not wanting to die is so depressing

[listeningpost1379]

Times have been so hard. My life has always been wild but I've had the worst luck this year. I used to take solace in the idea that if I cannot live, I could just die. But I've come to enjoy living. In a time like this, the helplessness and anxiety become unbearable. It's so stressful. I am so tired. Most people have no trouble maintaining their lives, why does it have to be so hard for me?

 

[WornOutLife]

Because, unfortunately, this world is very unfair, dear.
Hope you can feel better soon because it seems you really wanna live.

Hugs and love,

Matt

 

[FuneralCry]

Life literally is exhausting, and can be cruel to us. Things never seem to go our way. Our own thoughts can torture us, I know what that is like. I hope you find relief.

 

[listeningpost1379]

Thank you both for the kind words... It's literally so hard to live :( I am stuck overseas during Covid and running out of money and visa options. My personal life unrelated to Covid has been most eventful in the worst way. I managed for over a year but this bad luck streak has been unbelievable and now a thousand things are crashing slowly and painfully. Borders closed for at least another year. If I were at home I'd still be broke and struggling but at least I have the right to get a job and my existence won't become illegal... It's not that we want to die isnt it, fate just really really wants some of us dead :(

 

[down for the count]

Yeah, I want to live most of the time. After leaving the house for must do tasks I come back depressed from my experiences . I then lie in bed. I don't want to die but there is no other way to correct the unfairness.