True, my friend. Some people. Some lives. Some souls. Some minds. Some bodies. Some of us. Not all. But some. Hand picked to suffer. To suffer for life. To suffer so much that you crave for death more than anything else. We are just fading away to death. The day I die will be my happiest day on earth.
I feel like a lot of this is a facade and people aren't necessarily 'living their best lives'. I think social media is a massive issue with regards to this.
If you check my Facebook page for instance, in the last month, there is a post from me getting a great new job with about 45 likes/comments on it. There are posts from me visiting a friend abroad, photos of me on a tropical beach, pictures of me and friends drinking glasses of bubbly. Photos from friends birthday parties. A photo of a nice meal. A photo where I have nice make up or clothes on.
Although these events really did happen and were lovely, my Facebook friends don't know that on Sunday I was laying in bed breaking down in tears every hour. My Facebook friends don't know I had to get signed off from my previous job with anxiety and depression for two weeks. My Facebook friends see the glam night out, but not the torturous comedown the next day where I genuinely cannot bring myself to go upstairs for a glass of water because I cannot bare to bump into any house mates or deal with social interaction. My Facebook friends don't see me worrying about my weight after that nice meal. My Facebook friends didn't see the absolute state of my overdrawn bank balance after that little trip abroad. My Facebook friends didn't see me worrying about how I was going to make my rent because I blew too much money on sh*tty cocaine or other unwholesome things to try and numb my brain, and asking my Dad to please lend me money. My Facebook friends don't see the rejection emails or ignored applications from the 6 interviews I have attended in the last month. My Facebook friends don't see me visiting this forum.
Things are not always as they seem.. I think sometimes when we are low, we can automatically think everyone has it easier than us but if you look a little bit deeper.. There was that Chinese proverb that said something like; we have three faces, one that we show the world, one that we show our family and friends and one only we know..
This is just another perspective though. Of course I know the feeling of jealousy, to look at happy couples snuggling up in bus stops in seemingly perfect relationships when I feel so lonely. To see someone of my age afford to travel round the world, when I am stuck in an office being prodded and poked by the powers-that-be on £15,000+ a year more than me that I am not good enough. To watch a beautiful woman not need any make up and to look stunning (although beauty is in the eye of the beholder, right?). To watch someone consume 1000 calories in one sitting and not have an ounce of fat on them. To see people that have been born into privileged back grounds that have had everything handed to them on a plate. But above is just another side of the coin...
I feel for you.I feel like a lot of this is a facade and people aren't necessarily 'living their best lives'. I think social media is a massive issue with regards to this.
If you check my Facebook page for instance, in the last month, there is a post from me getting a great new job with about 45 likes/comments on it. There are posts from me visiting a friend abroad, photos of me on a tropical beach, pictures of me and friends drinking glasses of bubbly. Photos from friends birthday parties. A photo of a nice meal. A photo where I have nice make up or clothes on.
Although these events really did happen and were lovely, my Facebook friends don't know that on Sunday I was laying in bed breaking down in tears every hour. My Facebook friends don't know I had to get signed off from my previous job with anxiety and depression for two weeks. My Facebook friends see the glam night out, but not the torturous comedown the next day where I genuinely cannot bring myself to go upstairs for a glass of water because I cannot bare to bump into any house mates or deal with social interaction. My Facebook friends don't see me worrying about my weight after that nice meal. My Facebook friends didn't see the absolute state of my overdrawn bank balance after that little trip abroad. My Facebook friends didn't see me worrying about how I was going to make my rent because I blew too much money on sh*tty cocaine or other unwholesome things to try and numb my brain, and asking my Dad to please lend me money. My Facebook friends don't see the rejection emails or ignored applications from the 6 interviews I have attended in the last month. My Facebook friends don't see me visiting this forum.
Things are not always as they seem.. I think sometimes when we are low, we can automatically think everyone has it easier than us but if you look a little bit deeper.. There was that Chinese proverb that said something like; we have three faces, one that we show the world, one that we show our family and friends and one only we know..
This is just another perspective though. Of course I know the feeling of jealousy, to look at happy couples snuggling up in bus stops in seemingly perfect relationships when I feel so lonely. To see someone of my age afford to travel round the world, when I am stuck in an office being prodded and poked by the powers-that-be on £15,000+ a year more than me that I am not good enough. To watch a beautiful woman not need any make up and to look stunning (although beauty is in the eye of the beholder, right?). To watch someone consume 1000 calories in one sitting and not have an ounce of fat on them. To see people that have been born into privileged back grounds that have had everything handed to them on a plate. But above is just another side of the coin...
I have a loving family they've suffered a lot because of me emotionally and financially but um mentally ill since I was 12. So whats the point?
Unlucky BabyRage
Ever since I was a child, I used to say the same thing, "life's a bitch then you die"
Yeah eventually the pain and misery in my world becomes too much to bear and then I try to come out of it and then realize that my shits too fucked up and I get jealous and go back to my own miserable world. It's a vicious cycle I can never come out of unless I get killed accidentally or I CTB.
I feel like majority of people are suffering and put on a front but they have the illusion that lift is a gift and they should make the most of it, we seem like we are failing because we have given up on life and that's what makes us different. We aren't pretending.
