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pellisetossium

pellisetossium

Member
Oct 28, 2025
6
I'm curious about something that's happened to me my entire life and I wanted to see if it was a common feeling.
I'm 23 years old. I've had multiple romantic relationships, hookups, flings, all that, but I've never been in love with someone and I don't think I even have access to that feeling.
When I first started dating in my teens, I saw it as a "next stage" of friendship. "I appreciate this person so much that I'm going to do all these things that are reserved for a special someone with them". I never felt anything more than fleeting crushes on people that I maybe found a little bit more attractive or smart than the average person, and they went away as soon as the came. When people pursued me, I appreciated the attention, but it wasn't enough to make me interested. To this day, it's not difficult for me to feel attracted to someone, but I can never make the feeling last.
I have deep friendships that have taken years to form with people that I know I love and admire deeply. I love my line of work. I love the music I listen to, the books that I read, my family, my cat. I know love and I think I hold a lot of it, but I can never turn it into romance.
Not knowing how it's gonna end for me, at first I was preoccupied with the fact I was going to die while not having loved anyone, but I don't really care much for that now.
I don't know if there's something wrong with me. It feels like everyone had a meeting without me on how love should feel like.
 
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Macedonian1987

Macedonian1987

Just a sad guy from Macedonia.
Oct 22, 2025
265
In my entire life I was truly and madly in love with a woman only once. This happened to me when I was 13-14 years old. I was not depressed yet at that age. Then at the age of 16 my depression appeared and started ruining my life. It was then that I lost the capacity to truly love anyone. I had many crushes afterwards and one night stands, but I never really loved any woman ever again.

The only woman I ever loved didn't love me back, and many years later I found that she was a lesbian. Talk about having bad luck.

(Disclaimer: I have nothing against lesbians)
 
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