Story It's a month today since I OD'd.

[Timetodie90]

A month ago I had a choice while my mother was night shift. I could have ctb by full suspension or partial suspension. I had everything set up. I had some Brandy I don't drink alcohol so it effected me strongly. Also two types of sleeping tablets Valerian or Promethazine. So I could have took the sleeping pills and drank alcohol and ctb by hanging I had it set up where I just had to slide the steps away. Hands cuffed behind my back. Just needed a little push. But no.... I decided to attempt an OD instead with Promethazine, Amitriptyline and Codeine. Washed down with the Brandy. Everything worked I went to bed. However I was found 12 hours later. Blue lips, snoring loudly, unconscious. Spent about 4 days in hospital out of it hallucinating. No damage done that I know of. However I wish I tried hanging first. I might have ctb. Now I'm on new medication and being watched. I still have my rope hidden. But oh how I wish I tried hanging first. The OD just seemed easier.

 

[theguineapigking]

A month ago I had a choice while my mother was night shift. I could have ctb by full suspension or partial suspension. I had everything set up. I had some Brandy I don't drink alcohol so it effected me strongly. Also two types of sleeping tablets Valerian or Promethazine. So I could have took the sleeping pills and drank alcohol and ctb by hanging I had it set up where I just had to slide the steps away. Hands cuffed behind my back. Just needed a little push. But no.... I decided to attempt an OD instead with Promethazine, Amitriptyline and Codeine. Washed down with the Brandy. Everything worked I went to bed. However I was found 12 hours later. Blue lips, snoring loudly, unconscious. Spent about 4 days in hospital out of it hallucinating. No damage done that I know of. However I wish I tried hanging first. I might have ctb. Now I'm on new medication and being watched. I still have my rope hidden. But oh how I wish I tried hanging first. The OD just seemed easier.

I'm very sorry that you went through that experience. I would hate to be in the hospital and get all the awkward crap from my family. I'm glad you don't appear to have permanent damage. Liver damage is common with overdosing.


Hanging can be more reliable, yes. But full suspension is often painful(although, not for long if done right) Overdosing can be pretty painless. Partial can be pretty painless too, however, it's not as reliable as full.


Again, I'm really sorry to hear of your suffering. Do you have any doubts now that you were given a second chance? You said you wish you'd have tried hanging, so I assume not. Just please think long and hard before attempting again. Be careful with hanging and brain damage if you're found early(I know you said your mom worked the night shift).



If you need to talk at all, I'm here for you. No judgement. I'll just listen.



Best wishes man.

 

[Timetodie90]

I'm very sorry that you went through that experience. I would hate to be in the hospital and get all the awkward crap from my family. I'm glad you don't appear to have permanent damage. Liver damage is common with overdosing.


Hanging can be more reliable, yes. But full suspension is often painful(although, not for long if done right) Overdosing can be pretty painless. Partial can be pretty painless too, however, it's not as reliable as full.


Again, I'm really sorry to hear of your suffering. Do you have any doubts now that you were given a second chance? You said you wish you'd have tried hanging, so I assume not. Just please think long and hard before attempting again. Be careful with hanging and brain damage if you're found early(I know you said your mom worked the night shift).



If you need to talk at all, I'm here for you. No judgement. I'll just listen.



Best wishes man.

My mam couldn't come into the hospital due to COVID 19. But she was very understanding about it all. I may have liver damage as they kept on saying to my mam do I abuse alcohol. Also I have to go for a heart scan in a few months. So may be some damage I'm not really sure.

I attempted full a couple of months back but foolishly I didn't cuff my hands. So pulled myself back up by grabbing the beam. It did hurt and my throat hurt afterwards for about a week it wasn't agony just a bit sore. I have tried partial and the tourniquet method. I managed to get a high from the tourniquet method. However I have never really went far with partial. But due to me not being an alcohol drinker or being a regular sleeping pill taker and being on strong medication that makes you drowsy with alcohol. I probably would be best doing it after a good drink and some sleeping pills. The method of partial I would use is attached below. I have had a few trial runs with it but never went far. Yes overdosing is pretty painless well mine was.

I have no doubts about what I done now I've been given a secound chance as it were. As I'm getting better help now. New medication etc. I will think long and hard especially about my method. I know you need to be careful with hanging and getting brain damage. My mam only works night shifts now and again. I actually have my own place where I could do partial. I'm just at my mam's due to having a mental breakdown in January and because of the COVID 19 lockdown. At the moment I'm staying at hers aswell due to my recent attempt and because if I went back to mine she would be suspicious and stuff. That I was going back to ctb. So I'm just playing the I'm getting better game at the moment. So when I get back to my own place I can start to plan my suicide better and more thoroughly. Plus I can order and buy stuff easier. But there's no point going back to mine anyway as due to the lockdown stuff is harder to get but not impossible. How ever if I find out I can get the Clarifix procedure done on my nose I will change my mind about ctbing. Or if the new nasal spray I'm going to ask my doc for works I will change my mind too. It's having Chronic Rhino-Sinusitis that is making me suicidal.

I really appreciate you offering to talk. This site is full of wonderful caring people.

Thank you for your kind reply my friend. Love and Peace.

 

[theguineapigking]

My mam couldn't come into the hospital due to COVID 19. But she was very understanding about it all. I may have liver damage as they kept on saying to my mam do I abuse alcohol. Also I have to go for a heart scan in a few months. So may be some damage I'm not really sure.

I attempted full a couple of months back but foolishly I didn't cuff my hands. So pulled myself back up by grabbing the beam. It did hurt and my throat hurt afterwards for about a week it wasn't agony just a bit sore. I have tried partial and the tourniquet method. I managed to get a high from the tourniquet method. However I have never really went far with partial. But due to me not being an alcohol drinker or being a regular sleeping pill taker and being on strong medication that makes you drowsy with alcohol. I probably would be best doing it after a good drink and some sleeping pills. The method of partial I would use is attached below. I have had a few trial runs with it but never went far. Yes overdosing is pretty painless well mine was.

I have no doubts about what I done now I've been given a secound chance as it were. As I'm getting better help now. New medication etc. I will think long and hard especially about my method. I know you need to be careful with hanging and getting brain damage. My mam only works night shifts now and again. I actually have my own place where I could do partial. I'm just at my mam's due to having a mental breakdown in January and because of the COVID 19 lockdown. At the moment I'm staying at hers aswell due to my recent attempt and because if I went back to mine she would be suspicious and stuff. That I was going back to ctb. So I'm just playing the I'm getting better game at the moment. So when I get back to my own place I can start to plan my suicide better and more thoroughly. Plus I can order and buy stuff easier. But there's no point going back to mine anyway as due to the lockdown stuff is harder to get but not impossible. How ever if I find out I can get the Clarifix procedure done on my nose I will change my mind about ctbing. Or if the new nasal spray I'm going to ask my doc for works I will change my mind too. It's having Chronic Rhino-Sinusitis that is making me suicidal.

I really appreciate you offering to talk. This site is full of wonderful caring people.

Thank you for your kind reply my friend. Love and Peace.

Hey. I'm so sorry to hear that. This world is so cruel to some of the nicest people. :(



I'm sorry to hear about your full experience. It sounds pretty painful. Ideally if you do it right, you'd only experience pain(be conscious) for ~ 15 seconds or less..hopefully 7. Because you didn't go through with it, now you have to deal with the pain from your neck. I know that sucks man. Not to be selfish, but it's kind of nice you're alive still, because I can talk with you :)


The push-up position may well work. I personally settled on partial standing. Essentially, i plan to put around half of my weight onto the rope standing straight. This is kind of in between the typical partial position and full suspension pressure. This should allow me to pass out efficiently without hurting my neck like hell from putting all of my weight into it. I simply adjusted the rope noose on my basement ceiling beam to the right height. I plan to take SN most likely though, as sn is my first choice as of now. It was partial before I obtained sn.



So if it's rhino-sinusitis that's making you suicidal, maybe you will recover? When did you first get this? I read online that it lasts a couple of months often times. Is this what you believe is your case? Is it the pain that's driven you to suicide? Or is it just the icing on the cake( last straw to add to your depression)? Can you get the procedure done? What's holding you back from trying the procedure?



Best wishes man. Feel free to pm me if you'd like to talk more. I am more likely to respond faster to a pm.


Love and peace to you too!

 

[Timetodie90]

The pain in my neck only lasted about a week and it wasn't to bad to be fair. As I only hung for like two secounds.

The push down technique I feel will work for me. I have done it without cuffing my hands on my trial attempts. I dropped forward and caught myself by putting my hands out. When I dropped forward it tightened really quick. So if my hands are cuffed it should work. I will do it on a night at my flat using my kitchen door. I also very very rarely drink alcohol and I don't take any sleeping pills. Aswell I'm on meds that make you sleepy with alcohol. So I will use this to my advantage to ctb as I will set everything up and then get drunk and take sleeping pills. So I can get over any SI and so it is less painful. SN is actually my no.1 option. I just need to get it. Current circumstances makes that difficult and it will take a while for me to get it. But my new meds are helping me to relax and be patient. As they say patience is a virtue.

I've had Chronic Rhino-Sinusitis for about 10 years. It's actually Chronic Rhinitis but I'm prone to bouts of Sinusitis. I've had two operations on my nose and they said they can do no more apparently. But they said this before my first operation and before my secound. They just don't want to help as it costs money. But this new type of surgery is currently only available in the USA. It's apparently coming to the UK in 2020 although it may be delayed due to the Coronavirus. So hopefully I can get it done. It has helped many people who are in the same situation as me. It's the pain and constant runny nose and mucus. It's makes your day so hard. I have had mental health problems all my life aswell. I tried to ctb 20 years ago when I was 9.

I will PM you and we can continue our chat on there my friend.