dec 10, 2018
230
I respect your choice and I'm sure that you didn't deserve all this suffering, but also your dog doesn't deserve it. There is someone who can take care of Magnus? Becouse if it's not I think that you first have to find a new owner for the dog. When you will die he will surely suffer and without someone who could take care of him he will go in a kennel, you can understand that he don't deserve all this suffering.
I hope you may find your peace and I'm really sorry that life didn't give you a good reason for keeping to live

My fluffy one and I have been together for 7 years, he is the sole reason I have lasted this long and why I have struggled so hard to get out of this place my spirit is stuck in. We are very bonded to each other, I believe he is my soulmate (non-romatic version just in case anyone's brains went that way). I have tried recently to give him to very very good families 4 times (I am extremely particular with who takes care of my furkid. He is very much my kid and such a good good pup) and each time he has gotten loose and has come back to me. My attempt in November he tried to follow the ambulance and my best friend (which was 2 or the tries to rehome, his best doggy friend lives there) took him and he would not stay still for the three days I was in the hospital. We are rarely ever in separate rooms when I am home, which is most of the time. He is the only one that I thought of when I have been planning this or anything I have done since he has blessed me with his presence in my life.

He shall be cared for. I am not going to go into details with the part of everything that has to deal with him but things will work out.

Thank you for the wishes of peace. May you have peace as well. :)
 
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Alexander

Alexander

Member
Dec 11, 2018
35
My fluffy one and I have been together for 7 years, he is the sole reason I have lasted this long and why I have struggled so hard to get out of this place my spirit is stuck in. We are very bonded to each other, I believe he is my soulmate (non-romatic version just in case anyone's brains went that way). I have tried recently to give him to very very good families 4 times (I am extremely particular with who takes care of my furkid. He is very much my kid and such a good good pup) and each time he has gotten loose and has come back to me. My attempt in November he tried to follow the ambulance and my best friend (which was 2 or the tries to rehome, his best doggy friend lives there) took him and he would not stay still for the three days I was in the hospital. We are rarely ever in separate rooms when I am home, which is most of the time. He is the only one that I thought of when I have been planning this or anything I have done since he has blessed me with his presence in my life.

He shall be cared for. I am not going to go into details with the part of everything that has to deal with him but things will work out.

Thank you for the wishes of peace. May you have peace as well. :)

I'm not a pro-life bigot at all, but If he's 7 years old already you may wait another few year, big dogs average life is about 10-12 years, so you will spare him the suffering of losing you.
I don't want to judge you, is just a suggestion for helping you to do a more aware evaluation for your CTB.
I know well life can be so dark that keep living just one day more can be an agony.
Give an hug to Magnus by me and I apologize if you felt judged by me or similar stuff, English is not my first language and I don't know it well, so for me it's difficult to write in English.
 
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SiArc

SiArc

sassy and sarcastic-y
Dec 10, 2018
230
I'm not a pro-life bigot at all, but If he's 7 years old already you may wait another few year, big dogs average life is about 10-12 years, so you will spare to him the suffering of losing you.
I don't want to judge you, is just a suggestion.
I know well life can be so dark that keep living just one day more can be an agony.
Give hug to Magnus by me and I apologize if you felt judged by me or similar, English is not my first language and I don't know it well, so for me it's difficult to write in English.

I have agonized over this and how to wrap it around him so he suffers the least but my health, what is going on both physically and psychologically will not allow it. Not to mention financially. He is always my first thought and the decider in what I do, where I go, what things I do or don't take on. He gets better food than I do and he has more toys and treats than I have clothes. I cannot express exactly how much I absolutely love him. He is my heart and soul. He is so gentle and loving but I cannot go another week, let alone years living.

This hasn't been a rash decision, it has been thought of for years, pushed off for years for just one more day. For him I have been relentless, to see maybe it will get better. But my body just keeps getting worse. My spine is deteriorating, my brain condition is coming back. I will have no quality of life. 10 years ago I had "never give in, never give up" tattooed on my full forearm to remind myself that I have to keep going. I have had to look at it every day. Every day the darkness threatened to consume me I have cuddled with him and looked at that tattoo. I know this is the right decision and I know now is the time. I feel it deep in my core.

You have not offended me in the least, nor do I feel judged. I love that you care enough to ask after the pup-a-lup. I will give him a huge hug from you. By the way you write in English just fine. :)
 
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L

lifeisbutadream

Warlock
Oct 4, 2018
733
Hello all,

So I will be leaving this site in the next day or two and will be departing this realm this Sunday/early Monday during the eclipse. I am not going to discuss some of my method because part of it is not palatable to some but I will be using SA and a CNS depressant or two amongst a few failsafes. I have effectively made sure there is nothing waiting for me or keeping me here in this life. I can't stay due to health issues arising and existing as well. This passing is not a sad thing for me. I do have trepidation but I am at peace with what I want and must do. Whatever awaits me I welcome it.

I am doing my CTB during an astronomical event that coinsides with some minor spiritual belief events and such. I have decorated my sacred space and some here had wanted pictures. I promised I would show them. They are below. I could not go to a lush forest so I brought it to me. These are just quick pictures and the space might need a tweak or two to make the ceiling fuller. I have chamomile, lavendar, and roses to spread along with several kinds of protective salts to circle and ward and candles to bring in the right energies.

The Goddess on the altar with the owls is the Norse Goddess Frigga. The pup on the chair is named Magnus. The pictures don't do the whole thing justice. This will be a very peaceful place to pass.

View attachment 5701 View attachment 5702 View attachment 5703 View attachment 5704 View attachment 5706 View attachment 5707 View attachment 5708 View attachment 5709

Thank you to those who have been kind and favorably witty. I wish you all so much luck on your paths. For the others, well, yeah. I don't want this post deleted so I will leave it at that.

Remeber do your research, don't rely on others. You are responsible for yourself. With things like this you can't put anyone elses feeling into your final decision. You must be selfish with it. Whichever way you go. May peace find you.

edit:spelling


Si


So very beautiful. Godspeed! You will awaken in beauty beyond the ability of earthly words to describe!
 
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