Apolgis tht ths = lng - am awre tht = dffclt t/ read
Ok lk
Thre = reasn Y ppl wh/ wnt2 join SaSu jst 't/ hlp ppl' r rejectd durng registratn
& slf am sayng ths as a persn wh/ = workng incrdbly hrd t/ buld up sme propr comprhnsve recvry rsourcs t/ gve as mny ppl chnces @ recvry as pssble
No1 mnds gnuine postvty - a gd xample of a postve postr = @whywere - thy oftn pst postve & Ncourgng msgs t/ ppl & shw thm tht thy mattr & r valud
Wht ppl d/ nt rspond wll 2 = b-ing tld tht thy cn recovr & havng recvry pushd on thm b/ sme1 wh/ knws nothng abt thr stuatn - anothr persn wld nt accpt slf issus recntly & thn whn slf xplaind tht recvry = nt an optn thy bcme condescndng & patrnisng bcse apprntly thy knw bettr -- tht xpernce ws gnuinly dstressng & if n.ethng mde slf suicdalty mch wrse
Thre = nothng wrng wth offrng t/ listn t/ ppl -- slf oftn usd t/ msg ppl in d.ms & tll thm tht slf knw of altern8tve thrpis if thy wre intrestd & wantd t/ knw mre -- ppl wre oftn gr8tfl & receptve bcse slf ws respctng thm whre thy wre & respctng thr chce t/ tke info or rfuse
Am sre tht wht u hve bn thru ws horrifc & slf d/ nt doubt tht fr secnd - bt am also gttng impressn tht bcse u survivd wht u thght ws th/ wrse thng pssble thn evry1 els cn -- ppl d/ nt join SaSu bcse thy wnt t/ b tld xyz -- ppl join SaSu bcse thy wn2 b listnd 2 bcse tht ds nt happn n.ewhre els fr mst ppl
Ppl r tryn2 tll u ths in mny diffrnt wys bt stll u r sayng tht u wll pst 'postivty' on suicde dscussn threds & tll ppl tht thy cn recovr whn all thy wnt = 2 t/ b herd
Mst ppl d/ nt wnt postvty - thy wnt empthy
Offr ppl spport if tht = wht u wn2 d/ bt pls d/ nt tlk @ ppl as tho u knw mre abt thr lves thn thy d/ -- givng 'postvty' jst mkes mny ppl fl as tho thy r b-ing talkd ovr & wht thy r sayng = fallng on def ears & thse feelngs of isolatn invaldatn & failre jst cntinu
Thse r th/ xperncs tht ppl join sasu t/ avd
Translated version, to avoid any misunderstandings and to make it an easier read:
Apologies that this might be challenging to read. I am aware that it's difficult to understand.
Okay, look,
There's a reason why people who want to join SaSu just to "help people" are rejected during registration.
And I say this as a person who is working incredibly hard to build up some proper comprehensive recovery resources to give as many people chances at recovery as possible.
No one minds genuine positivity - a good example of a positive poster is
@whywere - they often post positive and encouraging messages to people and show them that they matter and are valued.
What people do not respond well to is being told that they can recover and having recovery pushed on them by someone who knows nothing about their situation. Another person would not accept self-issues recently, and then when self explained that recovery is not an option, they became condescending and patronizing. That experience was genuinely distressing, and if anything made self-suicidality much worse.
There's nothing wrong with offering to listen to people. Self often used to message people in DMs and tell them that self knows of alternative therapies if they were interested and wanted to know more. People were often grateful and receptive because self was respecting them where they were and respecting their choice to take information or refuse.
I am sure what you have been through was horrific, and self does not doubt that for a second. But I am also getting the impression that because you survived what you thought was the worst thing possible, everyone else can too. People do not join SaSu because they want to be told XYZ; people join SaSu because they want to be listened to because that does not happen anywhere else for most people.
People are trying to tell you this in many different ways, but still, you are saying that you will post 'positivity' on suicide discussion threads and tell people that they can recover when all they want is to be heard.
Most people do not want positivity - they want empathy.
Offer people support if that is what you want to do, but please do not talk at people as though you know more about their lives than they do. Giving 'positivity' just makes many people feel as though they are being talked over, and what they are saying is falling on deaf ears, and these feelings of isolation, invalidation, and failure just continue.
These are the experiences that people join SaSu to avoid.