The rope is right here. The anchor is right there.

[OnMyLast Legs]

And yet I don't hang myself. Anyone else's mind made up and fear/SI stops them cold? This is unbearable, but I just keep bearing it.

 

[Terrible_Life]

Yes I was stopped by si but my second attempt will succeed now I just wanna die and stop this torture

 

[hitori-bocchi]

the SI of FSH from the setup, to the hanging, to the kick off. theres too much build up and pain and anxiety. i find the pain really stings taking it all down and sitting in that numbness.

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

Notes are written, in the box with some important possessions (keys, credit cards). Tested the anchor point, tied my noose at the right height, stood on the chair. This could be go time (it won't be, it never is).

 

[Terrible_Life]

Right now I practice hanging now my neck hurts …. What a fucked up society instead of giving us the option of dying peacefully no they leave us with these painful methods ….. wish I was never born , wish the nurse would have been an angel and would've killed right there after I was born , so much pain would've never happened to me….

 

[kuroshimi]

I practiced it multiple times, but something is stopping me. Not sure if it's fear/SI or something else. Guess I just keeping bearing too.

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

Toes touched the floor. Stronger partial pressure than before. Thought maybe it would black me out. Put on my scapular just in case . I suppose every dry run helps with the fear but I'm still pussyfooting around.
wtf man hanging is painful and scary is there no way out

 

[kouna]

I've done 2 test runs, I'm quite confident I'll do it when the time comes.

 

[Zanmato]

What a fucked up society instead of giving us the option of dying peacefully no they leave us with these painful methods

Indeed.
People say that if you commit suicide, you choose the "easy way", or something, to avoid problems.
How foolish, how ignorant.

 

[fkyou]

Same.. it's unbearable and painful to the max emotionally in torture every day yet I still didn't do that 5mins hanging..I'm here for years mind you..ehhh wtf is wrong with me

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

I've done 2 test runs, I'm quite confident I'll do it when the time comes.

Braver than me, I feel stuck here after today's incident. I guess I can try again tonight

 

[Terrible_Life]

Indeed.
People say that if you commit suicide, you choose the "easy way", or something, to avoid problems.
How foolish, how ignorant.

Committing suicide is something that needs a lot of energy it's not like ordering a pizza instead of cooking it is a difficult thing especially the mental terror aspect of it. Our brain our psyche it all starts to work against us and all we're left with is to build enough strength to just do it

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

I think I could use a gun but this neck squeeze is something else

Edit: there are a lot worse pains. I just need to tie it a little higher and try again. Heck, I might even have the willpower to lean into partial. Let's goooooo

 

[Zanmato]

Committing suicide is something that needs a lot of energy it's not like ordering a pizza instead of cooking it is a difficult thing especially the mental terror aspect of it. Our brain our psyche it all starts to work against us and all we're left with is to build enough strength to just do it

This.
I wish it was so easy.
Non suicidal people will never understand

 

[absolute failure]

Committing suicide is something that needs a lot of energy it's not like ordering a pizza instead of cooking it is a difficult thing especially the mental terror aspect of it. Our brain our psyche it all starts to work against us and all we're left with is to build enough strength to just do it

The reward is eternal peace though, that kinda comforts me

 

[barely_afloat]

you have to feel so so numb to be able to commit... and even then, the mental and emotional anguish can make you quit welp

 

[Terrible_Life]

The reward is eternal peace though, that kinda comforts me

Yes that's true but to get there to this eternal peace at least I (can't speak for others) must endure a huge amount of pain. It's the physical pain while doing full hanging on the one side but it's also the mental pain. I know I wanna die it's crystal clear but still my mind is working against me this extremely exhausting. I wish also my mind would be on my side then I might even do it tonight in the woods somewhere

 

[absolute failure]

Yes that's true but to get there to this eternal peace at least I (can't speak for others) must endure a huge amount of pain. It's the physical pain while doing full hanging on the one side but it's also the mental pain. I know I wanna die it's crystal clear but still my mind is working against me this extremely exhausting. I wish also my mind would be on my side then I might even do it tonight in the woods somewhere

sadly thats true. either you get lucky and die in a traffic accident, or you die of old age peacefully in your sleep. both wont happen for most of us on this site, so we gotta take the shitty way out :/