This is “ life”

[walkingdead2023]

So I work everyday from 7-7 all what I see is sick people trying to survive life: infections, viruses, accidents, abuse, weakness, elderly got thrown by the ER for nursing homes placements, etc.. seeing all of this on the top of my overwhelming urge to die is a lot on me. I got paid today I sat in my car to smoke my cigarette on my break and within 30 minutes I paid for a million things now my account is $100 so what you think?? Are you still going to tell me there is good in life!!!! I made it to the hotel I'm still at the hotel after my dad kicked his only daughter out took a shower and I'm here with you here. I'm not talking on the phone I'm not watching a movie I'm not eating.. I'm here what's that mean!? Although we use fake profiles but I feel close to each one of you here like a family I feel I belong here and no where else. Same thing I feel when I go to the graveyard " I feel home" I'm typing this but I'm also crying I need to die but I can't find away I'm being forced to work which I don't want to part of me dead already I might as well just die ASAP

 

[tbroken]

OMG 7-7. What do you do?

 

[walkingdead2023]

OMG 7-7. What do you do?

RN

 

[tbroken]

RN

I worked in hospitals as Systems Engineer, they can be vicious places sometimes... And 7-7 is really hard to cope with...
Can you ask to work less?

 

[walkingdead2023]

I worked in hospitals as Systems Engineer, they can be vicious places sometimes... And 7-7 is really hard to cope with...
Can you ask to work less?

I do hours towards my np practice which I'm hoping to leave this world before I finish this program.. I never wanted the medical area to begin with but my " dad" is a dentist and wants everyone to be like him he's " full of it" ..

 

[sserafim]

I do hours towards my np practice which I'm hoping to leave this world before I finish this program.. I never wanted the medical area to begin with but my " dad" is a dentist and wants everyone to be like him he's " full of it" ..

I'm sorry to hear that. My parents wanted me to be a doctor, but I failed to launch after college so I'm just a hiki lol. Out of curiosity, what would you have chosen as your preferred career?

 

[walkingdead2023]

I'm sorry to hear that. My parents wanted me to be a doctor, but I failed to launch after college so I'm just a hiki lol. Out of curiosity, what would you have chosen as your preferred career?

Dancer! I like to dance lol but of course this will literally stops my dad heart I'm just tired I'm thinking about getting in my car and just drive into the river

 

[DreamEnd]

Dancer! I like to dance lol but of course this will literally stops my dad heart I'm just tired I'm thinking about getting in my car and just drive into the river

I know rns who were rns prior to starting a business. But they worked 3 12hour shifts a week. Maybe you can change your schedule so you can dance more idk?

 

[walkingdead2023]

I know rns who were rns prior to starting a business. But they worked 3 12hour shifts a week. Maybe you can change your schedule so you can dance more idk?

So I'm in the Nurse Practitioner at NYU Rory Meyers College so I do my 3 days plus the over time when we have trauma then I study and do my clinical so no days off at all if I'm off I'm at the library.. I'm doing all of this because my dad wanted me to I don't give a fuck about my career. I'm really done with this life none can understand me I'm literally hating life more and more each day

 

[DreamEnd]

So I'm in the Nurse Practitioner at NYU Rory Meyers College so I do my 3 days plus the over time when we have trauma then I study and do my clinical so no days off at all if I'm off I'm at the library.. I'm doing all of this because my dad wanted me to I don't give a fuck about my career. I'm really done with this life none can understand me I'm literally hating life more and more each day

Yeah I heard some surgeons even do hate their lives as well. Argh it's all so tiring

 

[divinemistress87]

Can you switch to a less stressful nursing job? The lady that does my botox is a RN and all she does is pump people's face full of botox all day , boring but not stressful

 

[reclaimedbynature]

I'm so sorry op, if I were rich I'd buy us all castles and mansions.

 

[walkingdead2023]

Yeah I heard some surgeons even do hate their lives as well. Argh it's all so tiring

Sometimes I feel like I can't breath

Can you switch to a less stressful nursing job? The lady that does my botox is a RN and all she does is pump people's face full of botox all day , boring but not stressful

I would if I have some kind of purpose but I don't. I being my family anyway someone offered me private practice to just literally manage his insurance company CDI but before I even say yes to his offer he sent me invite to go out with him for dinner so I said "no maybe next time" he kept on texting days and nights to ask me what I'm doing so I blocked him.

I'm so sorry op, if I were rich I'd buy us all castles and mansions.

That's nice of you Money is important to survive but can't make you happy tho!