Rate your suicidal thoughts thread (1-10)

[TheCyberian]

8/10. It's the only thing I've been thinking about for days now. The only reason it's not higher is because I'm not actively hurting myself or impulsively trying to CTB right now.

 

[Per Ardua Ad Astra]

10

 

[fettuccinenoodle]

10 trying to black out in the tub as we speak

 

[BipolarExpress]

I'd give it a 4 or 5 right now, since my depression is starting to lift. Or so I hope, anyway. (This past weekend, I would have given it an 8.)

 

[GetMeOut]

Currently my every waking thought. The next two weeks will be critical. It might sound bizarre, but if I can survive in my job till New Year, things might ease right up again, at least for a while. A tumultuous period.

 

[its-about-time]

10 is pulling the trigger for me. This week, probably a 7 or 8. Just dropped to like a 1 though. My gf, the person I care most about hurting, just tonight is experiencing the death of a person close to her, and seeing her pain just…. I never want to do that to her, ever. I'm still a 7 or 8 suicidal but a 0 or 1 realistically wanting to go through with the actual deed. I just don't want to cause that much pain, maybe I'd rather suffer for a lifetime.

 

[Meaninglessness]

Need to remove meaningless pain: 10
Need of suicide: 8
Survival instinct: 10

 

[Little T]

10 - I want to go tonight.
Just frustrated with wraping up lose ends & being so tired in the process. Property, too much junk and a little dog.
It's about timing so my best friend doesn't have to miss work.
As it will take at least two days to be found, at least I will have time to try again.

 

[BipolarExpress]

It's a 7 today.

 

[Lonerzepam]

10 like everyday with this demonic illness (hppd). Hope someday it'll be different. Not much hope left though.

Need to remove meaningless pain: 10
Need of suicide: 8
Survival instinct: 10

Shit hit hard..

 

[Need2BFree]

10', I have anhedonia/ cant feel pleasure. on top of that o have a constant sense of impending doom

I'm the same I have anhedonia and impending doom constant feel I'm on defense/fearful mode.
It's a 10 for me

 

[Lostblackchild]

9

 

[ger3172]

definitely 8. don't wanna do this anymore and I'm barely putting effort into doing daily tasks, but lack energy to ctb

 

[Venom85]

More than 10, even because I just ordered SN .

 

[friendofbirds]

6.5 / 7 ish, i hate this time of year. i miss my mom

 

[nochu]

8 but SI is 10.

 

[Dead Ghost]

6 again

 

[Per Ardua Ad Astra]

10

 

[Wannagonow]

At the moment...8. If I had the means it would be higher.

 

[Neverfeltdeader]

A hard 10.

 

[actual_fox]

today 4-5, yesterday I was 8

 

[BipolarExpress]

Let's call it an 8 today.

 

[Regret]

1

 

[Berk]

9/10, planning Sn method, all that remains is to achieve it and find someone to take care of my dog...

 

[noname223]

Weird day. Basically have not learned anything for college. But college at the same time wasted my whole day.

Took a half benzo. I don't go into details because I am paranoid. I came home late which was pretty bad for my health. I am just so vulnerable and fragile.

Though the benzo helps a lot to ease my anxiety. Though they are dangerous as fuck.

Suicidality 4,5.

 

[DysphoriaKilledMe]

I don't know. I am just considering going through with it tonight. I wrote out the suicide note, but I have mixed feelings.

 

[Why Me?]

I'm at a 10. CTB is not what I want to do, but it makes sense, especially after what I just experienced at the dentist this morning... I don't need to go thru continual hell with no reward, just crisis and desperation. I need relief from this life once and for all, why wait?

 

[Sapphire]

I am at a 10.

 

[BipolarExpress]

10. SI is about a 2; I'm hanging by a thread.

 

[Per Ardua Ad Astra]

10