Discussion Is adopting cats while still being suicidal immoral?

[beyond.space]

So, I've been suicidal for a while and recently decided that I have to CTB soon. I wanted it to be in November, but I realized much of my art is unfinished, and it's the way I express my most profound sentiments, through drawing and poetry (I'm not very good at either, but I'm pleased enough with what I do). So I decided to extend my time here indefinitely, until I'm able to finish all my drawings, so that people will at least sort of understand what was going on with me after I pass. I will also leave notes, already written, to my close ones but I mainly just ask for their forgiveness and thank them for everything in them.

Anyway, since I will probably be here for some more time, I took the decision to adopt two little kittens. They are lovely, I just found them on an adoption site by chance (I've had a cat before, so I know everything about raising one). The thing is, I think it's highly immoral for me to do so. My suicidal ideation will probably never go away and I have no intention of being saved, so I don't know why I did this besides my love for animals and my wanting to help stray cats. But I'm basically fighting myself here, because I know I want and need to CTB in the next couple of months, so what will happen to them? They will surely get attached and miss me even if they find a new home.

I believe this is also my brain trying to keep me alive, or basically just myself fighting the urge to CTB and begin recovery by hanging on to life just for my pets. I'm also going to therapy, but nothing ever helped, I'm too much of a pessimist to ever be able to enjoy this miserable existence.

What do you think? It's probably immoral but should I just cancel everything and go on with my plans? I really believe recovery is not possible for me, but at the same time, why am I making such decisions? Would you do the same, granted you love animals like me and would like to help them?

 

[gunmetalblue11]

But I'm basically fighting myself here, because I know I want and need to CTB in the next couple of months, so what will happen to them? They will surely get attached and miss me even if they find a new home.

I adopted a cat many years ago when I volunteered in a shelter. Still have her today, and I have taken care of her to the best of my ability through thick and thin. An animal is a lifelong investment, and choice. Not something to be taken lightly, and not something to be considered to fill a void, even if the intentions are good.
Today she has terminal cancer, a few months left at best. And I have been waiting, and actively planning to ctb once and for all, and I will wait until she passes. Because I feel that as the person who has taken the responsibility of her care, and bonded with her, and just simply my love for her, I cannot abandon her. And so I'll wait until she passes then follow right behind.

If you actively plan to die, please don't adopt those kittens. But, and I say this only in the possibility you will do it anyway, please at least plan for them to be rehomed safely to a loving family if ever it comes to that. Cats are sensitive animals, they feel grief. So yes it might affect them. But it is possible that they might also be fine with time. If you wish to get the kittens and honestly think it could help you in potencjał recovery, if you wish to go down that road, then that is another story.
In any case I am sorry you are in pain and that life led you here. And I hope you make the right decision.

 

[rs929]

I want to adopt a pet but I feel I can't because it would be an obstacle for eventually CTB'ing. Yes it's possible to give them to someone else or a shelter, but I'm afraid that wouldn't be optimal for them.
On the other hand, a pet could help a lot with recovery. I'd say if you're willing to give recovery a chance, they could be life saving.
But if you already made up your mind and decided to die, then I wouldn't do it.

 

[LittleNelson]

There is never anything wrong with helping an animal who needs you. I desperately want to adopt a dog from our local shelter but I'm allergic to them all except purebred poodles. Give those kittens all the love and attention they deserve while you're here. If you do plan to CTB please make some sort of arrangements for them.

 

[Pluto]

 

[piss]

immoral if you don't find someone to take care of them after you pass, imo... in the meantime, if you can take care of a cat that would otherwise be stuck in a shelter, why not, kinda like a foster family
a strong bond with a cat could be a strong reason to keep on living, i know that's the case with mine

 

[Heidi48]

So, I've been suicidal for a while and recently decided that I have to CTB soon. I wanted it to be in November, but I realized much of my art is unfinished, and it's the way I express my most profound sentiments, through drawing and poetry (I'm not very good at either, but I'm pleased enough with what I do). So I decided to extend my time here indefinitely, until I'm able to finish all my drawings, so that people will at least sort of understand what was going on with me after I pass. I will also leave notes, already written, to my close ones but I mainly just ask for their forgiveness and thank them for everything in them.

Anyway, since I will probably be here for some more time, I took the decision to adopt two little kittens. They are lovely, I just found them on an adoption site by chance (I've had a cat before, so I know everything about raising one). The thing is, I think it's highly immoral for me to do so. My suicidal ideation will probably never go away and I have no intention of being saved, so I don't know why I did this besides my love for animals and my wanting to help stray cats. But I'm basically fighting myself here, because I know I want and need to CTB in the next couple of months, so what will happen to them? They will surely get attached and miss me even if they find a new home.

I believe this is also my brain trying to keep me alive, or basically just myself fighting the urge to CTB and begin recovery by hanging on to life just for my pets. I'm also going to therapy, but nothing ever helped, I'm too much of a pessimist to ever be able to enjoy this miserable existence.

What do you think? It's probably immoral but should I just cancel everything and go on with my plans? I really believe recovery is not possible for me, but at the same time, why am I making such decisions? Would you do the same, granted you love animals like me and would like to help them?

ive always been a dog person and married to a cat lover...

10000%. just today i turned to my cat ( tears rolling down my face) to say, i might have to say goodbye!! she walked off- arse in my face

 

[WakingNightmare]

I think it would be, I am not going to leave anyone behind and am happy to suffer for duration of my pet's lifespan

 

[chudeatte]

I was wondering this too, ive always wanted a cat and I feel if I have something to look after it'll make me stay or have purpose. I mean I have dogs but theyre not really mine theyre family pets, so theyd still be looked after if I died. but id feel terrible if I got a cat of my own and left it with my family, I wouldn't want them to take it in because they didn't want it, I did, and theyd probably see it as a burden and I wouldn't want it to go through that. and id feel terrible giving it away. I think in a sense it could be immoral if you knew 100% you're going to kill yourself and adopted anyway, but sometimes animals can give you purpose and can make you feel enough love to keep on living even if its just for them. but an animal isnt something material or short term, its a living creature with needs and stuff. its beneficial to think it through as much as possible, no matter what choice you make

 

[Thalassa]

So, I've been suicidal for a while and recently decided that I have to CTB soon. I wanted it to be in November, but I realized much of my art is unfinished, and it's the way I express my most profound sentiments, through drawing and poetry (I'm not very good at either, but I'm pleased enough with what I do). So I decided to extend my time here indefinitely, until I'm able to finish all my drawings, so that people will at least sort of understand what was going on with me after I pass. I will also leave notes, already written, to my close ones but I mainly just ask for their forgiveness and thank them for everything in them.

Anyway, since I will probably be here for some more time, I took the decision to adopt two little kittens. They are lovely, I just found them on an adoption site by chance (I've had a cat before, so I know everything about raising one). The thing is, I think it's highly immoral for me to do so. My suicidal ideation will probably never go away and I have no intention of being saved, so I don't know why I did this besides my love for animals and my wanting to help stray cats. But I'm basically fighting myself here, because I know I want and need to CTB in the next couple of months, so what will happen to them? They will surely get attached and miss me even if they find a new home.

I believe this is also my brain trying to keep me alive, or basically just myself fighting the urge to CTB and begin recovery by hanging on to life just for my pets. I'm also going to therapy, but nothing ever helped, I'm too much of a pessimist to ever be able to enjoy this miserable existence.

What do you think? It's probably immoral but should I just cancel everything and go on with my plans? I really believe recovery is not possible for me, but at the same time, why am I making such decisions? Would you do the same, granted you love animals like me and would like to help them?

Yes, it would be highly immoral. If you haven't adopted them yet, then kudos for asking. If you've already adopted them, then you need to find homes for them immediately - while they are still cute kittens. I'm a former rescuer who used to rescue street kittens and "TNR" the moms (trap, neuter, [vaccinate] and return).

It was always a stressful race to find homes for the kittens while they were still cute kittens. Generally speaking, people do not want to adopt adult cats. You said yourself, "They will surely get attached and miss me even if they find a new home."
"…even IF they find a new home."

And the issue isn't that they will miss you. The issue is that if you leave behind cats or semi-grown cats (and they will start looking like cats very, very quickly), their chances of being adopted will have gone down astronomically. And if they wind up on the streets, they will live short, horrible, desperate lives and will die from starvation, diseases, cars, injuries, infections, or parasites - among other things.

But if I'm understanding you correctly, you haven't adopted the kittens yet, so pat yourself on the back for doing the right thing and confirming here that it would be immoral to adopt the kittens - unless you can recover (and I would suggest seeing a psychiatrist in addition to your therapist if possible).

When you adopt kittens, you are committing to take care of them for the rest of their lives. And with proper home care and veterinary care (which you are also committing to) they can live 18 - 20 years. Humans are a great ape species and we do not have more inherent worth than cats. They are our fellow animals and are highly intelligent apex predators.

But it is a myth that they are independent animals. They are domesticated animals that are half the size of their wild ancestors and they are just as dependent on humans as dogs.

Anyway, I didn't mean to go off on a tangent. But again, kudos for asking. I wish you all the best with your therapy.