Help make it stop

[purplehearted]

i'm breaking down. in every way. crying, panicking, self harming.

it hurts to have to pretend to everyone that you're okay and happy when you're planning your exit. I just got my meto and i'm waiting for my SN to come in. My fucking god if i had that SN right now i would drown myself by drinking it all

does anyone know anything that could help with this because i don't want anyone to think something is off with me and get suspicious so i get saved. How do i act normal without feeling so hurt

The calm feeling everyone describes after choosing ctb IS NOT THE CASE For ME i feel so fucking guilty that i'm going to hurt people it's eating me up inside. what do i do how can i make this easier any advice please i threw up at the end of the day over the anxiety and stress of having to pretend whilst carrying this with me. i feel sick

 

[FuneralCry]

I would personally just try to avoid people as much as possible, but it does sound like a difficult situation to be in, knowing that you have to pretend to not wish to ctb around others, and it must be so tiring what you are going through. But it really is such a painful existence and I get that it can be torture having to be here when you suffer so much and just wish to leave so badly.

 

[purplehearted]

I would personally just try to avoid people as much as possible, but it does sound like a difficult situation to be in, knowing that you have to pretend to not wish to ctb around others, and it must be so tiring what you are going through. But it really is such a painful existence and I get that it can be torture having to be here when you suffer so much and just wish to leave so badly.

When i try avoiding people, alarm bells ring for them bc that's not my usual personality. but i'll try this, thank you. it's too painful pretending to be myself. i shouldn't be suffering more than i have to but i'm terrified of getting caught

 

[freedompass]

I would personally just try to avoid people as much as possible, but it does sound like a difficult situation to be in, knowing that you have to pretend to not wish to ctb around others, and it must be so tiring what you are going through. But it really is such a painful existence and I get that it can be torture having to be here when you suffer so much and just wish to leave so badly.

FC go to the top of the class

This gal…

If I was gonna post a song for her it would be something with 'star' in the title

(SaSu is her job btw)