Story My dad hit me with a knife

[letmeseethedeath]

guys I need your help. My dad just hit me with knife and beat me so hard in my head and kick me. the reason? I have severe depression. they don't accept my desire to do transition (Female to male). I have a severe trichotillomania and gender dysphoria. My parents always treat me like someone ill, like a shit while they're so worried about my brother (he just has fever). I want to escape from this house but I live so far away from anyone, I just wanna die. I already ordered SN but never arrived. My life sucks, depression is eating me alive. They want me dead. I need someone to talk, to help me with my shitty life. I love you all, you all, all this site SS is the ONLY REAL family I have

 

[MsM3talGamer]

guys I need your help. My dad just hit me with knife and beat me so hard in my head and kick me. the reason? I have severe depression. they don't accept my desire to do transition (Female to male). I have a severe trichotillomania and gender dysphoria. My parents always treat me like someone ill, like a shit while they're so worried about my brother (he just has fever). I want to escape from this house but I live so far away from anyone, I just wanna die. I already ordered SN but never arrived. My life sucks, depression is eating me alive. They want me dead. I need someone to talk, to help me with my shitty life. I love you all, you all, all this site SS is the ONLY REAL family I have

That sounds terrible. You can vent here as much as you like and we'll listen to you. The only practical advice I can offer is to call the police as this is assault. Alternatively, any friends or relatives who'd take you in? Hugs.

 

[Xerxes]

Use the knife to force your dad to transition from male to female.

 

[TiredHorse]

I am so sorry, @letmeseethedeath! That was definitely assault --with a deadly weapon, no less!-- and the police could be useful. Given your situation, I would probably give that a try. If you're a minor, Protective Services could also help; they have of late become keenly aware of the descrimination against the young trans community.

I haven't any idea where you're located, but if you're anywhere near a US metropolitan area, there might be trans groups who could safely extricate you from that life-threatening situation. I heard of a group in PDX that does rescues locally, but I don't know any details; they might have sister-organizations elsewhere.

I am so very, very sorry!

 

[Smilla]

Are there LGBT resources in your area whom you could contact for support?

 

[Johnnythefox]

I'm fairly certain this member is located in Italy.
I don't think the law enforcement there are too bothered about situations like this.

 

[Smilla]

https://www.lgbtcenters.org/LgbtCenters

This is a map of centers.

You have support here but I would explore the above organization for some practical help if you need it.

 

[letmeseethedeath]

That sounds terrible. You can vent here as much as you like and we'll listen to you. The only practical advice I can offer is to call the police as this is assault. Alternatively, any friends or relatives who'd take you in? Hugs.

my dad is recidive to jail but I tried so many times to call police they didn't care at all. Unfortunately no friends, they are all far away, I just want to escape from this house and kill myself in peace. I want to come back to my non existence

 

[TiredHorse]

Where are you in Italy, if revealing such information is acceptible?

I ask because I might have a resource there. Rome and Florence; maybe elsewhere. I'll need to make some enquiries.

 

[letmeseethedeath]

I am so sorry, @letmeseethedeath! That was definitely assault --with a deadly weapon, no less!-- and the police could be useful. Given your situation, I would probably give that a try. If you're a minor, Protective Services could also help; they have of late become keenly aware of the descrimination against the young trans community.

I haven't any idea where you're located, but if you're anywhere near a US metropolitan area, there might be trans groups who could safely extricate you from that life-threatening situation. I heard of a group in PDX that does rescues locally, but I don't know any details; they might have sister-organizations elsewhere.

I am so very, very sorry!

I live in Italy in a very lonely place, far away from people. I tried to go to a psychologist but he told me to don't think about transition lol I think he's transfobic

 

[letmeseethedeath]

https://www.lgbtcenters.org/LgbtCenters

This is a map of centers.

You have support here but I would explore the above organization for some practical help if you need it.

thank you so much

 

[letmeseethedeath]

Where are you in Italy, if revealing such information is acceptible?

I ask because I might have a resource there. Rome and Florence; maybe elsewhere. I'll need to make some enquiries.

omg yes I'm from italy, Abruzzo Please help me guys i just wanna die far away from my parents

 

[TiredHorse]

omg yes I'm from italy, Abruzzo Please help me guys i just wanna die far away from my parents

This resource of mine would not be to help you ctb --I cannot mention to her my intentions to ctb-- but she is Italian, both young and liberal, and may know of LGBTQ sanctuary resources on the ground there. And knowing that she is terrible at email communications, in hopes of getting a faster reply I took the liberty to sound her out:

"Dear X****,

An acquaintence of mine on an on-line forum, who lives in Italy, is having serious problems with his family: he is trans, still quite young, and his family has become physically abusive. The local police have resisted intervening. Do you happen to know of any national LGBTQ resources I could direct him to?

Many thanks, in advance.

Best,"

I will update my resource with your location as soon as she replies, should it be helpful.

 

[letmeseethedeath]

This resource of mine would not be to help you ctb --I cannot mention to her my intentions to ctb-- but she is Italian, both young and liberal, and may know of LGBTQ sanctuary resources on the ground there. And knowing that she is terrible at email communications, in hopes of getting a faster reply I took the liberty to sound her out:

"Dear X****,

An acquaintence of mine on an on-line forum, who lives in Italy, is having serious problems with his family: he is trans, still quite young, and his family has become physically abusive. The local police have resisted intervening. Do you happen to know of any national LGBTQ resources I could direct him to?

Many thanks, in advance.

Best,"

I will update my resource with your location as soon as she replies, should it be helpful.

I don't know how to thank you, i'm crying but this time is for happiness. thank you so much, I have no words, you're such a good person

 

[TiredHorse]

I don't know how to thank you, i'm crying but this time is for happiness. thank you so much, I have no words, you're such a good person

Hopefully my resource will reply soon. As I said, she isn't good about fast email replies --and even then, she might not have any good news. But I've got my fingers crossed.

Let's get you out of the hell you're stuck in. You can't make a sound decision whether or not to ctb when you can't reach any better alternative.

In boca lupo!

 

[Pegasus]

guys I need your help. My dad just hit me with knife and beat me so hard in my head and kick me. the reason? I have severe depression. they don't accept my desire to do transition (Female to male). I have a severe trichotillomania and gender dysphoria. My parents always treat me like someone ill, like a shit while they're so worried about my brother (he just has fever). I want to escape from this house but I live so far away from anyone, I just wanna die. I already ordered SN but never arrived. My life sucks, depression is eating me alive. They want me dead. I need someone to talk, to help me with my shitty life. I love you all, you all, all this site SS is the ONLY REAL family I have

So sorry OP. Good luck.

 

[Goldenwolf]

guys I need your help. My dad just hit me with knife and beat me so hard in my head and kick me. the reason? I have severe depression. they don't accept my desire to do transition (Female to male). I have a severe trichotillomania and gender dysphoria. My parents always treat me like someone ill, like a shit while they're so worried about my brother (he just has fever). I want to escape from this house but I live so far away from anyone, I just wanna die. I already ordered SN but never arrived. My life sucks, depression is eating me alive. They want me dead. I need someone to talk, to help me with my shitty life. I love you all, you all, all this site SS is the ONLY REAL family I have

I'm sorry for what happen to you. Hang in there. I hope you can get through it and hopefully get your peace soon. Sorry I can't be of more help but I want to show my support for you.

 

[letmeseethedeath]

Hopefully my resource will reply soon. As I said, she isn't good about fast email replies --and even then, she might not have any good news. But I've got my fingers crossed.

Let's get you out of the hell you're stuck in. You can't make a sound decision whether or not to ctb when you can't reach any better alternative.

In boca lupo!

Actually you are the best, you are making me smile

 

[letmeseethedeath]

So sorry OP. Good luck.

thank you, i need to come out of this hell

 

[letmeseethedeath]

I'm sorry for what happen to you. Hang in there. I hope you can get through it and hopefully get your peace soon. Sorry I can't be of more help but I want to show my support for you.

omg you all are making me cry, showing me support and love. thank you so much

 

[NotWorthLiving]

Oh My God!! I only just read this thread. That is so harsh. I'm so sorry @letmeseethedeath.

I you would like to talk, I'm a message away...

Hugs

 

[letmeseethedeath]

Oh My God!! I only just read this thread. That is so harsh. I'm so sorry @letmeseethedeath.

I you would like to talk, I'm a message away...

Hugs

Thank you for your support I'd like to talk to someone who won't judge me and understand me because a lot of people don't understand what I feel

 

[letmeseethedeath]

Some people are like "why do you call your self he/him? Lol"
Is that so hard to understand what is gender dysphoria? That def break my heart

 

[MsM3talGamer]

Some people are like "why do you call your self he/him? Lol"
Is that so hard to understand what is gender dysphoria? That def break my heart

You won't get judged for that here. I hope you can find an LGBT group to offer you some help and advice. Maybe you could even find another OP here with gender dysphoria to chat to. This community seems to be growing daily.

 

[NotWorthLiving]

Thank you for your support I'd like to talk to someone who won't judge me and understand me because a lot of people don't understand what I feel

Just message me if you want. I'm here.

 

[therhydler]

I'm really really sorry for your situation it sounds horrific. I can't do much but it you need to talk you can always PM me. I really hope things will change for you for the better... hang on in there

 

[TiredHorse]

I'm still waiting on a reply from my resource. As I said, she's slow on email. It might take a few days.

I just wanted you to know I haven't forgotten.

 

[Johnnythefox]

You're a superstar for doing that mate.

 

[TiredHorse]

Okay, here's what my resource replied:

"Dear [TiredHorse],

I am very sorry about your friend's situation, and unfortunately I don't think it is that uncommon in Italy. If he is underage he should contact the Telefono Azzurro [https://www.azzurro.it/] immediately; this is the national hotline for children and adolescents facing physical abuse at home and at school. They also have some online resources and chat forums that might be helpful. Unfortunately there is not yet a national hotline or an organisation specifically devoted to the protection of LGBTQ rights, but this group [http://www.risorselgbti.eu/] seems to be trying to start something like that and I'm sure they would be glad to talk to him if he reached out.

If he is not underage and is facing serious danger at home, then I would actually recommend that he contact the Telefono Rosa [https://www.telefonorosa.it/] - the national hotline for women facing abuse. "Femminicidio"— you can probably guess what that means—is a huge issue in Italy, and this organisation is at the centre of the fight against it as well as many other important feminist initiatives. Though your friend is not a woman, this group is a pretty liberal, open-minded lot (my emphasis --TH) who would probably be glad to help. Among the other resources they provide (including legal assistance and psychological support), they have several "safe homes" where victims of abuse can stay.

Where does your friend live? If he is in a city I might be able to find some local resources he could contact. But it sounds more like a small provincial town if even the police have refused to intervene.

Let me know how things go, and if there is anything else I can do to help.

Best,
X****"

I'll let her know you're in Abruzzo. She might have more specific resources for there.

Hang in there, @letmeseethedeath

 

[letmeseethedeath]

You won't get judged for that here. I hope you can find an LGBT group to offer you some help and advice. Maybe you could even find another OP here with gender dysphoria to chat to. This community seems to be growing daily.

i hope so, i can understand that for some people it's hard but i mean, i'm not killing anyone, i just want to be what i really feel to be