introduction

[ember_]

i dont have the energy to write everything out, will just spew out my diagnoses and whatever

hi im ember, 19 year old ftm with no chance of passing, 1.50m tall (5'0), long story

autistic chonically ill and a tranny, gods favorite combo. depression autism anxiety disorder, schizophrenic, daily seizures and tics due to failed CTB sometime in 2021,2022 it's all a blur

crippling POTS and seizures make me unable to have a job or be in school and also had a TBI due to my failed CTB, traumatized by the medical system so i have no idea of the extent

recently escaped my abusive parents and moved in together with my mtf girlfriend that at least likes me for being trans but i feel like im not bringing anything to the relationship by being so disabled and reliant on her

im medicated for schizo bipolar and depression but its not working at all and disability is fucking me up so much that i cant think and CTB has been on my mind since the day i attempted and failed (i was stupid and tried to use pills and got found in the end but i was almost gone and was in a coma for a few weeks, apparently a miracle i survived.....)

hanging is my prefered method this time but i dont really want to use my brain right now ill take my clozepine and pass out until tommorow then ill ramble more i guess

im just sorry that i exist, moved from burden on my parents to burden on my girlfriend

 

[tiredcatboy]

Hello, fellow FTM trans person who has 0 chance of passing as well as POTS, CFS/ME, etc.

I am so sorry to hear about this..I hope you find peace in whatever happens.

 

[realname]

POTS maketh me wanna die too , along with many other things.
In solidarity, and also sucks you have a TBI from failed attempt. I wish you the best in the rest of life and death. Just wanted you to know I read your story and that's all.

 

[ember_]

thank you so much, i feel a little less lonely after venting here, it's nice not being told to just get therapy or go outside

Hello, fellow FTM trans person who has 0 chance of passing as well as POTS, CFS/ME, etc.

I am so sorry to hear about this..I hope you find peace in whatever happens.

saw a bunch of other trans people on here it's kinda conforting but understandable with how the world has been lately

 

[tiredcatboy]

thank you so much, i feel a little less lonely after venting here, it's nice not being told to just get therapy or go outside

saw a bunch of other trans people on here it's kinda conforting but understandable with how the world has been lately

Yeah..shit sucks right now. I'm just glad you feel less lonely. ♡
I believe everyone deserves comfort and solice.