Ironic how preparing looks like recovery from the outside.

[Oathkeeper]

Cleaned my room for the first time in months today. Finally folded the never ending pile of laundry in my closet. Going to get my car cleaned and an oil change this weekend. Squaring off my financials. Organizing my collectibles. Cleaning up my computer desktop, organizing everything there too.

From the outside, a level-headed person would probably think I'm trying to pick myself up. But the reality is that I'm preparing for the end, so that my family and friends have as little to deal with as possible.

My head hurts. My body hurts. I just wish I had the courage to fucking do it.

 

[FuneralCry]

I really wish that it's not so difficult to cease existing on our own terms but anyway I wish you the best, I understand why you'd just want to be free from all the suffering.

 

[Eternal🌈Rainbow]

From the outside, a level-headed person would probably think I'm trying to pick myself up. But the reality is that I'm preparing for the end, so that my family and friends have as little to deal with as possible.

Yes, totally.
I've thought about this many times since I started making preparations. It's ironic how it looks like recovery from the outside, absolutely. And sadly.

All my best wishes to you, and a warm hug. I hope you're able to find peace soon