Venting My situation

[-nobodyknows-]

Hello.

I've been suicidal for the last ten years. I've made attempts on my life multiple times, but never succeeded. I've tried getting help, but nothing really worked in the end.

I don't really have anyone. I'm awful at making friends, and even worse at attracting a romantic partner. I'm not close to my family; things were never the same when they found out I was like this.

At a few points in my life, I did have someone to stand by me. They always made things easier. They made me feel safe and wanted. But it never lasted long. I would always get too attached and drive them away.

I can't stand being alone. I want the "normie life" more than anything. I want to meet someone, get married, have kids, and die naturally. Unfortunately, I don't think that's in the cards for me, and I don't think that's something I can accept. I am just not that strong.

I hate that I am like this. I've tried so hard to be better, but something always happens that pushes me right back to where I started. I do my best to hope for the future, but considering where I am after all this time, I find it very difficult to believe that things ever will improve. I've already been told that I'll probably have these sorts of feelings for the rest of my life.

I don't know what to do anymore.

 

[Daryl72]

I can so relate to your story. I feel the same about my situation and it hasn't improved and after years and years of suffering I'm ready to go. I haven't made any attempts because I don't have a viable way to go with no money and other resources. I'm just at a point where I want it all to end and however i have to make that happen, I will have to do it. Just afraid of the pain involved with what methods I may be able to use.

 

[Wolf Girl]

I relate so strongly to your story. If you want, you are welcome to PM me. It has been helping ease my suffering to talk to people who understand. No need to suffer more than necessary while we're still stuck here.