Discussion The main reason I'm still here is sheer procrastination

[prelapsarian]

I'm literally so lazy I can't even kill myself without procrastinating on it forever. I don't get a lot of alone time (I live with my family, none of us have jobs, and they don't leave the house a lot) but every time I do the motivation to attempt just isn't there. Every time I get a window of motivation where I'm in a mental place to CTB, it's when they're at home and these things never line up how I want.

At this point I'm literally purposely saving news articles and stuff in a rope fuel bookmark folder in hopes I can intentionally depress myself enough when I get a chance but don't feel up to it. I doubt even that will work. Why am I like this.