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stellabelle

stellabelle

ethereal
Dec 14, 2018
3,919
some days are like unpaved roads and others are cold nights when the first snowfall hits and you begin to freeze. everything stops. the emotions stop.

it's the mornings that you set three or five alarms to go off every five minutes and for the life of you, you can't drag yourself up out of bed and the dark circles under your eyes tell another story no matter how much sleep you had.

it's stumbling into counseling for the third or fourth or fifth consistent week, breaking down in tears, and being referred to a therapist as well to start going twice a week.

it's breaking down to a close friend who you trust and crying for an hour about how you just don't want to wake up anymore as they drive you in circles listening and allowing you to let it out.

it's being burned out, being down to your last few dollars, it's dragging yourself around and failing to accomplish much of anything sometimes.

sometimes it morphs into laughter and jokes and art and happiness and this warm feeling around you; at least until the wind blows and chills you to the bone and you just lay there because you haven't quite figured out what you're even doing with yourself or your life at the very moment.

i guess some days just remind me of the night sky because everything is completely dark and there are spots of glitter shining through. sometimes the moonlight illuminates the way.
 

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