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spectraltease

spectraltease

When everything is lost everything is found
Sep 23, 2022
317
I got really everything I ever wanted. I don't want to go too much in detail but I got just everything and thought my whole live if I would have this, I would be fulfilled and happy but im not.
I hate myself so much for not being able to feel any happiness or expressing feelings.
I fucking hate my self and myself, I want to fight this depression everyday but I just dont get happy.
Sometimes I think about it and smile for 2 sec or I feel good that I have "everything" I ever dreamed of, but in the next seconds I just feel empty like the rest of my life. Got birthday today, was feeling so damn depressed. Sleeped some time and go now to the gym. Nobody in my family just asked me to do something, just some shitty instagram messages. This day just remembers my birth, I hate this day
 
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D

deletednumber

Enlightened
Apr 29, 2021
1,603
Hey...i feel you so much because my birthday's day is definitely one of the day i suffer more.
I'm so sorry but i just wanted to tell you that you are not alone,that you are worthy and beautiful๐Ÿค—โค
Happy Birthday to you๐ŸŽ‚
I send you a lot of love and hugs๐Ÿค—โค๐Ÿค—๐Ÿค—๐Ÿค—
 
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Huntfish34

Huntfish34

Enlightened
Mar 13, 2020
1,619
Happy Birthday, I'm sorry that it's not going well but I can certainly relate with the depression, anxiety and self hatred. Hope your day gets better, if even just a little. You deserve it ๐ŸŽ‚
 
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DreamSurfer

DreamSurfer

Beyond this reality the waves of peace await
Apr 8, 2022
110
First off, I can totally relate. I chased money, success, and materials for so long. I thought it was the easy answer to the end of my mental health issues. Instead, the more I advanced in my career and more money I made, the worse I felt because I kept thinking, maybe I just need a little more and it will help. And that never came, all that came was a reality check.

More importantly, through the mental pain and anguish that you feel, I still hope that you somehow can find a single reason to feel good on your birthday. Life really fucking sucks, but we still deserve to feel good from time to time. Happy Birthday!
 
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N

nopointinlife

Student
Mar 11, 2022
111
I hate my birthday too. It only represents another passing of a painful year of life and the coming of another year of darkness, pain, and suffering.
 
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locked*n*loaded

locked*n*loaded

Archangel
Apr 15, 2022
9,351
For what it's worth, Happy Birthday to you. I hate my birthdays, too.
 
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๐Ÿ‘

๐Ÿ‘๏ธ๐Ÿ‘ƒ๐Ÿ‘๏ธ

Enlightened
Aug 14, 2022
1,290
Happy birthday ๐Ÿค—
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
46,714
I personally dislike what birthdays represent which is being the day in which all of the suffering started and of course I hate the thought of ageing. I want no more days or years, whenever I have a birthday it reminds me of how I have managed to stay here for another unnecessary, awful year when I should had already left this world. But I get that it can be so dreadful feeling trapped in a life that you hate, it really is such a cruel existence which causes all this torment to be experienced.
 
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spacehardware

spacehardware

Unsubscribing soon
Feb 21, 2022
102
I also hate my birthday. I cannot fight off the misery it brings me.

Someone once sent the following birthday wish to me, and it tickled me, so I am sending it to you.

Happy* Birthday!
*delete as applicable
 
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S

Skal

Member
Sep 22, 2022
41
Same here. My birthday is still a few months away but the closer it gets the more depressed I become. It makes me realize I'm no longer young and it's too late for me to change anything. I also don't want to see my parents get older and older, and frailer and frailer. My old sister has recently married and is now expecting a baby, and I'm just a looser hiding in my mom's basement. With each passing year, people around me steadily move their lives forward but I feel like I stand still becoming rotten inside out. Anyway, I wish you all the best.
 
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