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mashka9

mashka9

Member
Oct 4, 2023
47
like 2, ab to get released from a psych ward today lol
 
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SeaBreeze

SeaBreeze

Suicideation?
Jul 11, 2023
146
7 yesterday
6 today
Periodontal appointment tomorrow...
 
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LifeTransit_1

LifeTransit_1

Death is inevitable. I just want mine early.
Oct 25, 2023
110
5 right now... though it has gone to a 9 earlier this year tbh.
 
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Heading to Darkness

Heading to Darkness

Member
Oct 29, 2023
85
1 is very low suicidality, 10 is very extreme acute suicidality. I miss the old thread (which is deleted) that is way I want to revive him.

My suicidal thoughts today are a 4. I have some distractions and responsibilities which prevent more of these thoughts.
definately 10 I ctb today
 
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LivedTooLong

LivedTooLong

Avoidant
Apr 26, 2018
157
8-9. Really struggling.
 
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U

user56765567

In recovery and getting help
Oct 1, 2023
154
8-9
 
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Y

Yaffle

Life’s a bitch
Nov 9, 2023
398
Solid 9 right now
 
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N

Nobody1

Member
Nov 15, 2023
5
During the day I fake that I'm happy and everyone thinks that I'm always so happy. When I'm finally alone I would rate it a 9. I would be dead already if I wasn't so scared. I will be gone soon.
 
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P

Praestat_Mori

Mori praestat, quam haec pati!
May 21, 2023
12,771
currently 5

still suicidal but no urge to do it soon, although it'd be better to be gone.
 
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tiger b

tiger b

AI without the I
Oct 24, 2023
1,230
3

Big improvement from a week ago.
 
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A

anxious_depressive

I'm in despair
Dec 21, 2021
240
8
 
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maka

maka

this is for you, mi cuervito 𓇢𓆸
Apr 23, 2019
177
10. Tired of seeing everyone else with loved ones while I have to navigate this world entirely alone. I kept listening to the assholes saying it would get better but honestly I should've just gotten it over with when I was 11 and it was easier.
 
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Heartaches

Heartaches

Don't say a prayer for me now
May 6, 2021
270
7. Everytime I think I'll finally find my place in this world, I end up more disappointed than before; I feel lonelier, more pathethic, depressed, hopeless. I think I'm good for nothing. I'd prefer if things just ended now, I'm barely functional and have a hard time getting any type of help.​
 
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K

Kit1

Enlightened
Oct 24, 2023
1,097
9. Just want to be dead. The pain is non stop now and probably will need to end my life soon as I cannot access treatment.
 
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Lullaby

Lullaby

🌙
Mar 9, 2022
682
10 - more than anything, I wish had the courage to end it now. I hate this so much
 
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hopelessoceanic25

hopelessoceanic25

Agony.
Nov 29, 2023
68
Around an 8 today.
 
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haibane

haibane

Reki
Sep 27, 2023
257
10, if i had a reliable method to ctb i would do it immediately. I dont see any positive outcomes from living any longer.
 
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huphup

huphup

Student
Dec 2, 2023
117
I think 6-7, but starting new meds so could go up :)
 
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SeaBreeze

SeaBreeze

Suicideation?
Jul 11, 2023
146
7 yesterday
9 today
 
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alienoforces

alienoforces

Member
Jun 30, 2023
9
it usually varies between 7-9, maybe a 6 on a good day. suicidal ideation is something i've really struggled with since i was young, so i don't see that changing anytime soon lol.
 
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N

noname223

Archangel
Aug 18, 2020
6,044
4. The next few weeks gonna be a nightmare. I have to study so fucking hard for the exams. I get pretty depressed by it. I got paranoid in my self-help group. It was pretty crazy. My paranoid thoughts changed a lot pretty fast. I had the hope a woman there would like me. But I think her interest in me stopped when I talked about my illness which hurts pretty much. But I still cling to the hope she might give me a chance.
However I cannot go there anymore (for now). Thoughts about love stress me so fucking much. I cannot handle that combined with the exams.

I invest money in my style and outer appearance but when I talk about my really big issues the women run away...Holy shit I pray I die soon. I am losing a lot of weight. As a countermeasure I eat sweets and very unhealthy food. But I keep losing weight which is weird. I hope it is something that is lethal, peaceful and fast. I won't go to a doctor. The stresses probably only fucked up my feeling of hunger. I forget to eat. But still this is very very weird. The last time I ate this unhealthy is a decade ago. I think my body shows symptoms of a severe deterioration because of the mental agony.
 
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S

SMmetalhead36

Ready to have my forever date with suicide
Oct 6, 2023
333
8.5-9
 
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Fktw0rld

Fktw0rld

An end with suffering > Suffering without an end
Aug 29, 2022
404
About a 4 today. But I need to get focused because my deadline is approaching 🤦
 
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