• Hey Guest,

    As you know, censorship around the world has been ramping up at an alarming pace. The UK and OFCOM has singled out this community and have been focusing its censorship efforts here. It takes a good amount of resources to maintain the infrastructure for our community and to resist this censorship. We would appreciate any and all donations.

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Sakura.

Sakura.

Chciałbym, żeby wszystko się już skończyło.
May 1, 2024
69
I'm looking for friends in my country - Poland - so I'm posting in Polish.

***

Cześć!

Mam 22 lata, jestem mężczyzną. Mam depresję i skrajnie siebie nienawidzę. Nie mam żadnych przyjaciół i kompletnie marnuję sobie życie. Cierpię na tragiczne zaburzenie lęku społecznego, który zniszczył mi moje życie, całkowicie uniemożliwiając mi normalne funkcjonowanie.

W przeszłości byłem skrajnie dręczony przez swoich rówieśników, co całkowicie i nieodwracalnie zrujnowało mi moją psychikę i najprawdopodobniej jest przyczyną wspomnianego lęku społecznego. Najprawdopodobniej, ponieważ nie jest niestety całkowicie wykluczone, że cierpię na niezdiagnozowany zespół Aspergera albo inne zaburzenie ze spektrum autyzmu.

Kiedy przestałem być dręczony przez swoich rówieśników, to w zamian stałem się im całkowicie obojętny. Nikt nie chce mieć ze mną nic do czynienia. Nawet jeżeli udałoby mi się znaleźć w moim otoczeniu życzliwsze mi osoby, które byłyby w stanie mnie zaakceptować, to i tak niczego by to nie zmieniło, ponieważ mój lęk społeczny, moja nienawiść własna i całkowity brak samoakceptacji uniemożliwia mi nawiązywanie i utrzymywanie normalnych przyjacielskich kontaktów.

***

Nie mam żadnych pasji i zainteresowań, nie mam żadnych przyjaciół, zupełnie marnuję sobie życie.

Studiuję niezwykle wymagający kierunek, przez co muszę w pełni skupiać się na nauce. Zupełnie mi to nie wychodzi, jednak nawet kiedy się nie uczę, to i tak nie robię czegokolwiek sensownego i marnuję cały swój wolny czas.

Bardzo chciałbym jednak być wartościowym człowiekiem. Kiedy tylko (niezwykle rzadko...) mam do tego warunki, to oglądam filmy i czytam książki - wartościowe, przygnębiające, poruszające, melancholijne i nostalgiczne. Lubię również zapoznawać się z treściami o charakterze edukacyjnym i popularnonaukowym.

Kocham Japonię. Z powodów wymienionych wyżej nie mam jednak możliwości, by oglądać anime, czytać mangi i light novele oraz grać w powieści wizualne. Bardzo lubię jednak się nimi interesować - zapoznawanie się z treściami dotyczącymi mang i anime niejako "zastępuje" mi samo ich czytanie czy oglądanie.

Kocham swoją rodzinę - jej członkowie są jedynymi osobami, którzy bezwarunkowo mnie akceptują. Kocham z nimi spędzać czas - w jakikolwiek sposób. Niestety, moja mama zachorowała na raka i niedawno zmarła. Wszyscy członkowie mojej rodziny wciąż są tym psychicznie zdewastowani.

Kocham moje koty, które są dla mnie najważniejsze na świecie.

***

Szukam osoby, która znajduje się w zbliżonym położeniu, co ja.

Wierzę, że doświadczając podobnego cierpienia, mając analogiczne problemy (takie jak depresja, nienawiść własna, zerowa samoakceptacja czy brak przyjaciół) łatwiej nam będzie nawzajem siebie zrozumieć, zaakceptować i wzajemnie się o siebie troszczyć.

***

Przepraszam, ale jestem otwarty tylko na relacje z kobietami. W czasach, w których udawało mi się jeszcze utrzymywać jakąkolwiek namiastkę koleżeńskich stosunków, były to relacje wyłącznie z dziewczynami. Tylko one wykazywały się wobec mnie akceptacją.

Nigdy nie byłem i nie jestem zainteresowany relacjami z mężczyznami.
 
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breezyjelly

breezyjelly

Member
Jun 7, 2024
12
Hi

33/F from South Africa.

Happy to chat to anyone who needs to (just don't be creepy).

Can't PM yet, but hopefully soon. I really need a friend. I can't really talk to any of my IRL friends (haven't chatted to them in weeks). I'll probably ctb soon, would just like not to feel so completely lonely even just for a few days.
 
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emptyenvelopes

emptyenvelopes

Student
Jun 15, 2024
103
Hi I am in my late twenties, female from the United States. I am looking for a friend I can talk about both the roses and thorns of life with. My friends irl all are happy and have their lives together. I feel stuck and sad and am scared for the future. And I just want to 1) talk it out to take the power away from those sad/scary thoughts and 2) listen to others in a similar situation to know o am not alone. Feel free to DM me on here
 
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R

reversebandaid

Member
May 1, 2024
29
Hi
I'm 24f. Age and gender don't matter.

Looking for someone to talk to while I wait to find someone to ctb with.

I like dogs, art (although I rarely do any anymore) and puzzles. If you don't have the same interests that's fine, tell me about yours :) Really just want company
 
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BackToLobby

BackToLobby

My bad, first time living.
Apr 9, 2024
80
24M from Hispanic. I'm looking for somebody around my age to talk about our problems, ctb, ADHD... Any topic it's ok but preferably in spanish. I describe myself as a very empathic person that has been through different difficulties and doesn't know what to do with his life anymore.
 
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remluvr

remluvr

Trying to Find Forever peace.
Jun 17, 2024
65
Hello :D
I'm 20m Ftm I live in Canada
I have very bad social anxiety so it is basically impossible for me to make friends irl sadly
I'm always open to speaking to literally anyone as I'm very lonely <3
I love anime, video games such as Valorant and overwatch, skateboarding and drawing !
 
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B

b_adr

Member
Mar 29, 2024
38
35 F from Eastern/Northern Europe, would be open to chat with someone in my age range, gender and location. Especially, since I believe there are not a lot of F in my age range that are actively thinking/planning about CTB. I myself am planning to CTB in a time range of about 6 months to 2 years.
Also, I am not into gaming and anime. However, I do appreciate good movies and music.
 
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AngelTears

AngelTears

Last Days
Jun 10, 2023
63
Name/Nickname:
Angel, Angel Tears, Molly, HT, Tears, Hero

Age: 25

Likes: Making and listening to music, anime, RP, talking, cooking..

Dislikes: Fake and dishonest people, ghosting, abandonment, the sunlight

Bio: I have struggled with physical and mental health my entire life... Currently I find myself looking for friends I can hopefully call family ❤️

Gender: Genderfluid
Pronouns: they/them, she/her, he/him

Timezone: AST (UTC-4)

Language(s): English, Spanish

Looking for new friends. Mostly to talk and maybe watch movies/series, listen to music.
 
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doingitrighthistime

doingitrighthistime

on my way out
May 15, 2024
44
24F and probably going to CTB in August. Located in Southern USA and would like to make friends with someone who gets it and maybe potentially also find someone to be there with me through it. I have a child and am working through the feelings associated with leaving him.

I'm interested in sciences like biology and physics, philosophy, and generally thought-provoking conversations.

Really just need a friend.
 
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L

lacrimosa

Experienced
Jul 1, 2024
233
Male, late 30s.

I like music production and discussion, philosophy (Dostoyevsky and Nietzsche especially), binge watching movies and TV, pets, creative writing, staying inside (agoraphobic), and philanthropy.

If I could find a fellow musician (male or female) to collaborate with, that would be cool. Or someone to read my writing and provide feedback, that would be cool too. I could also critique your writing. Or just someone to talk to about philosophy or other ideas. Also, finding someone whom wants to write a story together, that would be fun.

Communication would be anonymous of course as I don't want anyone to know my real name as I am strict about anonymity.

Feel free to DM me.
 
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like-spoiledmilk

like-spoiledmilk

Member
Jul 10, 2023
35
Hello!

About me: I'm 25F, I use she/her pronouns. I do not have a set date to ctb. I am nice, though. Talk to me about anything!

I'm interested in: yoga, building little model houses, reading (currently the Ender's Game series), going to the library, harassing my cat, playing video games, and painting my nails. I'm currently trying to learn bass guitar. My favorite show is ATLA and my favorite movie is Spirited Away. If you start a farm with me in Stardew Valley I'll be your best friend forever.

Feel free to PM if you're interested! Thank you for reading!
 
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J

Jabr0ni

New Member
Jun 27, 2024
4
Hey all, 28M from Poland here.

Functioning autistic with depression and anxiety (of course there is more, don't you worry about that).

I feel like I'm locked in a weird prison cell, where only death of my parents will let me finally ctb. I'm unable to take calm retirement from them, so I pretend to be an adult who has his life together.

It's hard to find new friends due to me isolating myself as much as I can. And even if I meet someone, I can't really connect with them, having messed up mental health.

I feel like a good listener and I tend to give good advices (mostly about work, career) if someone needs it. In general I like to paint with acrylics, grow plants and - right now I'm thinking hard what else I like, what a depressing realisation - smoke weed. After testing like 9 different antidepressants througout last decade, nothing helps me escape like weed does.

Age and gender does not matter, I'd simply love to connect with someone who, unfortunately, struggles like I do.

Anyway! Have a calm evening/day and get better y'all.
 
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Alpenglow

Alpenglow

Never really there
Mar 5, 2024
48
Hi! I'm Ember, 19M from France.

I'm currently in university studying CS. I'm interests in video games, singing, maybe a bit of psychology and physics but it's been a while since I've read up on them and my memory is… subpar. I have a burgeoning interest in literature and I do cook somewhat regularly.

If you need someone to talk to I'm happy to listen and help. Thanks for reading, I hope you have a good day (even if I don't think that's in the cards for most of us).
 
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N

Not a Cylon

Blah
Jun 27, 2024
51
Early 40s male here living in south eastern New England. Currently playing FF7: Rebirth and watching The Boys & Fallout. Looking to chat with people around the same age who live in the same region. If you prefer real maple syrup over the fake stuff, we'll be good friends. (How bout them Red Sox?).
 
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-nobodyknows-

-nobodyknows-

Mage
Jun 16, 2024
504
24 M USA

I'd like to have someone who's okay with supporting me a little bit. If you are planning to ctb though and don't want any support please do not reach out to me. I can't deal with getting close to someone and then losing them.

While I've been trying to recover, I can't say for certain that that's the path I'll go down. I want to, I really do, but I just don't know if it's in the cards for me. I'd like to have someone who's okay with setting up specific times to chat on here. I can be quite melancholy when I'm having a problem so please don't feel too bad if I don't respond to your support in a positive way right away. Most likely I will come back later and thank you though. I do my best to be supportive of others, but I can be rather awkward.

I have depression and anxiety. I have been in treatment for nine years at this point and have done everything from therapy and medication to hospitalizations and ECT. At this point I've managed to get off medication and am trying to do normal things again, but being around other people is making things worse.

I enjoy anime, with some of my favorites including Angel Beats, Oregairu, Shinsekai Yori (the book is also really good), A Silent Voice, and the Heaven's Feel movies.

Feel free to look over my posts to learn a bit more about me. If you think we'd be a good match please reach out to me and tell me a little bit about yourself. I'm not really comfortable with a lot of people though so please don't feel too bad if I don't reply to you.
 
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darkandtwisty

darkandtwisty

Member
Jul 10, 2024
40
Hey everyone. My name is Marie I'm 33 F. I am a single mom of a pretty awesome kid.
I am on the fence of CTB, I want the pain of it all to stop. I've tried three times in the past (10 months ago was my last). I pretend pretty well that I'm fine and happy. So well I even convince myself.
My biggest issue has always been I care far more for others than I do myself. Being empathetic has brought a lot of toxic and dangerous influences into my life that caused damage to my soul.
But, on a brighter side: I am an adamant car karaoke singer. I love reading and my favorite shows are Supernatural and Vampire Diaries. Last one is a little hokey but it's a guilty pleasure 😊.
 
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sadlyexisting

sadlyexisting

Missing the good times
Jun 26, 2023
102
Hi!! I am 20F from Germany.

I have been suicidal since the age of 11/12. Currently I am studying medicine (first year) and if I stay alive long enough, I'd like to work in forensics some day.

I don't really have hobbies at the moment, and I just spend my time watching YouTube or any kind of series. I also play video games sometimes, but not regularly anymore. I am very interested in horror and paranormal things too, and watch horror movies from time to time.

I can not get any mental health diagnosis at the moment, so I can't really tell what or even if I have any mental illness. But my symptoms do match with BPD, depression and anxiety, which I want to get tested as soon as I am able too.

Otherwise I'd say I am a pretty good listener, even though I have problems communicating my emotions, I try my best to be there for everyone and comfort them.

Preferably please be under 35, gender doesn't matter, so just sent me a message. I respond to basically everyone!
 
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Nefera

Nefera

Member
Jun 30, 2024
55
23F/Brazil - I can speak Portuguese, English, Spanish and French (although poorly)

I would preferably like to talk with someone my age or older but location doesn't really matter to me.

I have a few hobbies and interests but I'm currently paralyzed with depression to really pursue them but I'll gladly listen to you talk about your interests as well.

I'm mostly into art (drawing, painting, sculptures, cinema, performance, fashion...), martial arts, history, sociology and biology. I have a black cat named Mushu which I love very much ❤️🐈

If you'd like to connect DM me and we'll get to chatting :)
 
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R

rebelnow111

Member
Jul 12, 2024
50
HI.im todd . im autistic with alot of depression and anxiety. im very caring but dont make many friends because im a social outcast, disabled and have alot of social anxiety. im an activist and spend alot of my time online. some o0f my other hobbies include pokemon i often play pokemon go when im walking outside.i have alot of problems caused by an abusive family. message me if you want to chat. age and gender dont matter.
 
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riumasdf1

riumasdf1

Member
Jun 26, 2024
7
Hi, I'm Riuma, Chilean, 18... eh, I don't really know what I am.
I like to draw, I am currently in the creepypasta fandom, I like music, I listen to a lot of folk and I am also a fan of Conan Gray.
I don't understand correctly what I feel, I find it difficult to express myself and communicate.
I like anime (FMA, banana fish, totsukuni no shoujo, chizu or Ghibli movies) and my favorite mangaka is Nagabe. And for games I like Minecraft, Genshin, Yttd, Pokemon, although lately I don't really play anything.
I'm open to PM although I'm not very talkative :)
 
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scribblekitty

scribblekitty

New Member
Jul 1, 2023
2
20f from the midwest (america). ive really been struggling lately tbh… im hoping maybe having someone to talk to regularly could make my days a little bit better ^^ i enjoy things such as dark documentaries, collecting dolls/toys/plushies, and the colors green and pink. i am not currently in recovery so if you are i dont think it would be best for us to talk ONLY because i dont want to bring anyone else down with me- just being 100% honest. i wish i had more to add but idk im just not that cool. if you wanna try being friends still though please dont be afraid to dm me, id love to meet some new people <3
 
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M

mediocre

trapped here
Nov 9, 2019
1,442
31M from Ireland.. I have Aspergers (mild autistic). Having a friend to talk to everyday would be great because I am on my own daily and feel really isolated and alone:(
I would really like to meet other autistic people because I don't know any and it would be good to talk to people who know what it's like.
But if you are not autistic is completely fine ..
Talking to people really helps me and I hope I could be helpful to others.
Please dm me if you would like to be friends or just need someone to talk to!
 
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R

reddalert

Member
Jun 8, 2024
15
31 F from Southern California. I have felt lonely all my life and would like to not feel lonely my last few months. I'm looking for a friend to talk to and connect to, ideally someone I can get close with. Either male or female is fine. Just be non-judgmental and responsive and open, and in return I can be the same. Let's support each other.
 
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Pathetic and Sad

Pathetic and Sad

Just going through life's motions
May 21, 2024
151
19M looking for a friend to work on recovery with. Preferably someone at or below 25, we can still talk if you are older be we probably can't relate much. We can play minecraft together maybe? You can just dm me if interested (:
 
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AmberianDawn

AmberianDawn

Member
Jun 9, 2024
62
30 years old, woman. I speak spanish and english. Preferably people of my age or older, to chat about philosophy, science, ctb methods, play any online game like among us, league of legend or any other game to distract ourselves a little from suicidal thoughts; chat, laugh or cry about how shitty life is. I still don't have a date for CTB

XoXo
 
-nobodyknows-

-nobodyknows-

Mage
Jun 16, 2024
504
20f from the midwest (america). ive really been struggling lately tbh… im hoping maybe having someone to talk to regularly could make my days a little bit better ^^ i enjoy things such as dark documentaries, collecting dolls/toys/plushies, and the colors green and pink. i am not currently in recovery so if you are i dont think it would be best for us to talk ONLY because i dont want to bring anyone else down with me- just being 100% honest. i wish i had more to add but idk im just not that cool. if you wanna try being friends still though please dont be afraid to dm me, id love to meet some new people <3
Not sure if you're aware, but your DMs appear closed…
 
Lunarian

Lunarian

Member
Jul 17, 2024
6
Hi, I'm 25 (gender is whatever) neet looking for friends. Can talk about depressing stuff or stuff we're into or just like fun conversations. I'm kinda dumb so not really good at talking about complicated subjects so if you want like big brain subject talk I'm not so good at that. I'm into good stories; anime (Girls Band Cry<3), games (really into FFXIV rn), trying to become a film person, music (hip hop, midwest emo) etc. Trying to learn how to draw but I'm really bad so I get frustrated. Feel free to message me if you want to chat and be friends.
 
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daocreator

daocreator

Unstable uni student
Nov 29, 2023
62
Hi

19/M

I generally like listening to music. Been listening to more of dungeon synth lately, and a bit of jazz. I like reading novels, generally fantasy ones. And that's about it for my likes

Honestly not sure about life lately. I took this year to figure out my resolution with my studies & ctb reasons but I'm still confused. And it never really gets any better, so as I always thought when I was younger it's better to ctb earlier rather than to regret it more as I grow up. But the hesitation is always there: I'm still young and I have yet to see the world.

Though, honestly, it's all weird as I'm not someone who's got interests (aside those mentioned). Like goals, or something to look forward to.

Ah, and romance was not a thing for me either. I mean it's probably because I never tried seriously, but also because if I ever decide to ctb I'm not selfish enough to give more people(friends, family, now a potential lover?) more trauma.

As u can see, I'm a bag of unsolved problems. I really do hope someone got a similar mentality of mine to discuss life, and mainly fix many of my points of view. As I give most of my friends advice but never am on the receiving end...
 
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I

imissmycat

Member
Jul 19, 2024
35
Hello.

29/M/Europe

Found this site today. I used to put myself close to death at a daily basis until a few years ago, but things got better. Worked on my career, was successful. Made my first real life friend and later girlfriend. All those things went to shit this year. Now I'm back to comforting myself with the thought of death being close.

I have savings, an apartment, good health. I just can't put my clothes on or pack my bag or change anything.

I have no one to talk to right now, at all. Would be nice to make a friend. Usually I can only talk to people who "understand."
 
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onelastcall

onelastcall

discord: andillseeyouwhenyougethere
Jul 11, 2024
77
Hi, would like someone to talk about anything really. I can't PM. Discord onelastcall_
 
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