Vivacious_Vee
Member
- Jun 17, 2023
- 70
Afternoon all.
After reading so much on this site, I just want to CTB, but am getting stuck in all the reading. SOOO am thinking do I have items in the kitchen to use? Or do I need to go to the shops, can I get what I need in the shop? What do I need?
I have borax (half cup), sodium thiophosphate (several tea spoons), other salts.... Just need to make sure I take enough of what ever it is to never get off the bus. Any items in shops to add on to these? Or is there another way.... Feeling overwhelmed here, have thought of so many things, at one point didn't want the health care system to have any chance of touching my body again. That was why I was going to go for a swim after taking sleeping pills. Then I thought of sleeping pills then fireworks around me and setting them off, but knowing my luck would end up with burns and such.
Just need this to be a one off. My best to date was to jump off the car park at the hospital where they done what they did to me, hang myself but before I fall forward, get the vein in the neck, with razor blade, then the hospital would have to close at least for a day and news would be all over it.... BUT I dont want to upset others, if that makes sense.
If I knew how to hang myself, I would do that, but how? I just know it has to be today. Looked up vein in neck, but the blood would drive the hounds crazed and that is just mean. Has to be here at home, so the hounds are safe. They need to be safe, then I can leave them.... If you know of a link, please share.... Thank you xx Looking to catch the bus and just relax and have a peaceful exit after such a traumatic existence.
After reading so much on this site, I just want to CTB, but am getting stuck in all the reading. SOOO am thinking do I have items in the kitchen to use? Or do I need to go to the shops, can I get what I need in the shop? What do I need?
I have borax (half cup), sodium thiophosphate (several tea spoons), other salts.... Just need to make sure I take enough of what ever it is to never get off the bus. Any items in shops to add on to these? Or is there another way.... Feeling overwhelmed here, have thought of so many things, at one point didn't want the health care system to have any chance of touching my body again. That was why I was going to go for a swim after taking sleeping pills. Then I thought of sleeping pills then fireworks around me and setting them off, but knowing my luck would end up with burns and such.
Just need this to be a one off. My best to date was to jump off the car park at the hospital where they done what they did to me, hang myself but before I fall forward, get the vein in the neck, with razor blade, then the hospital would have to close at least for a day and news would be all over it.... BUT I dont want to upset others, if that makes sense.
If I knew how to hang myself, I would do that, but how? I just know it has to be today. Looked up vein in neck, but the blood would drive the hounds crazed and that is just mean. Has to be here at home, so the hounds are safe. They need to be safe, then I can leave them.... If you know of a link, please share.... Thank you xx Looking to catch the bus and just relax and have a peaceful exit after such a traumatic existence.
