Venting she is fine without me, but im not, so i need to ctb.

[lovelulu]

My FP is totally fine without me during the if we dont talk at all or we're dry. It's obvious to me that she doesn't really care if we talk or not—and it makes me seem like a fool and retarded. Im not trying to make it seem like shes the one in the wrong whatsoever, just that if I can't handle being away from her—then my only solution is death. That's the only way I can truly leave her alone. I feel bad for her, having to deal with someone who won't even let you have alone time. Truly, I need to fucking kill myself already. I have the materials, I believe I will be doing it soon. She'll finally be away from me soon.

 

[userisinactive]

This isn't my post but I honestly think I'm feeling something similar
And as much as I wish I was one of those people that just see random health issues, look at the symptoms and diagnose then be wrong, I'm not
And I hate it
I hate having this much...love for someone and I have to what? Lock it up?
It's not my fault I fell for you and now I'm in literal pain and I know we won't be good together but it's still insane because why does it feel like I need to kill myself when we're not together?

 

[ih34rty0u]

i also have BPD and i get you, your feelings are totally valid. people say "live for yourself" but i just can't function on my own, i become way too attached to every person i get close to. my whole existence is dependent on them. my FP who is my only friend has been very cold and distant lately, it's making me spiral. why aren't my feelings ever reciprocated?? i always care, but no one cares about me. it doesn't matter if im dead or not, and i really wish i was dead right now..

 

[Leorio Paradinight]

why aren't my feelings ever reciprocated?? i always care, but no one cares about me.

This hits so close to home. Things go so well, I get attached and then it's just a matter of time until they become disillusioned with me. They're okay with being strangers now while my entire life is falling apart...