• Hey Guest,

    We wanted to share a quick update with the community.

    Our public expense ledger is now live, allowing anyone to see how donations are used to support the ongoing operation of the site.

    👉 View the ledger here

    Over the past year, increased regulatory pressure in multiple regions like UK OFCOM and Australia's eSafety has led to higher operational costs, including infrastructure, security, and the need to work with more specialized service providers to keep the site online and stable.

    If you value the community and would like to help support its continued operation, donations are greatly appreciated. If you wish to donate via Bank Transfer or other options, please open a ticket.

    Donate via cryptocurrency:

    Bitcoin (BTC):
    Ethereum (ETH):
    Monero (XMR):
angelkissed

angelkissed

Member
Jun 8, 2026
22
Hello everypony

I'm considering having a long-time respected member who is incredibly informative help document the effects of me taking SN when I "CTB".

Any volunteers that fit the desc. for this would be appreciated. If this is simply for morbid curiosity or because you're some disgusting "gore" watcher and get off on watching another person die, then please leave me alone. You're the last person I want to see me be alive in my final moments.

I want a human who is empathetic and understands how this can inform people to make a safer and more peaceful informed decision and to document SN death closely. No human deserves to have a terrifying or painful death when they're already suffering. I cannot stress enough that this is truly not to encourage anyone to follow my footsteps. Please don't. I still don't know if this is immoral or not.

This is not in any way to encourage others to follow in my footsteps. I would feel awful if my process convinces someone out there to take their own life

This should be happening in around 2 months. No set date yet.

I'm specifically going to go off the peaceful pill guidebook's protocol, however there will be one singular difference as the benzos listed and encouraged to take, are not accessible online nor in person so I may have to experiment with Oxy's or Xanax and figure out the dosage.

I have never done pills before so I will need whoever is documenting this to help me in the process.


This is not something I want recorded at all. I want the person to help document the before process, during process, and after "ctb" process in timestamps while everything is happening.

In 2020 there was a thread for @Moonicide which a dear friend of hers documented everything. In the same format, I'd need it to be formatted the *exact* same way. I hope this is making sense.

However in the thread, her last words she ended up softly uttering "fuck, fuck, fuck" and there is no way to verify what she was feeling at that moment.

i hope i can maybe offer more insight. And I know i will be scared, and i don't want to back out. So having someone to call for my final moments will put my fear of dying alone at ease.

I would like this person to be someone I can form a semi bond with and feel safe around.

Please comment if you are interested.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Praestat_Mori
H

hdead

Member
Jun 2, 2026
73
I'd be happy to have a conversation with you about this. Not saying I will do this, but as somebody who is also considering SN and heavily invested in dignity in passing I consider this.
 

Similar threads

youremy
Replies
1
Views
113
Suicide Discussion
FiryPheonix
FiryPheonix
angelkissed
Replies
3
Views
139
Suicide Discussion
darksouls
darksouls
halfstay
Replies
8
Views
414
Suicide Discussion
imitoto
imitoto