so long farewell alvederzane goodbye!

[Dazedandconfused32]

So as it goes I'm writing this to say goodbye and to thank all of the wonderful people I've met on here. I've had the pleasure of meeting some of the kindest folks that I've ever met in my life here. It saddens me to think that if I had met some of you irl that I more than likely would have never visited this site. I am here though so there's no point in focusing on what could've been. I started my meto regimen two days ago but have run into a few side effects with EPS symptoms. A lot with my mouth and jaw to where I've been clenching and unable to stop awkwardly moving, flexing and or twitching. I don't know how to really explain it but I've been taking Benadryl to combat those effects. Tomorrow morning I will be finished with the regimen and be able to then consume my N.

I was really excited and relieved this morning but having to wrap a few things up with selling my car and getting an Uber back to the hotel was a bit of a challenge. I guess it feels kind of surreal now. I'm pretty exhausted so that's why I'm going to attempt in the morning. I'm a little nervous that something may backfire and I will fail but I don't think I've left any window of opportunity for failure. I'm very sad for the ones I'm going to miss and how much I know I'm going to break the hearts of the ones that I love :(. I've never wanted to hurt anyone with my decision and it kills me to think about. I know I'm ready though and thankfully I have the appropriate means to do so. Anyways, I guess that's all I have for now. I'm finally ready to leave the world that has treated my exceptionally unkind. I no longer have to be lonely, hurt or in pain anymore. I can find my peace. I love you all, thank you for everything.

-Dazed.

-On a side note to the mods, I will be self-banning in the morning once I'm finally ready to catch my bus. Thank you <3

 

[Soul]

I'm sorry life hasn't been a better fit, and hope all your next steps go smoothly and lead to good outcomes. Journey well x

 

[LegaliseIt!]

Sending Peaceful and Comforting thoughts.

 

[SinisterKid]

I thought you must have left when I was not around. I just cant help myself and break into song when I see your name pop up around the place.

Please take care of you for the rest of the time you have left. The peace is there, I have experienced it. Its seductive and welcoming. If that is what you seek, I hope that is what you find.

 

[Dazedandconfused32]

I thought you must have left when I was not around. I just cant help myself and break into song when I see your name pop up around the place.

Please take care of you for the rest of the time you have left. The peace is there, I have experienced it. Its seductive and welcoming. If that is what you seek, I hope that is what you find.

Oh such a seductive peace indeed, thank you <3

 

[realjunes]

You wrote:
I no longer have to be lonely, hurt or in pain anymore. I can find my peace. - We don't know one another, but I am touched by your post and if this is your final choice, you have my 100% support, love, and wish that indeed the days of loneliness, hurt, and pain end with eternal peace for you.

 

[Dazedandconfused32]

You wrote:
I no longer have to be lonely, hurt or in pain anymore. I can find my peace. - We don't know one another, but I am touched by your post and if this is your final choice, you have my 100% support, love, and wish that indeed the days of loneliness, hurt, and pain end with eternal peace for you.

Thank you, to you as well if that is what you so choose. Feeling heartbroken right now. Idk why. I guess just feeling that I've failed everyone and they've failed me.

 

[passenger27]

Good luck to you and smooth sailing. May the seas be calmer ahead.

 

[Moony21]

I wish you a peaceful journey

 

[Ark]

I hope you find the peace you deserve no matter what. If you want to talk about anything please feel free to do so. If you are absolutely sure of your path you have my support no matter what for what it's worth.

 

[realjunes]

Thank you, to you as well if that is what you so choose. Feeling heartbroken right now. Idk why. I guess just feeling that I've failed everyone and they've failed me.

Please know you can reach out to any members if you wish to right now

Thank you, to you as well if that is what you so choose. Feeling heartbroken right now. Idk why. I guess just feeling that I've failed everyone and they've failed me.

Dazed,
The feelings you feel right now are absolutely to be expected, and many here share those feelings. You know you can decide whatever you want. If you wish, you can reach out to any member now to chat or you can chill. While life no doubt failed you, you can be comforted I hope that none of ever consider you a failure, you are of value to us. Witness the fact that right now, this moment, there are over 75 people on this thread to support you in any decision you make. Love and peace to you my friend.

 

[PetiteAngel]

Safe journey ..Hope to meet you on the other side one day

 

[999888]

Good luck!

 

[Farmmaa]

Wishing you peace.

Just one concern though... if you're waiting until morning and staying in a hotel, is it not more likely to be found too soon by staff ?

 

[Dazedandconfused32]

Wishing you peace.

Just one concern though... if you're waiting until morning and staying in a hotel, is it not more likely to be found too soon by staff ?

The checkout time is at noon and I plan on going around 6:30-7:00 hopefully. That leaves me a good 5 hours to be found. I'm assuming from what I've read with N it'll be more than enough. If anyone has any literature that says otherwise I'd be more than interested to see what they say. Thank you

 

[Grandexit]

May you find peace and joy on the other side. I'm sorry this world has failed you, may you be greeted with the warmth and happiness in the hereafter. Safe and comfortable travels to you.

 

[Squiddy]

I wish you peace

 

[jgm63]

If you choose to proceed, then Safe travels

 

[Weakling666]

Fly high, don't look back. Happy for your upcoming peace.

 

[Azzy69]

good luck

 

[Jean4]

Awwww. I'm going to miss you. I hope everything goes right and you will be at peace.

 

[less than]

I wish you a safe and painless journey whatever you'll do at last. Hope you'll find for what you search. We are here for you.

 

[Dazedandconfused32]

Awwww. I'm going to miss you. I hope everything goes right and you will be at peace.

I'm going to miss you too, please take care of you as I know you've been hit tremendously hard as of late. My thoughts are with you also. Peace be to you as well <3

 

[SuicidalSymphonies]

Really going to miss seeing your posts and texts. I am sorry this world has not done you justice.

Man, this is hard to write. You are beautiful inside and out. Thank you for all of the conversations we had and moments we spent together.

I wish you only peace and I'm sending my whole heart right now. I love you lots. xoxoxoxo

 

[Dazedandconfused32]

Really going to miss seeing your posts and texts. I am sorry this world has not done you justice.

Man, this is hard to write. You are beautiful inside and out. Thank you for all of the conversations we had and moments we spent together.

I wish you only peace and I'm sending my whole heart right now. I love you lots. xoxoxoxo

I'm going to miss you too girly. Keep your head up. You've been such a good friend in my time here. I wish you peace also. Hugs and love <3

 

[TowerUpright]

Go in peace, and have a safe journey.

 

[Jean4]

I'm going to miss you too, please take care of you as I know you've been hit tremendously hard as of late. My thoughts are with you also. Peace be to you as well <3

Please say hi to Stan for me, and bring him popcorn. ;)

 

[Dazedandconfused32]

Please say hi to Stan for me, and bring him popcorn. ;)

Gah! Instant tears. I'll bring the good popcorn with extra butter <3

 

[SuicidalSymphonies]

Gah! Instant tears. I'll bring the good popcorn with extra butter <3

That's the best kind.. Hey, maybe I'll bring leftover cake after my birthday. It probably doesn't expire in the afterlife. x

 

[Dazedandconfused32]

That's the best kind.. Hey, maybe I'll bring leftover cake after my birthday. It probably doesn't expire in the afterlife. x

:o I'd gladly take some! I totally forgot about my birthday. So much else on my mind.