Self-Sabotaging your Life?

[lacrimosa]

Are any of you self-sabotaging your life so you end up in a position where death is certain or you have no option left but to CTB?

Are any of you self-sabotaging your life so you end up in a position where death is certain or you have no option left but to CTB?

For example, I have sleep apnea and will not get a CPAP machine. I know I will eventually stop breathing in my sleep if it gets worse.

 

[matheus]

Are any of you self-sabotaging your life so you end up in a position where death is certain or you have no option left but to CTB?

For example, I have sleep apnea and will not get a CPAP machine. I know I will eventually stop breathing in my sleep if it gets worse.

oi lacrimosa, I'm going through the same situation and I have blackouts for not sleeping, the biggest hell is the fact that even the most experienced doctor tells me it's fucking anxiety, being that I did everything recommended and I don't see a problem in taking medication, but I've already stopped why besides not being that I can't do my exercises because I'm extremely tired and CPAP is extremely expensive and I can't breathe like I can anymore before it's horrible.
(sorry for the english i translated)

 

[kyhoti]

Hey, at least you are aware of it. I fucked myself sideways with a red-hot poker and thought everything was peachy. Multiple times. I'm paying the piper now, which is just shoving me right towards that ledge. I call it "suicide on the installment plan". Now that dying is right in my face, it seems kinda fucky.

 

[kindalone]

Felt a lump near my testicles 5 years ago and it's still there. Haven't been to the doctor because of it and don't care to. It might be nothing, it might be something. Whatever.

 

[sserafim]

I refuse to get a job even though my normie family tries to force me to. They want to push me into wageslavery. They already gave me an eviction letter back in February, so they can evict me at any time. They use this as a blank check to force me into doing things. I don't know why they're so unaccepting of me and against me being a NEET. Probably because it goes against social norms and they're from a conformist and collectivist culture (East Asian). My options are NEET or rope, and I'll probably rope at the end of the road. I don't want to become a wagie

 

[UnluckyBastard]

I wouldn't really call it "self sabotage" as much as it is just giving up and not trying anything anymore. I probably should, though.

 

[lacrimosa]

Yeah, decided to stop taking my diabetes medication but then SI kicks in and I'm like fuck... I want to die so bad... Always wishing for a car collision or a fatal accident to cross paths with me.

 

[astr4]

quit my job quit therapy quit my friends so i'm more motivated to quit life

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I'm not really doing anything to self sabotage my life. I don't hate myself hence I don't see why I should make my life more worse than what it already is. Besides, life itself has already agreed to forcibly make my existence more and more worse the longer I live. I don't need to do any self sabotaging because me merely existing in this world is already a path down sabotage. The longer I live, the worse my life gets overall

 

[sisyphean-nightmare]

Two huge ass dental infections and I don't brush my teeth. I also don't see a dentist, but that's not intentional. It's because of PTSD.

 

[hopelessoceanic25]

I'm letting my anorexia take the reigns. Ended up in the hospital with a survival rate of "possibility" a year ago; maybe this time it'll be guaranteed I'll be a goner eventually.

 

[sisyphean-nightmare]

I'm letting my anorexia take the reigns. Ended up in the hospital with a survival rate of "possibility" a year ago; maybe this time it'll be guaranteed I'll be a goner eventually.

Anorexia gang

 

[CantDoIt]

I'm not neglecting my health but I have suspicious freckle I'm purposefully not getting checked. I keep wishing I had some kind of severe health problem that I wouldn't have to ctb because it would be easier, I would make people feel as guilty, etc. But if I do too much to myself I'll feel like even worse garbage.