Jumping into the river

[Lucilius]

I really have no other options. Of all possible methods this seems the only one that's accessible. Just tie some weight to my body and jump from a bridge at 4am, when nobody is around. I could also just swim in from ashore. I have been scouting bridges and although the "popular" ones in this city are under heavy surveillance, that does not seem to apply to others. One question is how to actually secure the weight onto my body in a way that I won't be able to get rid of it once my SI kicks in.
I don't care if this is physically painful. It seems to me that one is barely conscious in such high adrenaline situations and if anything, physical pain might work as a welcome distraction from mental pain in those last few moments. No grief, no regrets, no shame. My body has only made me suffer during all these years. Why should I care if it suffers?

So many people telling the people in this forum "kill yourselves already, hypocrites". Shit or get off the pot. And honestly, they are right. It is about time. This is my contribution to a better world. A world without scum like me. The best thing I will have ever done for humanity.

 

[Someone123]

I really have no other options. Of all possible methods this seems the only one that's accessible. Just tie some weight to my body and jump from a bridge at 4am, when nobody is around. I could also just swim in from ashore. I have been scouting bridges and although the "popular" ones in this city are under heavy surveillance, that does not seem to apply to others. One question is how to actually secure the weight onto my body in a way that I won't be able to get rid of it once my SI kicks in.
I don't care if this is physically painful. It seems to me that one is barely conscious in such high adrenaline situations and if anything, physical pain might work as a welcome distraction from mental pain in those last few moments. No grief, no regrets, no shame. My body has only made me suffer during all these years. Why should I care if it suffers?

So many people telling the people in this forum "kill yourselves already, hypocrites". Shit or get off the pot. And honestly, they are right. It is about time. This is my contribution to a better world. A world without scum like me. The best thing I will have ever done for humanity.

I hope you can find peace somehow, but I am sad to hear you beat yourself up.

 

[Octavia]

I am certain that there are worse people than you in the world. Yours truly, for example.

 

[Someone123]

I do think tht most people who are depressed have been hurt more by others than they have hurt others, though it must be case by case.

 

[AngryDog]

I really have no other options. Of all possible methods this seems the only one that's accessible. Just tie some weight to my body and jump from a bridge at 4am, when nobody is around. I could also just swim in from ashore. I have been scouting bridges and although the "popular" ones in this city are under heavy surveillance, that does not seem to apply to others. One question is how to actually secure the weight onto my body in a way that I won't be able to get rid of it once my SI kicks in.
I don't care if this is physically painful. It seems to me that one is barely conscious in such high adrenaline situations and if anything, physical pain might work as a welcome distraction from mental pain in those last few moments. No grief, no regrets, no shame. My body has only made me suffer during all these years. Why should I care if it suffers?

So many people telling the people in this forum "kill yourselves already, hypocrites". Shit or get off the pot. And honestly, they are right. It is about time. This is my contribution to a better world. A world without scum like me. The best thing I will have ever done for humanity.

I don't know you, but I don't think the world would be better with another death by suicide. Your suffering must be unbearable and I'm so sorry you're going through such a shitty time. If there's part of you that has second thoughts, feel free to pm me.

 

[FuneralCry]

That method sounds unbearable and like it would be difficult to succeed with, but I do understand having limited options in ways to die. I wish you the best and I hope that you find the freedom that you are searching for.

 

[Lucilius]

You need not think that none but great men have had the strength to burst the bonds of human servitude; you need not believe that this cannot be done except by a Cato, – Cato, who with his hand dragged forth the spirit which he had not succeeded in freeing by the sword. Nay, men of the meanest lot in life have by a mighty impulse escaped to safety, and when they were not allowed to die at their own convenience, or to suit themselves in their choice of the instruments of death, they have snatched up whatever was lying ready to hand, and by sheer strength have turned objects which were by nature harmless into weapons of their own. For example, there was lately in a training-school for wild-beast gladiators a German, who was making ready for the morning exhibition; he withdrew in order to relieve himself, – the only thing which he was allowed to do in secret and without the presence of a guard. While so engaged, he seized the stick of wood, tipped with a sponge, which was devoted to the vilest uses, and stuffed it, just as it was, down his throat; thus he blocked up his windpipe, and choked the breath from his body. That was truly to insult death! . Yes, indeed; it was not a very elegant or becoming way to die; but what is more foolish than to be over-nice about dying? What a brave fellow! He surely deserved to be allowed to choose his fate! How bravely he would have wielded a sword! With what courage he would have hurled himself into the depths of the sea, or down a precipice! Cut off from resources on every hand, he yet found a way to furnish himself with death, and with a weapon for death. Hence you can understand that nothing but the will need postpone death. Let each man judge the deed of this most zealous fellow as he likes, provided we agree on this point, – that the foulest death is preferable to the fairest slavery.