Discussion ‘ suicide ‘ note

[loopylou]

I have been dabbling with the idea of leaving a suicide note since my failed attempt. I started writing it on notes on my phone.

I feel it's really easy to start being negative about people and kinda putting some of the blame on them. I know that's proper harsh as they will be dealing with my death.

need help staying on track instead of name blaming.

if you wouldn't mind sharing, what kind of content are you including in yours? I'm so tempted to just not bother saving it. And just leave nothing

 

[LONE WOLF.]

I'm leaving nothing behind but a mile of carnage!

 

[JustAMatterOfTime]

I was not going to leave anything as writing isn't really "me", not in that way anyway. I tried making one I just apologise in it and give examples of why I just can't have a normal life no matter how hard I try with specific examples over a long time frame hoping to be convincing, I think it is rubbish and I doubt I would leave anything probably just say goodnight then go. I don't blame anyone in it though I do not want to be mean and my circumstances might be different to yours but I really have no one to blame not to the extent that it would make me want to die anyway.

 

[loopylou]

I was not going to leave anything as writing isn't really "me", not in that way anyway. I tried making one I just apologise in it and give examples of why I just can't have a normal life no matter how hard I try with specific examples over a long time frame hoping to be convincing, I think it is rubbish and I doubt I would leave anything probably just say goodnight then go. I don't blame anyone in it though I do not want to be mean and my circumstances might be different to yours but I really have no one to blame not to the extent that it would make me want to die anyway.

It's hard to put into words how your mental health is making life unbearable to people who don't suffer with it.
i have had a few people abuse me over the years. My ex used to physically and mentally abuse me for well over a decade. And when my mum died my brother turned into some sort of money grabbing freak and made my life / my grieving impossible.

 

[FuneralCry]

For mine, I will probably just write down the reasons why I have chosen this option and I will just say that I am in a better place now as my suffering has ended.I will probably just talk about how this option is inevitable and how there was nothing that could have saved me, it was what I had wanted for a long time. I feel like in a suicide note, I personally wouldn't mention other people, I would just keep it about myself. I just think the note is about closure.

 

[JustAMatterOfTime]

It's hard to put into words how your mental health is making life unbearable to people who don't suffer with it.
i have had a few people abuse me over the years. My ex used to physically and mentally abuse me for well over a decade. And when my mum died my brother turned into some sort of money grabbing freak and made my life / my grieving impossible.

That's probably the problem I can't say it so why should I be able to write it… it'd seem like I ordered a suicide note off one of those places that sell college essays. Sorry :( I don't think it's inappropriate to blame them then if they have done such terrible things it is horrible and if they caused your pain they deserve guilt at the very least. I've lived such a sheltered life I see that everyday on here.

 

[Joplin]

Been wondering what to write too. I don't really want to leave any specific letter anymore. I want to go out peacefully with no blame, no shaming. Just here's my will, here's my life insurance etc. I've got the all the documents and box of important items ready. That's it. No explanation. Facts. Like the scientist I am :) Those that abused me will carry their own guilt and should work through that in their own process. Would be about time. Friends know my story and majority of them know how depressed I've been.

However.....I will be leaving my trauma timeline page for my EMDR sessions in my apartment. The timeline of over 25 physical and sexual or life threatening events from my entire life that I can remember which highlights each event and what happened. So there too will be carnage! :D Mwahaha!
But no really. I'm done fighting in this life. I want to end the pain and struggle. So
It's peaceful and logical for me. But you got to do what's true for you!

 

[Jumper Geo]

I will be at peace so as much shit I have put up with I know they will really miss me so mine is aimed at giving them as much peace as I can and say sorry to my mum about 10 times and remind everyone how short and delicate life is and will see them soon.

Cheers

Geo

 

[WornOutLife]

I'll write to different people such as my dad, mom, brother, nephew, dog (yeah, he can read lol), students and my only friend.

There will be no hatred in them. I'll just explain to them that there shouldn't have to be sad about my death because this is really what I wanted. I'm gonna be happier even if I stop existing and there's nothing else waiting for me out there. Then. I'll just tell them how much I love them and wish them the best of luck with their lives in this weird universe.

Also, I might record some goodbye videos...

 

[Jumper Geo]

OMG, People will cash in on anything, buy a book and receive a free welfare check,

Amazon product ASIN B08JJVY6RB

Cheers

Geo

 

[TicoDK]

I'm leaving a letter to only one person, finished it one year ago, started more than one year prior.
I added some phrases from music and games we played together.
Just trying to say how important they've been to me and tell things I couldn't say in life.
But in the end, It's kinda lame tbh.

 

[S like Siren]

I love the words that a famous Italian writer, Cesare Pavese, wrote before committing suicide by swallowing a high dose of sleeping pills (when it was easy to die like this). He left these words written: "I forgive everyone and I ask forgiveness for everyone. Okay?don't do too much gossip about me and my death,please." I would like my privacy to be respected too.You know in the suicide news sometimes they put name and surname of the person,sometimes even photos.Anyway I don't think I'll leave a note probably nobody would give a damn about my last words.My advice for what it's worth is not to worry too much about what will happen next, who will do what, what they will do with your body.you will be in peace, that's the important thing. but I understand that people feel more confortable knowing that there will be arrangements for post death.

 

[Rue89]

I'm trying to write one to my family, telling them how I feel about them and how it isn't their fault, but it's hard. I didn't write one when I almost ctb'ed recently, and I don't know if I'll manage to write one for next time. I feel bad because it was easy to write one to them about my wish for them to keep my cat, but anything else directed to them is difficult to write. I wrote another one not directed to anyone specific, naming someone who is partially responsible. The reason I'm naming them is to hopefully ease my family's guilt, and there's no way my family could get at them so that doesn't matter. Otherwise I wouldn't mention anyone. I considered writing a note to/about another person who has hurt me, but isn't one of my reasons to ctb. I've decided that it's not worth possibly ruining their life over it.

 

[nightnightnitrite]

Most people don't read notes because it's too hard and if they do choose to read it, seeing too much blame on them would most likely be the reason they stop reading it. I'm thinking of writing the reasons I am CTB but including the reasons why I think they did the things to me and saying I understand.

Example: I hate 'Paul' for putting his hands on me and you allowing him too but I understand at your age and losing my dad(his husband) that you need somebody because you have always been scared of being alone.

Basically slightly passive aggressive but understanding? I don't know if this is the best way to go about things but it's the way I have been thinking especially as I near my CTB date.

 

[onthelastday]

 

[Katiewoo13]

I want my family and friends to have as much solace as possible in my passing, for example using a peaceful method, not in the house, make sure the authorities fine me not my loved ones. If this means leaving notes, that's what I want to do. But it's hard to know how to lighten the burden for them or what will be helpful. I'm definitely acting really normal so they won't suspect and later wish they had done something differently. Writing my notes is making me cry. I don't like goodbyes.

 

[i want peace]

I have written mine but the longer I wait the more I keep adding to them, they are gonna be 200 pages books in a few days time! I've written ones to my family saying how sorry I am and explaining my reasons, they know about my terrible anxiety and such problems but it will still come as a shock. I've also explained to them about my recent breakup and how that has pushed me over the edge.

I've written a letter to the guy I was seeing telling him how much he has hurt me and that I hope he treats people better in the future. I don't know if he'll read it or just tell people I was some kind of psycho but secretly I really want it to hurt him. I know that sounds bad but he should suffer like I am. I gave him lots of money to help pay his rent and he won't even give me any of it back, even after I found out he was cheating on me. That money could pay for my funeral.