Carina

Carina

Angelic
Dec 22, 2019
4,005
:pfff: :pfff: :pfff: :pfff:

If your friend only knew?!

Yeah, I mean he knows I'm suicidal, but he also believes the Lithium has totally stopped all suicidal thoughts and actions. And since I'm happier, I'm obviously better (like, yeah... he's totally forgot the "depressed/suicidal, instant turnaround=they're planning" thing).

Yeah, if he read any of my posts here, omg I'd probably find an escort to a psych ward led by my mother tomorrow. Jokes on them though--it has a max day hold of 7 days no matter what.
 
  • Love
  • Hugs
Reactions: Nemeshisu, BlueWidow and realjunes
M

Morphinekiss

Enlightened
Jun 8, 2019
1,207
I haven't tried to get it from a psychiatrist. I'll have to give that a try. I did go to a psychiatrist at one point and he gave me Klonopin, which also seems to put me to sleep. I've been living where I am a little over a year now, so I don't have any relationships with any doctors here.


If you've been given klonopin before it should be relatively easy to go to a new psychiatrist and tell them you're experiencing panic attacks and you've used klonopin in the past and would like to try it again. Klonopin knocks me on my ass. Xanax gives me a more mellow calm and I can function, I have to mix Xanax and ambien to sleep, but I have a tolerance at this point.
 
  • Like
Reactions: BlueWidow
Carina

Carina

Angelic
Dec 22, 2019
4,005
I was curious, but are others medicines already on file for years like they are on mine no matter who prescribes them, and no matter where you go in the area? I can't get away with a "I was on this once" because they have the list. It's both good, and annoying as hell.
 
  • Like
Reactions: BlueWidow
Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
Yeah, I mean he knows I'm suicidal, but he also believes the Lithium has totally stopped all suicidal thoughts and actions. And since I'm happier, I'm obviously better (like, yeah... he's totally forgot the "depressed/suicidal, instant turnaround=they're planning" thing).

Yeah, if he read any of my posts here, omg I'd probably find an escort to a psych ward led by my mother tomorrow. Jokes on them though--it has a max day hold of 7 days no matter what.
My NP also prescribed me lithium for my suicidal thoughts and I told him about this website, but not the name and surprisingly, he didn't throw me in the psych ward
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: BlueWidow, realjunes and Carina
Carina

Carina

Angelic
Dec 22, 2019
4,005
My NP also prescribed me lithium for my suicidal thoughts and I told him about this website, but not the name and surprisingly, he didn't through me in the psych ward
Yeah my doctors wouldn't -- but mom-friend sure would lol (they'd say I was a threat to myself and lieing about it, so even if I tried to convince them, they'd assume I was lieing, and my file is in their computer systems as my psychiatrist is with the psych ward).
 
  • Wow
  • Aww..
Reactions: BlueWidow and realjunes
Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
Yeah my doctors wouldn't -- but mom-friend sure would lol (they'd say I was a threat to myself and lieing about it, so even if I tried to convince them, they'd assume I was lieing, and my file is in their computer systems as my psychiatrist is with the psych ward).
Though my NP did make me promise him that I wouldn't kill myself
 
Carina

Carina

Angelic
Dec 22, 2019
4,005
Though my NP did make me promise him that I wouldn't kill myself
Really? I am so glad my doctors never asked me to do that. I never make a promise I can't keep.

Just something my grandmother told me that I've always followed.

Cool... mom just left..... say hello to the alcohol.... because I need a drink.
 
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: BlueWidow and realjunes
Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
Really? I am so glad my doctors never asked me to do that. I never make a promise I can't keep.

Just something my grandmother told me that I've always followed.

Cool... mom just left..... say hello to the alcohol.... because I need a drink.
This is the first time that any mental health professional has made me promise not to kill myself
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Carina
Carina

Carina

Angelic
Dec 22, 2019
4,005
This is the first time that any mental health professional has made me promise not to kill myself
Maybe that's kind of sweet then? I don't know...
So many ways you can take such a thing!
3 sips of heavily diluted wine. I may be a bit... leany.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Squiddy
W

Worthless_nobody

Enlightened
Feb 14, 2019
1,384
Hi everyone. I hope @Jean4 is ok I haven't seen her post today.
 
  • Love
Reactions: BlueWidow
BlueWidow

BlueWidow

Visionary
Oct 6, 2019
2,179
If you've been given klonopin before it should be relatively easy to go to a new psychiatrist and tell them you're experiencing panic attacks and you've used klonopin in the past and would like to try it again. Klonopin knocks me on my ass. Xanax gives me a more mellow calm and I can function, I have to mix Xanax and ambien to sleep, but I have a tolerance at this point.
Yeah, that sucks when you develop a tolerance. I try to only take the meds when I absolutely need them so that that won't happen to me. Of course, that means I spend a lot of time feeling like shit when I probably don't need to if I would just take the meds. The last time I took Klonopin, it made me kind of dizzy and I couldn't really do anything but sit around all day. But I was calm. I had no motivation to do anything though.
 
BlueWidow

BlueWidow

Visionary
Oct 6, 2019
2,179
Hi everyone. I hope @Jean4 is ok I haven't seen her post today.
Me too. I'm a bit worried about her, especially since I saw the tribute thread a little earlier today. @SinisterKid closed it out though saying that it was too early to have one of those. I'm hoping she's just taking a break.

Hopefully, she's resting up for the big party tomorrow.
 
  • Love
Reactions: Carina and Worthless_nobody
Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
How about we go with he does, if that's what you want--or that he doesn't, if that's what you prefer :)


Just one post, and a status update.
I think I'm gonna go with he does and thinking about it now, I feel like he does because he was quite thorough with me and took the time to go over my symptoms in his office
 
  • Love
Reactions: Carina
BlueWidow

BlueWidow

Visionary
Oct 6, 2019
2,179
6E5mG0xRTY2k9Cbyrbij 166 hershey hot cocoa

Okay, Time for hot cocoa. I may try to go to bed early tonight and see if I can get rested up for the big party tomorrow. I'm already feeling sleepy, so I'm hoping the hot cocoa will take me the rest of the way. :zzz:
 
Last edited:
  • Love
  • Like
Reactions: Nemeshisu, Squiddy and Carina
Carina

Carina

Angelic
Dec 22, 2019
4,005
Some people's threads are so touching, heartwarming, sad... I can't read them entirely without being too emotional... I can't imagine how others can live through something like that, when I can't even make it through a story of what happened.



View attachment 23062

Okay, Time for hot cocoa. I may try to go to bed early tonight and see if I can get rested up for the big party tomorrow. I'm already feeling sleepy, so I'm hoping the hot cocoa will take me the rest of the way. :zzz:
Hot cocoa sounds good-- Sleep well
 
  • Love
Reactions: BlueWidow
Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
Some people's threads are so touching, heartwarming, sad... I can't read them entirely without being too emotional... I can't imagine how others can live through something like that, when I can't even make it through a story of what happened.




Hot cocoa sounds good-- Sleep well
Hot cocoa does sound good
 
  • Love
Reactions: BlueWidow
BlueWidow

BlueWidow

Visionary
Oct 6, 2019
2,179
Some people's threads are so touching, heartwarming, sad... I can't read them entirely without being too emotional... I can't imagine how others can live through something like that, when I can't even make it through a story of what happened.
Hot cocoa sounds good-- Sleep well
Thank you. I know the thread is long and in some places probably hard to read. Believe me, it wasn't any easier to actually go through. However, since I was pretty much out of my mind for most of the ending, in some ways it's all kind of a blur. The only reason I even recall the events is because I was writing them down as I was going along. That's how I can go back and recall what happened. At one point, my husband's family was saying they were going to file a lawsuit against some of the doctors who mistreated my husband, but then because of a bunch of family politics that happened after my husband's death, everyone quit speaking to each other and I had no one left that would help me file the lawsuit. I couldn't really do it by myself because I was barely in any shape to do anything. And then the statute of limitations ran out. :meh:
Thanks, I hope I get some good sleep again tonight. I just hope I don't have any dreams. I had a really weird dream last night that involved this website and I meant to get up first thing this morning and write it down, but since I didn't do it, I've now forgotten what it was, except that it was really weird and disconcerting to me. :pfff:
Hot cocoa does sound good
Wish I could send you some through the Internet, @Squiddy. When are they going to invent something like that where you can send things through the Internet? Imagine all the food and booze and stuff we could've been sharing for real if you could just do it that way.
 
Last edited:
Carina

Carina

Angelic
Dec 22, 2019
4,005
Thank you. I know the thread is long and in some places probably hard to read. Believe me, it wasn't any easier to actually go through. However, since I was pretty much out of my mind for most of the ending, in some ways it's all kind of a blur. The only reason I even recall the events is because I was writing them down as I was going along. That's how I can go back and recall what happened. At one point, my husband's family was saying they were going to file a lawsuit against some of the doctors who mistreated my husband, but then because of a bunch of family politics that happened after my husband's death, everyone quit speaking to each other and I had no one left that would help me file the lawsuit. I couldn't really do it by myself because I was barely in any shape to do anything. And then the statute of limitations ran out. :meh:
Thanks, I hope I get some good sleep again tonight. I just hope I don't have any dreams. I had a really weird dream last night that involved this website and I meant to get up first thing this morning and write it down, but since I didn't do it, I've now forgotten what it was, except that it was really weird and disconcerting to me. :pfff:
And yeah, it was yours I was talking about. Didn't want to outright say, but I was hoping you knew. Especially since you were heading to bed.
 
  • Love
Reactions: BlueWidow
Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
Thank you. I know the thread is long and in some places probably hard to read. Believe me, it wasn't any easier to actually go through. However, since I was pretty much out of my mind for most of the ending, in some ways it's all kind of a blur. The only reason I even recall the events is because I was writing them down as I was going along. That's how I can go back and recall what happened. At one point, my husband's family was saying they were going to file a lawsuit against some of the doctors who mistreated my husband, but then because of a bunch of family politics that happened after my husband's death, everyone quit speaking to each other and I had no one left that would help me file the lawsuit. I couldn't really do it by myself because I was barely in any shape to do anything. And then the statute of limitations ran out. :meh:
Thanks, I hope I get some good sleep again tonight. I just hope I don't have any dreams. I had a really weird dream last night that involved this website and I meant to get up first thing this morning and write it down, but since I didn't do it, I've now forgotten what it was, except that it was really weird and disconcerting to me. :pfff:

Wish I could send you some through the Internet, @Squiddy. When are they going to invent something like that where you can send things through the Internet? Imagine all the food and booze and stuff we could've been sharing for real if you could just do it that way.
That would be cool if there were such a thing to send food and stuff over the Internet
 
  • Love
Reactions: BlueWidow
Carina

Carina

Angelic
Dec 22, 2019
4,005
That would be cool if there were such a thing to send food and stuff over the Internet
That it would.

I accidentally put too much pink salt in my potatoes. I would've had it delivered instantly over internet if that was an option, but ate it instead lol
I have a salt grinder, salt things were too big to grind, so I put like 12 big chunks of salt in them lol.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Squiddy
Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
That it would.

I accidentally put too much pink salt in my potatoes. I would've had it delivered instantly over internet if that was an option, but ate it instead lol
I have a salt grinder, salt things were too big to grind, so I put like 12 big chunks of salt in them lol.
Potatoes sound good too right now
 
L

Life sucks

Visionary
Apr 18, 2018
2,136
Very bad year and the next will be worse because of time passing and deteriorating. The only good side is the easiness of 2020
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: Squiddy, BlueWidow and Carina
Carina

Carina

Angelic
Dec 22, 2019
4,005
Very bad year and the next will be worse because of time passing and deteriorating. The only good side is the easiness of 2020
Have plans for 2020 then I take it? Like just anything that is--sorry bit drunk right now. And yes, as Squiddy says, bringing fun things to the party :D
 
Last edited:
Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
Very bad year and the next will be worse because of time passing and deteriorating. The only good side is the easiness of 2020
Welcome to the party @Life sucks what will you be bringing?
 
R

RationalGirl

Student
Dec 30, 2019
118
Happy new year to all
 
  • Like
Reactions: realjunes and Squiddy
L

Life sucks

Visionary
Apr 18, 2018
2,136
Have plans for 2020 then I take it? Like just anything that is--sorry bit drunk right now. And yes, as Squiddy says, bringing fun things to the party :D

Sorry if this happy thread and I put a post thats not supposed to be in. I have plans as usual. Eat some delicious food and play some games. I have no plans for a year, only for few next days, so lets see how 1/1/2020 would be
Welcome to the party @Life sucks what will you be bringing?

Food and gaming. Music in the background.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Squiddy

Similar threads

willitpass
Replies
181
Views
10K
Suicide Discussion
pandorasactor
pandorasactor
sevennn
Replies
0
Views
319
Suicide Discussion
sevennn
sevennn
pain6batch9
Replies
0
Views
263
Offtopic
pain6batch9
pain6batch9
KuriGohan&Kamehameha
Replies
31
Views
1K
Offtopic
Trying To Live
T